scotsman

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Posts by scotsman

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  18

  Question for my friends on the other side of the pond

  by loosie in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  is wanker a bad word in the uk?.

  or is it like telling someone there are a goober?.

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  scotsman

  As with the previously discussed cnut, context and intent are everything. With friends it's inocuous, against strangers it's offensive.
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  8

  Anyone have a parent who is gay?

  by Ziggy in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  good afternoon!

  my apologies if this has been asked before, but i am wondering:.

  (1) if there is anyone on this forum, who has a mom or dad who opened up that they were gay?.

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  scotsman

  I'm not in your situation but... I resigned as an elder and stopped attending meetings at 30 revealing that I had never believed in god. Family upset but not shunning. When I came out 1 year later one of my brothers and his family decided to shun me despite me not being disfellowshipped. We discussed their hypocrisy of finding my disbelief in god easier to deal with than me having a boyfriend but hey ho somehow the gay thing was much worse.

  Sorry I can't help, but even more sorry your kids have behaved like this. Hopefully time will make a difference.
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  117

  I'm Attending the Memorial

  by RichieRich in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  my lovely girlfriend and i sat down over a homecooked meal, and discussed the pros and cons of attending the memorial.. i decided, with her support, that we would attend.. i spent years of my life pretending to be a witness to please my mother.

  when i left the witnesses, my mother said some hurtful things.. and those things really hurt me... for a while.

  but i established myself as my own person, developed my own relationships, and have gotten a good start on my own life.. i don't know that i want to hurt my mother back, but i do want to make it abundantly clear to her, my grandmother, and all the members of my former congregation, that richierich is alive and kicking.. and i think that walking into the kingdom hall, dressed respectfully in a suit, yet with full piercing jewelry intact, and with erika wearing something classy that steals the brother's eyes, and draws glares from the humble sisters, will be just the thing to send that message to my mother.. i don't plan on partaking or making a disturbance.

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  scotsman

  Hey Richie

  Good luck, but... if i read correctly you haven't had contact with your mon and gran for 10 months. Seeing them may make you blub like a baby and may not feel like closure. Closure in 10 months after 18 years would be a frickin' miracle too.

  I went through all sorts of plans when I left from knocking back all the wine at the memorial to turning up at an assembly in drag (looking fabulous but fierce). I have no regrets about not doing them.

  But again, best of luck.
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  23

  Pan's Labyrinth

  by Mystla in

  1. social
  2. entertainment

  has anyone here seen this movie?

  if there has already been mention of it, i'm sorry, i've been afk off and on quite a bit the last month or so and have missed a lot of threads.. this is one of those hard to categorize movies.

  it's a fairy tale.

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  scotsman

  I loved it. The merging of reality with fantasy was seamless. Reminded me of the role of faith in society.

  But the best Spanish film from last year has to be Volver - it was heaven.
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  45

  When "friends" let you down...

  by Crumpet in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  have you ever been in a position where you really needed your friends - ie a relationship break down, or some other event and expected your friends to rally and support you.

  only to find that those friends are nowhere to be seen or heard and when you tentatively enquire how they are in the hope for some kind response you get - "oh well you'll get over it.

  " or words to that effect and by email.. i have as you can guess a reason and recent experience of my own that i'll share later, but i wondered how do you handle that?

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  scotsman

  I've come to accept that friendships evolve, they wax, they wane and sometimes end. Some people give a lot, others take a lot and unless you want to be perpetually hung up on it you have to let things slide.
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  38

  I applied to a university yesterday.

  by kwintestal in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  after a few years of humming and hawing, i decided i would.

  it was more of what i would take that held me back then if i should go.. i'm only 28, so i'm not too far behind.

  we'll see how working full time and going to school will go.

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  scotsman

  Hi Crumpet

  I only applied for the one course at one uni, but that was 7 years ago so maybe things have changed. I imagine it's as you suggest, a standby course.
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  38

  I applied to a university yesterday.

  by kwintestal in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  after a few years of humming and hawing, i decided i would.

  it was more of what i would take that held me back then if i should go.. i'm only 28, so i'm not too far behind.

  we'll see how working full time and going to school will go.

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  scotsman

  Crumps, are you try to jinx German? Barrel has only one l. Unless you had a drink halfway through the word and then saw double.

  German XJW where are you applying to study?
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  38

  I applied to a university yesterday.

  by kwintestal in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  after a few years of humming and hawing, i decided i would.

  it was more of what i would take that held me back then if i should go.. i'm only 28, so i'm not too far behind.

  we'll see how working full time and going to school will go.

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  scotsman

  Good for you.

  I started uni at 29 (while still a dub and an elder) and found that extra decade a distinct advantage. Because I had a life, and no fear of failure, I had less pressure than a lot of the 18 year olds despite continuing to run my business. Got my MA and now finishing an MSc and have enjoyed most of it.

  Can't recall if you're single or not, but I've seen some relationships go through a crucible when one partner's at uni. But it's all character building!
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  29

  THE IMPORTANCE OF HOLDING HANDS!

  by Dansk in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  i started a thread a long hug http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/128891/1.ashx which touches on the below, but feel this subject deserves a thread of its own.. a study, highlighted on bbc breakfast news yesterday, acknowledged the importance of holding hands in a relationship, courting or married.

  it was stated that couples who hold hands in the street are more likely to have a solid relationship - and especially those who interlink their fingers when holding hands as this indicates a desire to be as close to each other as possible.

  arm linking is ok, too, but couples who just walk about not holding hands - and this includes married couples - indicates the relationship could be in trouble.. do you hold hands with your spouse/partner?

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  scotsman

  I'm happy to, but my partner is afraid of us having to deal with hostile reactions.
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  6

  How much younger or older were your JW friends at the hall

  by JH in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i used to hang out with only older people.

  the ones my age were married and had kids so i didnt fit in.. i was always with people 20 and even 30 years older than me.

  it was as if i was their age.. i don't think it's healthy to hang around with people much older or younger like that.

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  scotsman

  I think it's pretty healthy to have friends that are much older and younger than you, in fact it's one of the things I missed when I initially left. It may not be ideal to have only older friends, but I'm not sure why you couldn't fit in with your peers that were married with kids.