Posts by GrreatTeacher

48

Struggling

by Alive! in

i read here regularly and although i haven't joined in, i really appreciate all the wonderful contributions from those who are willing to share their experiences.... .

i was a convert.

i won't go into the whole history ( perhaps another day) - my story could easily be recognised in the small town where i live, with my husband.. so, we stopped going to the meetings around a period of time when we were going through severe emotional difficulties - at that point, we needed unconditional family love - the hectic, forced jw dinner parties and social occasions gave no real comfort.

GrreatTeacher

Hi, Alive! I just wanted to let you know that I hear the amount of pain you are in and you're in my thoughts.

I suffer from bipolar disorder and sometimes the depression gets bad. Psychological pain is real pain and I can empathize.

My advice is to be kind to yourself daily. Go outside and get some exercise in the sunshine. Eat healthy food. Go to the produce section and buy beautiful, colorful fruits and veggies! Take a warm bubble bath. Drink chamomile tea before bed. Get plenty of sleep. Leave your shades open so you wake up to sunshine!

And, please go see your doctor if you begin to feel absolutely hopeless. Depression is common, but a diagnosed major depressive episode can be deadly.

You will be able to build a new life. There are sooo many others on this board who have had their young adult years stolen and who are now building a positive and even exciting new life.

Thank you for dropping in. It will be such a pleasure to get to know you better!

47

All you men here, who does the house cleaning?

by James Mixon in

jw
friends

do you help or is this a woman job?

have you change your ways since.

leaving the borg.

GrreatTeacher

My sister has her house cleaned every other week. But, she has to have everything picked up and put away before they come, so it's like having to clean the house before the cleaners come to clean the house!

47

All you men here, who does the house cleaning?

by James Mixon in

jw
friends

do you help or is this a woman job?

have you change your ways since.

leaving the borg.

GrreatTeacher

You're right, cappytan it's a pattern and humans are creatures of habit.

If you make a new habit/pattern to come home from work and just do one small chore before even sitting down, it will become just as natural to you in time.

You've got to harness the human tendency to habitual behavior to your advantage.

For me, I throw in one load of laundry as soon as I come home. It's just like an extension of my work day.

And then you will come to understand why women don't feel their stress go away when the work day is over. Their stress levels are just as high because they are thinking of all the work that needs to be done at home. (the second shift)

47

All you men here, who does the house cleaning?

by James Mixon in

jw
friends

do you help or is this a woman job?

have you change your ways since.

leaving the borg.

GrreatTeacher

My husband does the grocery shopping and cooking. When I have to cook, it's very simple fare which he doesn't really care for. I usually do the dishes and clean up the kitchen.

I do most of the indoor cleaning with the exception of the bathtubs. Even with Scrubbing Bubbles, it takes me forever to get the grime out of the tub and he can knock it out in a few minutes!

My son, who is 14, helps with the vacuuming sometimes and yesterday he helped mow the lawn.

My husband does exterior maintenance, but the gardening we do together. He has done the snowblowing in the past, but my son now also helps with that.

I do all the laundry. I also do the finances. These are things I like to do, though.

He does the car maintenance though I pump my own gas.

Home improvement work we work on together, though anything that has to be assembled is my job. I was the one who always stayed up late Christmas Eve assembling various large toys!

I feel like our arrangement is very fair and we both seem to be satisfied.

45

can an unhappy married woman vent?

by sowhatnow in

i continue to be saddened by the fact that i am married to such a selfish man.. i want to know if i am the only wife who has no say when it comes to using the house she lives in for activities including other people.. .

let me explain.. yesterday my daugher who is 35 got a new puppy for my grandaughter who is 13. today my daughter and son in law are going to help my uncle at a job, and my granddaughter wanted to spend the day here, my daugher said shed bring her and the puppy over, i laughed and said 'your dad wont have that, ill have to go to your house'.. after all it will 'upset' the 2 cats they will hide all day [like they do anytime someone including my grandchild is in my home] .. i already knew that he would not like it if she brought the puppy over, [weve had dogs so its not like he hates them].

he doesnt care if his grandaughter would have enjoyed playing with the puppy over grandmas house, where she likes to be for a change, and that fact that id like to see what my cats would do when they saw a dog for the first time in thier lives.. maybe id have liked to play with the puppy .. when i said to my husband that my daughter said she wanted tp bring them over he said.

GrreatTeacher

Hi, sowhatnow. I remember this post from 4 months ago and I'm glad to see that you are making progress. What broke my heart was when you said you miss your cats. :(

However, so much has happened to you in such a short period of time that I can hardly believe it! A new apartment! Alimony! Dating!

I read through the entire thread again and what I noticed most is your change in outlook. Your old posts were very pessimistic, but this last post has you sounding much more optimistic. It's so much easier to get through the day from a position of optimism.

I think now that you have all your time to yourself that you'll be able to find things that interest you. Just try everything! You'll dislike some of it, but it takes lots of exploring to find yourself. This is what most people do in adolesence and young adulthood, but you had this stolen from you. Do it now. Do it bravely. You will eventually find a stable sense of self.

You are so very brave! Congratulations on your new start in life!

GrreatTeacher

45

Hold Me, Thrill Me

by Hold Me-Thrill Me in

jw
friends

i'm going to be honest and from the heart when i say that for 40 years in the jw religion i was very happy in my ignorance!

man, what a trip it was.

i loved every minute of it but then i was absent the bad in my religion.

GrreatTeacher

I wouldn't want to be part of an imperfect organization.

45

Why do we get TTATT and others don't?

by quest81 in

jw
friends

i have thought about how ttatt came full circle for me.

how the connecting the dots was simple and just made sense,.

how silos of information are literally at our fingertips today.. why is it that the ones we love cannot get ttatt?.

GrreatTeacher

You have to be willing to think for yourself and then trust your conclusions.

It's no coincidence that being an "independent thinker" is a big Watchtower sin.

16

Last chance to make an impact! Help me please....

by Anon_SA1 in

jw
friends

so tomorrow is going to be my last encounter with a jw friend of mine for various reasons on her side.

(long story).

i have spent a lot of time discussing various concerns about the jw teachings, but havent been able to make any progress in helping her to question or doubt the teachings.

GrreatTeacher

"I absolutely love you and your religion is absolutely crazy.

I will always be here for you. Any time in the future, just give me a call and I'll be there."

34

April video online, "endurance"

by bohm in

april video online.

at around 42 minutes, a women find jehovahs witness, but her husband is not too hot on the idea and so she has to study with her children in secret.

however eventually the husband prays to jehovah that if jehovah will help him find a leak in a construction he is working on, he will go to a meeting and presto, the next day jehovah help him find the leak so now he is a witness..

GrreatTeacher

Jehovah won't change your flat tire while you have AAA Roadside Assistance. This shows a lack of trust.

Definitely get rid of Roadside Assistance, the car jack and the tire iron, possibly even the spare tire. This will show you have confidence in Jehovah.

Only then have you shown the requisite amount of faith for him to fix your flat.

9

Toss a smart bomb

by Giordano in

i meet regularly for a bro lunch with a couple of friends of mine.

the conversation is usually first rate and free flowing.

one day we were talking about education and i mentioned that having been raised in a cult i had passed on college...... to pioneer.. .

GrreatTeacher

You encountered a teachable moment. And you seized it.

The beauty of the teachable moment is that their interest is already there and ready to be engaged.

We all need to be aware of these opportunities and have an appropriate script for discussion ready in our minds.

Good job!