Fantastic!!! I don't know what i would have done, if i were in your shoes, regarding my children.
Thank god I was out before they were born!
Mystery
JoinedPosts by Mystery
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30
Break through !
by Puternut ini have been df'd for about a year and also been going through a nasty divorce.
my ex has the kids and they're all jw's.
so my ex has been pumping into my childrens heads, that since i am df'd, they are to have no contact with me.
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My Husband Just Thinks I am Being Vindictive
by Mystery insituation:.
my mom and sister came down in november "during thanksgiving" break.
my mom has been a jw since i was 1 year old.
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Mystery
Thank you for your responses. I was a little upset last night due to calling to check on my nephew and receiving "his medical report" from my sister (he was in a bad 4-wheeler wreck two weeks ago) and then being "brushed off and dismissed".
I would much rather prefer to have her eyes open to ?the truth? than to be vindictive. Being 3 rd generation everything at ?home? is JW. Her husband works for a JW. My sister-in-law has 4 sisters. All JW?s. Everyone she associates with is JW.
She is the one everyone goes to, to help plan weddings, baby showers, parties, graduations? Even if she began to have doubts I don?t think she would ever leave. She would have let her son die 2 weeks ago IF he had of actually needed blood. Blood was mentioned and she told the doc. under no uncertain terms, absolutely not.
I believe 99% that she has not ?confessed? to the elders. I don?t think I could ever call the elders and say ?did you know??, nor could I call the husband and say it. But I know that I could ask her if she has ?confessed?; to let her know that I know that she isn?t as perfect as she perceives.
I could let her know, that I know, of her hypocrisy and ask her to show me where forgiveness had to come from the elders and not from Jehovah. Ask her to prove to me in the Bible that a body of elders are the ones that have to be told and have to do the forgiving. Then maybe from her answer, ask another question. And so on and so forth? Never really blackmailing her to research, but just perceiving that it would be a possibility that if she didn't, i would tell.
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My Husband Just Thinks I am Being Vindictive
by Mystery insituation:.
my mom and sister came down in november "during thanksgiving" break.
my mom has been a jw since i was 1 year old.
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Mystery
Situation:
My mom and sister came down in November "during Thanksgiving" break. My mom has been a JW since I was 1 year old. My sister - her entire life. She married an unbeliver who is now a MS. A daughter (17 yrs old) that is pioneering and a son (15 yrs) who is not yet baptised; but soon will be.
During their visit, I assume, that "they finally decided" that i am an "unbeliever". I have been fading for 22 years. I will not return to this hypocritical religion. My mom, who has talked/emailed to me for the past 22 years has now decided not to take my phone calls/emails.
My sister, Ms. Holier than Tho, only talks to me regarding "illnesses or illness related tragedy" - so the WTBTS says, right?
So it has become evident to me that I am no longer in their lives except when it comes to "illness".
I guess, unofficially, I am DF'ed in their eyes. As it seems to me.
So the Dilemma is: (which my husband thinks I am being a total B.... about)
A few years ago; I know, for a fact, that my sister had an affair. Yes! Ms. Holier than Tho judging me now, had an affair.
I know I am very bitter right now. My "family" with their conditional love is basically disowning me. And I am not sure if I am glad that it is finally coming to a close or not. But I want so much to email my sister and simply ask her if she has ask the "ELDERS!!!" for forgiveness. Asking Jehovah doesn't count because she has to confess to the ELDERS!!!!
I know if this was actually found out that she would be publicly humiliated . I am typically not a vindictive person. I have been thru so much this past couple of years that I could not bear to hurt anyone. So why am I so enticed with badgering my sister with this info? Besides wanting to get the "last dig in" before they completely disown me?
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31
what do you believe???
by walker22 ini have been df for a nummber of years now and have recently been doing research via the web for the past few weeks.
mostly because my new husband has been also doing his own research because i have been saying for years i want to go back, but never have and he had questions about the religion that he didnt understand.
the only time i ever go to the hall is for the memorial.
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Mystery
Welcome Walker.
You have a child. Do you really want to bring your child up with being scared of GOD KILLING him/her?
You go back.... so does your child. Are you willing to disown your child when they do research themselves and know how "untruth" it is.
