KiddingMe

Joined

• started 43 topics
• posted 815 times   see topics posted on
• send a message

Posts by KiddingMe

• 
  57

  Please Welcome me

  by Sofia Lose in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  have lurked here for many, many years.

  female, latina, middle-aged, born-in, 3rd generation jw, northeast usa.

  my fate is to continue to play the game 'till death do us part because the very strong and tangled web of friends, family, business, etc.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  KiddingMe

  Welcome Sofia!!
• 
  19

  Blondie's Highlights in February 22, 2015 WT Study (FACING THE END)

  by blondie in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

  paragraph 1.

  paragraph 2.

  paragraph 3.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  KiddingMe

  Thanks Blondie!!!!
• 
  59

  How to wake up and reverse the trance???

  by J-DUBBED in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  how do you wake up someone taken from us by these screwed up people?.

  our son was hooked by a jw at the age of 25. within 3 months they were married and we never even new about it.

  he is now 29 and has nothing to do with his family(except his sister the odd time, when he needs something) of any freinds.. we are lost and have been for four years.. .

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  KiddingMe

  Excellent explanation given by GrreatTeacher!

  Steve Hassan's books will help with methods for getting points across to cult members. It helps with identifying the cult vs natural personality and how to ask questions without coming of the wrong way. It also encourages you to learn as much as you can about the religion/cult your loved one is involved in.

  Raymond Franz's book will help you understand the religion and build your toolkit (for lack of a better word). This way, you have some background to base your questions/logic on. I wouldn't necessarily address these things directly with your son. This is for you to use and incorporate when trying to plant seeds of doubt; and help your son think for himself.
• 
  59

  How to wake up and reverse the trance???

  by J-DUBBED in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  how do you wake up someone taken from us by these screwed up people?.

  our son was hooked by a jw at the age of 25. within 3 months they were married and we never even new about it.

  he is now 29 and has nothing to do with his family(except his sister the odd time, when he needs something) of any freinds.. we are lost and have been for four years.. .

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  KiddingMe

  Desirous of Change- yes very awesome in dealing with someone trapped in the cult. I've read Combatting Cult Mind Control. I'm about half way through Steve Hassan's other book Freedom of Mind.

  J-Dubbed, have you tried to purchase online. Amazon carries them. The one I'm reading now is the kindle version.

  Another great book is Crisis of Conscience by Raymond Franz (former governing body member). It will help with understanding the religion. It is what helped opened my eyes to how the religion operates behind the scenes. It brings to light many of the things the average JW is not aware of.
• 
  56

  PBS program

  by wannaexit in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  watching the pbs program as i write...........

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  KiddingMe

  Thanks!!!!
• 
  101

  You will never grow old in this current system of things... - Awake, May 22, 1969 p. 15

  by cappytan in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  check this out.

  got this bound volume from my dad.. .

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  KiddingMe

  Marking! Thanks Cappytan!
• 
  59

  How to wake up and reverse the trance???

  by J-DUBBED in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  how do you wake up someone taken from us by these screwed up people?.

  our son was hooked by a jw at the age of 25. within 3 months they were married and we never even new about it.

  he is now 29 and has nothing to do with his family(except his sister the odd time, when he needs something) of any freinds.. we are lost and have been for four years.. .

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  KiddingMe

  My mom is 78, though she is ill, I'm fortunate to still have her. I missed sharing many celebrations with her and my family. Although birthdays aren't as big a deal to me, I know they are to her. I hope she makes it to her next birthday, so that we can share it together.

  I still haven't told her my revelations on being in this cult. Part of its because there is still a lack of trust in how she will react to the situation and I still need to help my children and possibly my husband wake up.

  That's how twisted this religion is. Even though, I've been a member for 20 years, if I bring criticism of the organization up in the wrong way, I will be viewed as a threat. So I must handle things carefully until i can help my children see things for themself.

  JDUBBED, it may not be easy but you have a lot in your favor. When I joined, there wasn't nearly as much support and information available on the Internet. The JW organization is very flawed, and are laying its own bed in some ways. They do not show unconditional love. Many experience burn out, they can not do enough without guilt being layed on them for not doing more. Use these as opportunities to support your boy.

  Part of what led me to becoming a JW was the structure and discipline. Everyone seemed genuinely nice (many are). Some things that stood out to me as positives coming in are not what they seemed. The Catholics were dealing with the paedophilia issue when I converted. How could they allow this (I thought)? The JW's pointed this out frequently, even in their magazines. Now the JWs are undergoing the same issue. They no longer address this about Catholics in the magazines.

  There's a lot about this religion your son may not even know. These are opportunities that over time you can use to your advantage to help enlighten your son, but it must be handled carefully. As he learns, it will be tough for him, it will be very risky for him to trust. The org teaches not to trust anyone not even yourself.

  Use this site, JWfacts and others to learn as much about this religion as you can. The more you understand, the better you will be able to help your son. It's a lot of work but worth it.

  Wishing you all the best.
• 
  59

  How to wake up and reverse the trance???

  by J-DUBBED in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  how do you wake up someone taken from us by these screwed up people?.

  our son was hooked by a jw at the age of 25. within 3 months they were married and we never even new about it.

  he is now 29 and has nothing to do with his family(except his sister the odd time, when he needs something) of any freinds.. we are lost and have been for four years.. .

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  KiddingMe

  J-DUBBED,

  There's a lot of great advice on this thread.

  i just want to emphasize the importance in focussing on rebuilding the relationship with your son and his family outside of the religion. If you want to be successful, it must be unconditional (accepting and respecting his wife). I know this is not easy when they allow the religion to dictate their relationship with you.

  Be a source of relief for your son. Try to build trust. This way, overtime, he may have you and your wife to confide in when things are not going well with the religion and/or his wife.

  At the same time, start planting seeds (without directly criticizing) like someone else mentioned above. Bring up a question, say someone else asked you or maybe in a matter of fact way (give time to think, but don't expect an answer). Don't argue the answer, the goal is to help them think for themself. This also enables him to think about it with forcing him to defend the religion to you.

  I was raised catholic. My mother was confrontational and critical of JWs from the beginning. This pushed me further into the religion. I did the same as your boy, referred to scriptures to explain everything. I dearly hoped my mom would convert but isolated from her because I felt her as a threat. I thought I was doing the right thing for my family It took me 20 years to open my eyes.

  I hope your son comes out sooner. If so, he will really need you guys support. Don't come off a threat, be a source of comfort. Continue to work on your relationship now. It will not be easy for him to just walk away, so he will need your support.

  If you haven't started yet, read the books mentioned. Keep posting and asking questions.
• 
  303

  The best reasonable, rational, intelligent discussion on religion I've ever seen

  by TerryWalstrom in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hl6e4emx-4k

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  KiddingMe

  Marking for later
• 
  24

  Goodbye and thank you.

  by wallievase in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  it's come time for me to leave.

  i honestly feel at this point continuing to visit this site and others like it is starting to hinder me from moving on by keeping all the feelings of pain, resentment, regret, etc fresh.. i haven't posted a lot since i have been on here but to those of you that replied when i did, i appreciate it very much.

  you helped me through a very rough time that is affecting me to this day.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  KiddingMe

  Wishing you all the best!!