We may find at the root of the causes of personal angst around leaving the Witnesses – other than personal family ties and social issues – is the mental dynamics of our cherished beliefs about 'God'.
Can it be seen that all religious beliefs regarding a 'God', are nothing but that? Nothing but beliefs?
Beliefs are only mind-generated concepts and ideas that are far removed from the reality of life and existence. So, my suggestion as to “what will I do?” is to first clearly see that every thought you have about what is “Truth”, and/or what is “God”, in nothing more than an abstract mental construct, and not genuine reality at all. Not Truth. Then, it may become obvious what you do next.
What you do from then on is spend less
time in your mind and its thoughts and conceptual notions about life,
and spend more time with LIFE.
You can not imagine the weight that leaves you when you let go of all the massive mental collection of “what life is all about”, and silently just be with life instead.
Find out what it is like to really be present and attentive to the embrace of nature in and around you. Let it fill the void in you that caused you to create a make-believe “God” in the first place.
Be still, and know...