OH and I can't resist, have to post this song as well... hahaha, this has been my favorite song the first year after I got DF'd
Bruja-del-Sol
JoinedPosts by Bruja-del-Sol
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20
Interview with an apostate: Bruja-del-Sol
by Bruja-del-Sol intell us a little about yourself and your family.. im a 45 year old female.
married age 18 to another jw (pos son), became the mother of two wonderful children, girl and boy (now adults), divorced and dfd when i was 33 years old and since 2008 married to my first love who used to be my classmate when i was 16 (but got kicked out of my life by my dad b/c he wasnt a jw).. were you a born in or a convert?.
my grandmother from fathers side, my parents, 2 of my 3 sisters and their husbands (one is an elder) and kids, my brother and his wife and children, and the wifes of my two uncles are all still jw (uncles both have faded, but their cult personas are still intact, unfortunately).
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Interview with an apostate: Bruja-del-Sol
by Bruja-del-Sol intell us a little about yourself and your family.. im a 45 year old female.
married age 18 to another jw (pos son), became the mother of two wonderful children, girl and boy (now adults), divorced and dfd when i was 33 years old and since 2008 married to my first love who used to be my classmate when i was 16 (but got kicked out of my life by my dad b/c he wasnt a jw).. were you a born in or a convert?.
my grandmother from fathers side, my parents, 2 of my 3 sisters and their husbands (one is an elder) and kids, my brother and his wife and children, and the wifes of my two uncles are all still jw (uncles both have faded, but their cult personas are still intact, unfortunately).
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Bruja-del-Sol
Thank you all so very much for your responses!
@Gorby: yup, another one to join the Dutch forces on JWN
@Xanthippe: thank you in return, nice of you to write a reaction.
@DeWandelaar: thanks for the compliment. I had some education: primary school (lagere school) and secundary school (HAVO). But the foundation for my English came from the Beatles... Age 6 I started to really love their music and my father translated a lot of their songs for me, so that I knew what they sang. Isn't it great, having learned a language from such 'demonic' music?
@Gypsy Sam: thank you, glad you liked it. And yes, my life in Spain is sometimes very idyllic (at the moment it's just plain cold and wet.... but this evening just before sunset we saw the most beautiful huge and very wide rainbow... Nature at its best!)
@TheOldHippie: I'm not exactly sure what you mean? Any specific part of my story?
@Punkofnice: thank you, that's exactly why I've written it, since I enjoy the stories of others very much also.@Humbled: I can understand you so well. I've sent my grandmother a letter a few years ago. She did write me back, even sent a picture of herself (taken on the District Convention... of all places!), to tell me she couldn't meet me because of her conscience. Jehovah would disapprove... So sad, since I asked her if we could hug each other just once, for the last time, just being grandmother and granddaughter... But she couldn't. And even though it hurt, I could understand where she came from. So I haven't bothered her again. She'll be 90 this year and I fear the day that she'll die, since I still don't know what to do if her funeral day arrives... I can imagine it must feel somewhat the same for you and that old sister, to know she'll die one day, and not being able to ever hug her again. I'm so glad I had that chance with that old sister I took care of, I had no idea at the time that I would never get such a chance with my own grandmother.
@Innerpeace: So glad for you that you've found your soulmate. Is he the person you'd lost as a young girl? The Dixie Chicks recorded a song about this topic, called 'A home'. Good that you and I (and so many others, like LisaRose) eventually managed to build that home after all:
A Home -
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Feeling numb and alone
by DeWandelaar insince some time i post here on this forum... i am always willing to help people or to express my opinion if it helps someone.... i have already posted something about myself but i haven't told much about my history.. i am married with a nice wife and i have three kids (two of my own and a stephdaughter).
since a year i do not go to meetings and i unofficially stopped with the "truth".
i had a meeting with some elders expressing my concerns with the teachings and with the slave.
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Bruja-del-Sol
It's an old topic, but I just want to respond to it since I can relate to so many things DeWandelaar has said. My daughter was a very hyperactive girl. She could never sit still, she would always run instead of walk, misbehave when you asked her to behave. One time at a Circuit Assembly a 'sister' on the row before us turned around, grabbed my daughter in her neck and angrily whispered "you sit still NOW and be quiet!!!" I was furious and so I told her. Who the h*ll did that woman think she was??? Did she have any idea how difficult it was for us as parents to keep our daughter as silent as possible? My daughter was only 4 years old at the time! She looked at me with big scared eyes and started crying. I hated that woman who had the guts to do this to my baby!
This memory just came up while reading DeWandelaar's story.
