PE,
I think this is really good advice. In reality it's not as black and white as this because everyone's circumstances are different. For our family it was a combination of both, and in addition we had close family bonds with Jewish family that did not shun us just because we joined a cult.
Our story in brief, it's all over the internet anyway. Family of four. Domestic violence. Reported to elders. Elders told victims not to go to the police. Elder denied this two weeks later. Wife and children still exposing the DV to some trusted ones in the cong. Husband living outside family home. Only a few members of cong knew. Children did not want father back home. No options for scriptural divorce. Custody battle. Wife and children still exposing DV.
Wife df'd for exposing DV, son removed from being a publisher for exposing DV. Both accused of reviling or some such. Daughter baptised, ran away from city to Jewish family. Still attending meetings. Daughter confused because she is told she can't have contact with Df'd mum. Daughter fades. Wife and kids wake up.
My daughter still has contact with JWs. But she it totally awake now. She has a new circle of friends. she doesn't like lying to her JW friends about her disbelief. She isn't really interested in having close bonds with JWs, They have nothing in common. She was invited to a wedding after she left but the KH only. Only very few shun her, some of her friends have left and woken up too.
My son stopped all association with his friends, he was shunned a little for being removed, wasn't allowed to preach and stopped attending meetings when he woke up. He socialises with his school friends.
PE your advice is really good though. If I could go back I probably wouldn't have tried to expose the DV. I would have faked it for a while until I built a circle of friends, and then left WT. If I did it that way I probably wouldn't have lost custody of my son, or got Df'd.
- cantleave