Turn your back on your child because they dug deeper than you decided YOU wanted to.
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Hi All
by briman ini'm a born again christian, friends with dawn and was studying to be a pastor.
my brothers starting to become a jw and i'm looking for information to help me out.
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Mystery
STOP HIM!
all the advice i know.
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49
Why Depression Sucks.
by shamus inbecause you can make jokes and appear "happy" at the drop of a hat, meanwhile, you're being chewed up from the inside out.
because you can't learn to take one day at a time because your good days are always overshadowed by knowing that you're going to just slip back down again.
it's inevitable.
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Mystery
Shamus -
I joined the site you recommended. It is fantastic!!! Deborah seems to be a wonderful person!!!! She has personally emailed me several times.
I have found other parents going thru the same "helplessness" as I have. Thank you again for caring enough to give me insight on the forum you showed me.
You are a thoughful and wonderful person for helping me.
Faithfully yours,
deborah
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30
hi everyone
by blue eyes ini,m new to the site, my friend mouthy and i have knowen each for 37 years we lived in montreal ,now in ontario.i was a weak jw and she was sent to me to make me a strong one,i don,t know that it work, but we are good friends.and she is still helping me ,to get on this line.
i met some of you last week end at swiss chalet,hi gang.
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Mystery
Welcome Blue Eyes!!!
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11
Cult Status Covered Over By Blood & Why Ex's Seek To Infiltrate
by Englishman injust wondering how it is that ordinary folk tend not think of jw's as a cult like, say, the moonies.
consider what it is that makes ex's so virulently opposed to the watchtower society that joe public doesn't even know about.
i'm talking about disfellowshipping and disassociation here, the way in which families are split, loved one's abandoned and friends made into enemies.
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Mystery
You are absolutely correct in my experience with asking others what they know about JW's. I just received a very lengthy email from a very dear friend, whose only association with JW's was a friend he went to school with and with me (we met in college). He has been reading a lot on Social Psychology and was analyzing me regarding my "obsession" with being a JW and not being able to completely let it go. (Tell my mom & family - I will never go back).
We have been friends for many years; this is the first time he didn't give the same redudant answers to my raves, typical non-JW answers of someone that is "trying to understand". It is like a light bulb clicked on in his mind about what I have been talking to him about for so long. This was the first time he referred to it as a cult, comparing it to remarkable control Jim Jones had over the belivers that were part of the Jonestown massacre.
A portion of his email to me:
...one of the biggest struggles you will ever have, putting that crap behind you, is removing the hook that was set to the bone by your parents. You brain associates that religion and its belief with your parents. The same folks that gave you like and raised you and loved you for all that time. In the deepest parts of your brain, you associate disowning that religion with disowning them......
What father or mother would put ANYTHING over the love for their children? What father or mother would ever allow a single hair to be harmed on their child?s head?
I'm not suggesting that they don't love you, but they are putting that cult ahead of their love for you and that is F...ED UP! period! no way other than that to look at it.
What makes it so painful is that you probably do what I and every other person on the face of the planet does. No matter how good or bad or down right evil a persons parents may be, we, as kids, will spend the rest of our lives seeking their approval.
An opinion of an outsider looking in at JW's. Once they get past the holiday and bood issues.
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27
Welcome, Andy, he doesn't bite.
by FlyingHighNow inandy has joined jwd .
i thought i would introduce him to you.
his nickname is shaft.
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Mystery
Welcome Andy!!!
Join the land of the living.
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49
Why Depression Sucks.
by shamus inbecause you can make jokes and appear "happy" at the drop of a hat, meanwhile, you're being chewed up from the inside out.
because you can't learn to take one day at a time because your good days are always overshadowed by knowing that you're going to just slip back down again.
it's inevitable.
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Mystery
KJ -
I don't know how old your brother is but I have the book "The Bipolar Child" author: Demitri Papolos, MD & Janice Papolos. It has help me in understanding what bi-polar is and how it mentally affects a person. Learning about the actual functioning of 'my sons brain' has helped me in learning how to deal with his behavior. You and your mom & dad may want to read it.
PM me if you would like. I have been going thru this in a large way for the past 1 1/2 years when it manifested into being out of control. I may not be able to help, but i know how to listen.
take care,
deborah