If you are a current or active JW, you cannot help but feel you are in a bind. While you have discovered the truth about the truth and has continuously researched on it, you cannot help also but to regard the fellowship inside, add perhaps those encouraging teachings which build up faith and spirituality.
The reality is you cannot just turn a blind eye on the goodness in the organization too or shall we say some of its members who are also standing by you. Somehow, you felt the FDS food is helping you in a spiritual sense. On the other hand, you cannot also ignore such erratic doctrines on 1914, Last Days, 144K, new light, Generation flip-flop, etc. Here is where cognitive dissonance surfaces.
What a situation to be in. Not easy. Roller-coster ride. One day you are full-blooded JW, next day and you saw questionable activities in the organization, you become half-hearted. Very Challenging.
For the brothers who are still in yet confused, how are you coping up and dealing with our situation? And for those who decided to get out already, did you feel at some point you should have not left?