Geez anti-absolution. There were too many types of abuse going on.
I am not surprised at this elders comment towards you, given your personal experience (trauma) with your father.
From what I can recall, it's like...no matter what: it's somehow your fault
It's almost like the battered-wife syndrome: you deserved it, you provoked it, you initiated this behaviour so as it to take place - that the abused will wrongly take the blame for something that they DID NOT do wrong. Anything to stop the yelling, screaming and beatings. It never stops, it could have and would have continued.....and good on ya for going to Aunt Liz's place.
The abuse of your trust for confiding in him, as well as the lack of comfort and support from this elder, was evident.
Can you imagine had you been sexually abused by a member of the congregation? Perish the thought, but I think you know where I'm going with this.
We all know what goes on with matters pertaining to that. I wonder how that particular elder would have handled that one?
You have every right to ask any questions you may have to this elder.
If you are seeking comfort and support, I honestly think it's the wrong place to find it.
I hope you'll remain here with us anti-absolution. Thank you for sharing your story, I am so sorry to know that you had to endure such a horrific incident.
You'll be safe and sound here .
Edited by - RAYZORBLADE on 10 February 2003 6:22:41