Morocco:
I can't help but feel that maybe we make our own answers and, at the very least, the Christian God (or maybe all others) just simply don't exist
You know there is a lot of wisdom in your post.
Could it be you simply see a serious problem with attributing a gloriously infinite universe to a contrastingly small and limited deity? I mean certainly the real Source of such wonder and grandeur must be unimaginably more vast and beautiful than anything religion has to offer; especially to what's found within the pages of the Bible.
I suggest you honor your innate wisdom, and let go of images of gods and deities gleemed from a page or playing upon the screen of imagination, and instead focus on what it is to be alive in the present moment. Dive into the reality of your most intimate sense of being and existing. Discover what is at your core. Accept only what is undeniably real.
j