years ago when everything was going pear shaped for me in my personal life and in the congregation, i saw my opportunity to leave.
i had no friends, the elders didn't like me and i was one step away from resigning.
i had nothing to lose.. this was back in '97 before i got the internet.. one of my regrets is that i didn't leave when i had the chance.
It's been interesting reading your comments. I really wish I could go back in time and make the decision to walk away. So much has happened since then.
At that time, I still believed it was the truth, I didn't know what I did now, and that was the only thing that kept me from walking away.
Someone build me a time machine...
years ago when everything was going pear shaped for me in my personal life and in the congregation, i saw my opportunity to leave.
i had no friends, the elders didn't like me and i was one step away from resigning.
i had nothing to lose.. this was back in '97 before i got the internet.. one of my regrets is that i didn't leave when i had the chance.
Years ago when everything was going pear shaped for me in my personal life and in the congregation, I saw my opportunity to leave. I had no friends, the elders didn't like me and I was one step away from resigning. I had nothing to lose.
This was back in '97 before I got the internet.
One of my regrets is that I didn't leave when I had the chance. I could have altered the course of my life if I had just walked away - I mean, when you've lost everything what else is there to lose?
Have any of you passed up an opportuntity to leave the truth and regretted not taking it later?
hi everyone, in the congregation i grew up in, it was very cold and unloving.
circuit overseers would come and go, they would give counsel and nothing changed.
at one time even the do came at the same time as the co and gave counsel to 'widen out'.
The congregations in Chichester are poles apart - the south is unfriendly and cold, the north has more going for it. It's been a few years since I went to either one.
hi everyone, in the congregation i grew up in, it was very cold and unloving.
circuit overseers would come and go, they would give counsel and nothing changed.
at one time even the do came at the same time as the co and gave counsel to 'widen out'.
I don't know anyone by the name of Smart.
The young pioneers were bored in our hall and all moved to London. They felt that the ministry wasn't supported very well in their home congregation.
London was always seen to be the place to be.
hi everyone, in the congregation i grew up in, it was very cold and unloving.
circuit overseers would come and go, they would give counsel and nothing changed.
at one time even the do came at the same time as the co and gave counsel to 'widen out'.
Lozhasleft,
I visited Portsmouth North End (I think it was this one) with a brother once and hardly anyone acknowledged us. Five years is a long time to be accepted!
i was pretty much a loner the whole time i was in my old congregation, and it wasn't for lack of young people - there were plenty of "young ones", but because of various situations that went unchecked, rumors and just plain nastiness, i did not have any friends.. some of you might relate to this.
you feel like you don't fit in either camp - the world and the congregation - a rock in a hard place.. on the rare occasion i did get a token invite to a jw gathering, it was usually a video evening, as we called them in the uk.
since i had no social life to speak of, i would attend these rare and "exciting" events but it was always a let down.. you see, unless you have shared history with these folks, it's pretty much a non event.
Truthexplorer,
Thanks for sharing your experience. I can imagine how hard it was for you to give up everything for the truth, yet be treated like a nobody.
I thought this comment you made was profound....
In all probability, it is very likely that such ones are being set up to fail spiritually. Their needs are not being met socially.
You're absolutely spot on...many JWs are being setup to fail spiritually because they have no social network to support them. This was certainly the case with me. I can honestly say that from 15 onwards I had no social life at the weekends, on holidays etc. there was nothing. Meanwhile, my peers were going to concerts, playing football, taking day trips to Paris and there I was at home, surrounded by four walls.
I think that if I had a few friends it could have made a world of difference. I would not have felt a need to come onto this forum, although with all the recent changes in the org it was only a matter of when not if I found this website.
I remember one time when all the youths in the congregation went to Friday night bowling - I had no idea this event happened until the following day, I worked with a brother in field service and he asked me "so Truthseeker, did you go bowling last night?" - I was livid to say the least - darn, that memory is still fresh in my mind.
I remember a sister who came into the truth in her 20s, she was very active, loved sports and had to give up all her wordly friends. There was nothing organized in the congregation, everyone did their own thing with their own groups. I knew she wouldn't last long - her bible teacher even told me that she felt lonely. Within 2 years she was gone.
An elder in my own hall gave a local needs talk about how the youth in the congregation feel like they aren't wanted and even took comments. After the meeting, a brother who flat our ignored me and excluded me from every social event there was invited me to a video evening. I was so desperate for company I went, but again, it was a let down, because there is no shared history there and you feel like an outcast. It was a token gesture, like eating crumbs falling from the rich man's table.
i was pretty much a loner the whole time i was in my old congregation, and it wasn't for lack of young people - there were plenty of "young ones", but because of various situations that went unchecked, rumors and just plain nastiness, i did not have any friends.. some of you might relate to this.
you feel like you don't fit in either camp - the world and the congregation - a rock in a hard place.. on the rare occasion i did get a token invite to a jw gathering, it was usually a video evening, as we called them in the uk.
since i had no social life to speak of, i would attend these rare and "exciting" events but it was always a let down.. you see, unless you have shared history with these folks, it's pretty much a non event.
I was pretty much a loner the whole time I was in my old congregation, and it wasn't for lack of young people - there were plenty of "young ones", but because of various situations that went unchecked, rumors and just plain nastiness, I did not have any friends.
Some of you might relate to this. You feel like you don't fit in either camp - the world and the congregation - a rock in a hard place.
On the rare occasion I did get a token invite to a JW gathering, it was usually a video evening, as we called them in the UK. Since I had no social life to speak of, I would attend these rare and "exciting" events but it was always a let down.
You see, unless you have shared history with these folks, it's pretty much a non event. The whole evening might last 3 hours, the movie is 2 hours and then there's an hour left of awkwardness where you realize you have absolutely nothing in common with any of them and after the initial introductions, how's the job etc you're pretty much left out of the picture while you hear them talking about their vacations, who's going out with who and where the next meet up is.
Replace video evening with annual barbecue, wash and rinse...
Anyone here relate anything similar?
what was your reputation?
were you viewed as "mature", "worldly", or "exemplary"?
?.
Min,
I was none of those. Being of the mindset "bad associations spoil useful habits", I did not try to fit in with the world and unfortunately I did not fit in the congregation either. I had no friends for most of my youth. Because of a rumor that was spread about me, many thought I was weird and tried to avoid me or at best they were civil.
I happened to be thinking along the lines of this topic when I saw your post. Food at the proper time eh?
i've been gone for a while but i kind of miss you guys and gals so i decided to see what was up.
for me i found out a few days ago that in my old congregation the gossip about me ( i was first shocked that there was any gossip about me) is that i have started my own cult and i have a few followers (ex jdubs) wow!
i fell on my ass!
And there lies the problem AntiChrist - the elders and pretty much everyone else DON'T CARE
All the people we used to hang out with have shunned us and we are only inactive!!!
hi everyone, in the congregation i grew up in, it was very cold and unloving.
circuit overseers would come and go, they would give counsel and nothing changed.
at one time even the do came at the same time as the co and gave counsel to 'widen out'.
Bet nothing has changed nelly136!
