This is one of the things that always irritated me as a "loyal" dub. Why do they think that the "congregtion has the right or authority to dictate one personal; affairs?
I remember many years ago some meddlesome elders at my sisters wedding reception (for which I was footing the bill) attempting to dictate what we could or couldn't do. I politely informed them that I was an elder too, that this was my party, and to keep their opinions to themselves. One elder was politely informed that he had three seconds to vacate my party or he would be very embarrased when the police came to remove him. Oh what a stink that caused, but we survived anyway.
Control, control, control. That's what it's all about.