from the notes of "incognita".......... saturdays talk, return to the shepherd of your souls, was basically a 20 minute talk applied to those who've drifted or are drifting away; the basic jist was that we're all losers and that we'd better get reactivated and have a renewed vitality for the truth because without it, directly quoting "incognita", "our life is empty and meaningless and we'll have no joy".. inactive ones need the help of the elders because we're sinners and have lost our love for gee-hobah.
(so much for them not being able to read hearts.
) we have simply lost our zeal, and got carried away with the anxieties of life.
'YOU ARE TO GIVE THESE ONES A WARM WELCOME WHEN THEY COME BACK TO THE HALL"
A far cry from the counsel that was given to the elders back in the late 80's early 90's. My elder father was told that he was to confront anyone who came into the kingDUMB hall with these exact words "What are your intentions here?" Yup, I kid you not. It kept me scared S#!Tless from coming back to meetings for the longet time. So, whats the difference now, they are DESPERATE to bring their numbers up is all.
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a few times me and my family have had it out about the cult,and my parents{especially my mom}who are now 50,get all craxzy sometimes.she almost acts like she's physically sick,or haveing a heart attack or something when things get heated.now i understand sheis emotional to begin with,thats what got her into this crap .but is all these factors a reason to hold back feelings?i often find myself tip-toeing around how i talk to her.i feel the fanatic state they kept thier kids(especially us o0lder 3 of 5}really had detrimental effects on us.it's not so much of what they believed,but how they held us kids back from normal growth.i don't want to make her feel terrible,but sometimes it's hard not to say things.she still clings to her meeting on sunday,and basic principlkes of the bible,but i at times feel betrayed because of her cntinuing to support that reloigion.i guess you just have to take it as comes.has this happened to anyone else?sometimes i care,sometimes i don't.i want my parents to know exactly how wrong the way they raised me was.i guess it was worse because i was so trusting.at a few times in my life,i actually beli9eved.when the rug got pulled out for me,i was left emotionally scarred.it is very difficult for me to forgive and forget.it's just the more you think about how ridicoulous there way of raising children was,the more angry i get.. its my little brothers 21 birthday tonight,and we are all going out to eat and have a few drinks{but it's not a birthday party}.i couldn't do crap in all my childhood.they taught me to hate.they used warped scare tactics on young children.they held me back socially in everyway.they caused,thru that cult,soooooo much pain,that still lingers today.will i ever truly forgive and forget,i dont think so,but thier age may spare them my full disdain.its a fine line i tread with my parents,one between love and hate.. should age matter when it comes to confronting people on this subject,one that runs deep for many of us children of the watchtowers 1980's /early 90's pinnacle of fanatisism?stp
I just had this exact talk with my father age 61. I referenced alot of the stuff you refer to, how we missed out on normal growth, how we had to do things based on fear, how my parents put the cult before us growing up, and now they continue to put it before their grandchildren. My df'd sis and I had a four hour talk with my elder dad, who has heart problems, high blood pressure the most severe case of asthma, and diabetes. So I know exactly what you mean, it is a hard thing to do, because you are worried about their health and how the stress of the conversation may cause a physical reaction (which I think it may have, my sis noticed my dads lip tighten and his breathing get stressed, I thought it was from him being upset, but she thought it was his asthma acting up).
Anyhow, after all that, I would still do this conversation again, and I dont think you should feel bad for having this talk with your mother when you feel you need to regardless of her age (which 50, shish, that aint old at all). It is a very important part of our healing process, to be able to confront our parents with the reality of what this cult has done to us.
treat you as they use to ?
im df'd and i have a family member who will still go to the bar with me, come to my house and hang out with me, but in certain situations, he wont because the witnesses may may see.
places like restaurants where the witnesses frequently go, it wont happen.
I was trying (like a dummy) there for a while to get my family together, (parents are in the truth, some siblings are, some are not, my sister is df'd). It worked a couple of times, when I had them over to my house. But when my parents anniversary came up recently, I really wanted to go to a restaurant instead. I was tired and just didnt want to do the cooking or cleaning. Then I had the whole thing explained to me by my mother ad brother. What it boiled down to was, "somebody may see them associating with a df'd person" Although on the one hand, I am glad at this point in time, they have bent a little on the associating with my sis behind closed doors, but on the other hand, it is just a little hypocritical to me that the only reason they wont do it in public is because someone may see them.
would you go to a funeral at a kingdom hall?
would it have to be someone that is very close family or just an acquaintance?.
i dont know that jw funerals really off ther much closer and point blank i can not think of a single person i would go to the hall for.
I made the mistake of doing that a very very long time ago. A witness who was at one time close to our family, but someone I hadn't see in ages died. The experience was so miserable and humilitating for me, I got the most awful migraine headache, you know looks, snares comments... I promised myself never ever again. Since then, my mom has tried, when different ones pass away, to guilt me into it. And NOPE, I won't put myself through it, I have way more self esteem than that now, I refuse to be humiliated, or to go through the sick feeling I know I will get. Of course, the only exception to this would be if either of my parents, or one of my siblings passed away, then of course I would. Otherwise, not gonna touch it with a ten foot pole.
they are adding a second floor to this hall that they have had for at least 40 years.
in gunhill rd bronx new york city.
i started by asking dumb questions .
Good God Johnny, this is some really really good stuff. GOOD for you, you really let them have it. You did something that alot of people here probably fantasize about doing.
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check this out.. http://gamefiles.blueyonder.co.uk/blueyondergames/trailers/rofl.starwars.nerds.wmv.
purps
OMG, too too funny! I Cant wait to show my husband, he is one of those 35 year old star wars nerds.
new to the forum & simply introducing myself.
i've enjoyed reading some of the posts here.
it is so nice to know these forums exist for poor ex-jw girls that suffer from post tramatic sheltered-from-the-rest-of-the-free-world syndrome.
a grown woman fearing demonic forces, armaggedon coming, and so on and so fourth
I know exactly what you mean. You are not alone. Welcome!
my daughter lily is 3 years old.
she is now asking me all the body parts(all of them).
now i am not one to hold back so i told her what she has and what her little brother has when she asked.. so anyway..... now she sings songs about it.
WHen my nephew was no more than 2 years of age, I was holding him as my sister and I walked out of a grocery store. There was a very loud emergency vehicle going by, lights and sirens blaring. He turns around and looks and says "What the FU($ is that?" I almost dropped him, I laughed so hard.
1. go out to lunch at every session.
bring back bags of fast food that say "burger king".
or "mcdonalds" on them.
OMG, Metatron and Evilforce, STOP IT! I am at work here you know, trying to laugh silently, and its not working! I'm starting to tear up! THis is way to friggin hilarious...
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outaservice (enquiring minds want to know)
You dare ask a question!! This is apostate thinking! Remember we must avoid the snare of independent thinking.
