Why Christianity is all about judgement!

by free2beme 29 Replies latest jw friends

  • free2beme
    free2beme

    This joke was written by the comedian Emo Phillips. What makes it funny is that it captures Christianity to the exact point we all should know. Enjoy ...

    Voted the funniest religious joke of all time

    I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump. I ran over and said: "Stop. Don't do it."

    "Why shouldn't I?" he asked.

    "Well, there's so much to live for!"

    "Like what?"

    "Are you religious?"

    He said, "Yes."

    I said, "Me too. Are you Christian or Buddhist?"

    "Christian."

    "Me too. Are you Catholic or Protestant?"

    "Protestant."

    "Me too. Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?"

    "Baptist."

    "Wow. Me too. Are you Baptist Church of God or Baptist Church of the Lord?"

    "Baptist Church of God."

    "Me too. Are you original Baptist Church of God, or are you Reformed Baptist Church of God?"

    "Reformed Baptist Church of God."

    "Me too. Are you Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1879, or Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915?"

    He said: "Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915."

    I said: "Die, heretic scum," and pushed him off.

    Summary

    Isn't that so true, no matter what sect of Christianity your in, you always think the other sects are wrong and worthy of death. I always find that the best way to judge if a Christian is trustworthy, is to ask this question ...

    "Does your religion feel that non-believers are subject to some form of Judgement?"

    If they say no, and go into all sorts of "all faiths are different" and "it is about what you accept" speech. Then they are not trustworthy, as all Christianity, no matter what sect you hold to be true, is about a form of judgement on the non-believer. To say otherwise, is to try and form your conscience to accept something that is simply not the case and not true. So if your Christian and belong to the Neighborhood Christian Church, and walk up to a guy on a bridge who belongs to the Christian Fellowship Church, push him off and do god's bidding and free of the world of another heretic.

  • tetrapod.sapien
    tetrapod.sapien

    LOL, nice one!

    "Does your religion feel that non-believers are subject to some form of Judgement?"

    no, not at all! everyone is going to the same place when we die: no where.

    :) - ahhh, it's nice to be a human...

    TS

  • Cognitive_Dissident
    Cognitive_Dissident

    that's fantastic. Wraps it up very nicely.

    no, not at all! everyone is going to the same place when we die: no where.

    Tetra, that reminds me of a good Tom Waits lyric:

    What does it matter, a dream of love
    Or a dream of lies
    We're all gonna be in the same place
    When we die
    Your spirit don't leave knowing
    Your face or your name
    And the wind through your bones
    Is all that remains
    And we're all gonna be
    We're all gonna be
    Just dirt in the ground

    from the song Dirt in the Ground

  • tetrapod.sapien
    tetrapod.sapien

    i love tom waits, i have all his albums...

  • Cognitive_Dissident
    Cognitive_Dissident

    yeah, he's consistently the one that I listen to most on a regular basis

  • ozziepost
    ozziepost

    free:

    So if your Christian and belong to the Neighborhood Christian Church, and walk up to a guy on a bridge who belongs to the Christian Fellowship Church, push him off and do god's bidding and free of the world of another heretic

    dunno wher you've been, I've never come across that.

    Did you hear that from outside or was it your experience?

    BTW your thread title has got it wrong too, christianity is not about judgment, more like salvation and love.

    Try it.

  • JeffT
    JeffT

    Do you know any Christians? Do you talk to them about what they believe?

    Have you ever been to a Christian church?

    This tasteless and ignorant joke may feed your prejudices, but don't mistake it for the real world.

  • free2beme
    free2beme
    BTW your thread title has got it wrong too, christianity is not about judgment, more like salvation and love

    Tried it, learned that was just the fancy slogan to get you in and then it is "judgement, judgement and more judgement."

  • ozziepost
    ozziepost
    learned that was just the fancy slogan to get you in and then it is "judgement, judgement and more judgement

    I'm very sorry to 'hear' that. It certainly isn't my experience and I've fellowshipped in churches in Australia, Europe and Scandinavia, oh, and the UK too.

    Dowunder I regularly attend large gatherings and the church or denomination that people 'belong' to is never mentioned.

    Try this too: last Sunday I was leading a church service in an Anglican church assisted by a Baptist pastor. It really made no difference to us as to what our prefernce for worship was, and that's what denominations means in practice; it's a matter of form rather than substance.

    I've preached on Judgment and it was considered a rarity as well as a difficult topic to handle, but it's definitely not a matter of "jedgment, judgment, judgment".

  • ozziepost
    ozziepost

    JeffT:

    Often people believe what they want to believe!

    Take the scenario of what is spoken amongst the dubs.The many lies spoken about christian churches from the platforms in Kiongdom Halls are readily accepted by the braindead R&F because they want to believe what they hear, it's convenient for them.

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