I get the feeling that you are so angry, that you have ceased your spiritual quest and turned to agnosticism or worse, atheism in your bitterness.
I gave reference to: what has no beginning and no end, and to That which unites us one and all. Compared to the diminutive Christian concept of god, yes, it is understandable you would see me as atheist.
you don't like for your conscience to hurt, so you will justify your actions and inactions some way. But, believe me, Sis, someday, you will have to account for your lack of love...real honest-to-God love. Then you can stand before Him and say, "But didn't I give up my flesh and blood for you!" Don't think He won't see right through that.
Here, you blatantly condemn your sister. Telling her how your god will see through her. Which implies that you must believe yourself somehow more pure in your god's eyes. You, know how to "truly" love, were she does not. You are good, she is bad.
This is the same self-righteous and judgmental us-against-them beliefs that the Witnesses use to separate and divide people. You're still doing it. The Christian beliefs are based on such division.
I suggested finding instead what unites you and your dear sister, and all existence. But this you ignore....and perhaps even see such words as a terrible thing. This is why I am angry.
I am angry not at you or other people, but rather at religious-beliefs, any beliefs, which ignore what truly unites us one and all and instead reinforces and sustains ideas which divide us causing much suffering, animosity and war.
Sometimes there is a valid reason to be angry.
j