Not long after that incident I went to our doctor with my daughter and told him I wanted to see a homeopathic doctor. I described the problems with her and said that I believed this had something to do with her body being out of balance. The doctor wanted to send her to a psychologist instead, but I refused that and insisted on the homeopathic doctor. He then sent her to such a doctor in our area.
Within fifteen minutes that doctor found out my daughter was allergic to sugar! She had a very strong reaction with hyperactivity from it, combined with pure rage every once in a while. Our unknown mistake was that we tried to keep her silent and sitting still during the meetings by giving her sweets! We've tested it later at home (after the diagnosis by the doctor) and clocked the amount of time from swallowing until her body started to respond: exactly fifteen minutes! The look in her eyes would change and she would go mad, wild, and definitely unable to sit quietly in a Kingdom Hall.
That homeopathic doctor treated her for two years. She went on a sugarless diet (horrible, since sugar is in EVERYTHING!) and wasn't allowed to eat chocolate as well. Withing a month the changes in her were already tremendous! Even the kindergarten teacher came to me asking what we had done to her, since it appeared as if a totally new girl had come into the class!
Years later, when she was 19 she also was diagnosed ADD... and that's when I learned I have ADD myself as well. Suddenly I understood a lot about myself and I've been able to see it as an extra asset instead of a handicap. My daughter has been able to do the same, she's actually very happy with her ADD. And even though she is 25 now, I still can tell when she's had too much sugar... it's just that wild look in her eyes that gives it away! She'll always be my little monster hahaha.
The last couple of years I've learned a lot about hyperactive children and it was meantioned by some others who responded on this topic, that it's very often that hyperactive children need more challenge. They might be high-sensitive and need more attention, they're usually very bright and willing to learn (and also capable of learning new things very quick). It's also important to communicate more with those types of children, since they have often more trouble understanding the world they're living in. Explain to them why things are the way they are, why people do certain things, why you as a parents act in a particular way and why you expect certain things of them. If you're able to make them understand, without threats, punishment or getting angry, just be their loving parent and inform them, teach them what it is to live the human life... then very often they will understand and become calmer (but not always... of course!).
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If You Got a Call or Visit From The Elders How Would You Deal With Them?
by minimus injust curious..
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Bruja-del-Sol
LuckilyI moved to another country, but let's just assume that I would still be in Holland in the area where I got DF'd... if they would call me, I would ask them which part of the letter I gave them in 2004, where I stated that I will NEVER come back and be a JW again, they didn't understand. I would tell them that everything written in that letter is still up to date. So stay away from me, permanently!
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So what are you up to?
by Xanthippe inanyone else bored with religion versus atheism or is it just me?.
i'm planning to go to greece in may.. i'm thinking about planting rocket and beetroot in my garden this year because they are getting rather expensive to buy.. this week i want to make chocolate refridgerator cakes.
some for my daughter who is coming home from uni this weekend and some to take in to work to give away with free tea and coffee because it's national libraries day on saturday.. i just finished reading the humans by matt haig which was brilliant.
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Bruja-del-Sol
Frazz, thanks for the tip! I've already read so many books about Henry VIII and Anne Boleyn, also about Elizabeth I, but I hadn't heard of this title yet. I understand it's part of a (planned) trilogy. I'm going to look for it in the English bookstore, sounds like a great read (according to Wikipedia).
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So what are you up to?
by Xanthippe inanyone else bored with religion versus atheism or is it just me?.
i'm planning to go to greece in may.. i'm thinking about planting rocket and beetroot in my garden this year because they are getting rather expensive to buy.. this week i want to make chocolate refridgerator cakes.
some for my daughter who is coming home from uni this weekend and some to take in to work to give away with free tea and coffee because it's national libraries day on saturday.. i just finished reading the humans by matt haig which was brilliant.
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Bruja-del-Sol
And I'm not afraid to talk about witchcraft, although I don't want to scare people away (like JW's with doubts about the WTS who end up on JWN). I wouldn't want people to point at JWN with the idea that it's full of apostates and witches...
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So what are you up to?
by Xanthippe inanyone else bored with religion versus atheism or is it just me?.
i'm planning to go to greece in may.. i'm thinking about planting rocket and beetroot in my garden this year because they are getting rather expensive to buy.. this week i want to make chocolate refridgerator cakes.
some for my daughter who is coming home from uni this weekend and some to take in to work to give away with free tea and coffee because it's national libraries day on saturday.. i just finished reading the humans by matt haig which was brilliant.
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Bruja-del-Sol
Nice question: so what am I up to?
Every other day I have to sieve four liters of water kefir (if anybody ever wants some kefirgrains let me know, PM your postal address and I'll send you some in an envelope, b/c my kefirgrains are growing soooo extremely fast and I don't like the idea of throwing them away, so I dry 'em to share with other people).
Every day I also sieve milk kefir, but those grains don't grow that fast yet. Milk kefir is really delicious, I've just started two weeks ago but I'm planning on making mozzarella and yoghurt from it.
At the moment it's raining, but as soon as it's dry and sunny again I'm outside working on our mosquito net that I'm sewing myself to keep our porch free of bugs and bees.
I'm planning to visit my children and some friends in Holland in May. Haven't seen my daughter since last April and I miss her!
And talking about chocolate refridgerator cake... I need to bake some new bread today. I like to do that and it tastes a lot better than the bread from the supermarket.
While writing this posting, I sit on an armchair wih my laptop on my lap, and the cat is laying on my belly as she always does, completely stretched with her head against my shoulder... her favorite position, and she's snoring very hard as usual
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Interview with an apostate: Bruja-del-Sol
by Bruja-del-Sol intell us a little about yourself and your family.. im a 45 year old female.
married age 18 to another jw (pos son), became the mother of two wonderful children, girl and boy (now adults), divorced and dfd when i was 33 years old and since 2008 married to my first love who used to be my classmate when i was 16 (but got kicked out of my life by my dad b/c he wasnt a jw).. were you a born in or a convert?.
my grandmother from fathers side, my parents, 2 of my 3 sisters and their husbands (one is an elder) and kids, my brother and his wife and children, and the wifes of my two uncles are all still jw (uncles both have faded, but their cult personas are still intact, unfortunately).
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Bruja-del-Sol
@LisaRose: I can understand how frustrating it must have been being married with someone so dependent on you... I remember when I just moved out that my ex called me several times. To ask how to wash the laundry and if certain things could be put together in the same turn, how long to cook the potatoes, things like that... he knew nothing, he'd never done anything in the house except for some vacuuming and folding towels every now and then.
And complaining... someone told me a couple of years ago that the worst and most contagious disease on the planet is complaining. He told me to 'get away as fast as lightning when people start complaining and blaming everybody but themselves for all that is wrong in their lives!' (the man I lived with after my divorce was a huge complainer also, no wonder it lasted only little less than a year!). So I'm glad you did the right thing and found yourself a better husband!
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Interview with an apostate: Bruja-del-Sol
by Bruja-del-Sol intell us a little about yourself and your family.. im a 45 year old female.
married age 18 to another jw (pos son), became the mother of two wonderful children, girl and boy (now adults), divorced and dfd when i was 33 years old and since 2008 married to my first love who used to be my classmate when i was 16 (but got kicked out of my life by my dad b/c he wasnt a jw).. were you a born in or a convert?.
my grandmother from fathers side, my parents, 2 of my 3 sisters and their husbands (one is an elder) and kids, my brother and his wife and children, and the wifes of my two uncles are all still jw (uncles both have faded, but their cult personas are still intact, unfortunately).
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Bruja-del-Sol
@Valkyrie: You might be right about those elders, although they didn't stand a chance since her testament was already made and no way she would have changed it. Besides, they probably would've been very disappointed, because she owned nothing but a lot of old furniture, no antique, and little money. And she was aware that some people gave their inheritance to the WTS, but she explicitely told us that she didn't want that to happen. I still have the little notes she had stuck on the backs of her furniture... She had told me exactly what she wanted to happen with it. She was such a special person... gosh do I miss her! I also own all her pictures. Mostly pictures of the 50's and 60's showing her in field service, at assemblies, in drama's, in the kitchen at assemblies etc. Maybe I'll post some of it someday...
And thank you very much for the compliments on my English. I just love that language!
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Interview with an apostate: Bruja-del-Sol
by Bruja-del-Sol intell us a little about yourself and your family.. im a 45 year old female.
married age 18 to another jw (pos son), became the mother of two wonderful children, girl and boy (now adults), divorced and dfd when i was 33 years old and since 2008 married to my first love who used to be my classmate when i was 16 (but got kicked out of my life by my dad b/c he wasnt a jw).. were you a born in or a convert?.
my grandmother from fathers side, my parents, 2 of my 3 sisters and their husbands (one is an elder) and kids, my brother and his wife and children, and the wifes of my two uncles are all still jw (uncles both have faded, but their cult personas are still intact, unfortunately).
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Bruja-del-Sol
Thank you so much Clarity and Alphaman!