I have a question or an issue if you will..........
This is about a friend, that I used to have. Now this has been all recent......
Well when I meet him, and his wife, we became friends. I was always inviting him, and his wife to our house(because we have children and no baby sitters), and I making a meal, or ordering out. I had a great time with them, and so did my husband. His wife was the first real "girl" friend I had since I left the cult. Basically, we all got along, and enjoyed each others company.
I spent time on the phone with him, listening to all his problems, or just to chit chat. E-mailing each other. Having deep conversations with him, telling him my personal stories, and what not.
Well him, and his wife divorced. It was a complete Shock! My husband, and I couldn't believe it. We didn't hear from them in awhile. We were very busy with all my hospital visits. I just about a week after I got home from the hospital, from my 3rd surgery. We got a phone call from him. He said to my husband " I just want to tell you before you heard from anyone else, that her and I are getting a divorce". Needless to say my husband was stunned. He went on about 5 minutes telling him he has changed, and he isn't the marrying type. The he abruptly got off the phone with my husband, saying he was leaving for the bar.
I gave it 2 weeks before I called her. Plus, I waited because I was in a great deal of pain still, and I was still very tired. Well I called her up. We talked for about 2 hours. She cried a bit said it was mutual decision. He changed, and wasn't the same person anymore. Well I cheered her up. Telling her we are going on a trip just the 2 of us. Now her, and I are great friends. We go out shopping, and do stuff all the time. I really like her as a friend. I didn't forget her husband though.
However, then she started dating my brother in-law. Again, shocked, but happy for both of them. So, I didn't call her Ex up for awhile, and feeling really guilty about it. I just didn't know what to say. I felt kind of awkward. I asked how he was doing when I spoke to her. I then heard from him in a e-mail. He didn't sound like himself. He didn't know about her dating, and I wasn't the one who was going to say anything. I cared about his well being, but I knew he wasn't in a happy place, and wanted to be left alone. So, I left him alone. After awhile, I found out that he knew about his Ex, and my brother in-law, and he wasn't happy.
Well, anyway he posted saying good bye to everyone. I replied saying that he is missed, and to check in from time to time to know he is alright. Well, he then e-mailed me saying that I need to put myself in his shoes, and consider how he feels about us. I am thinking US? Well, now I didn't do anything. What she does is none of my business, and I am not involved in their marriage or divorce. So told him(in a e-mail) that I had nothing to do with this....and I shouldn't be treated like I fixed them up. Even if I did ...he still made the choice of leaving her, and moving on. What is she supposed to to do sit, and home and wait for him? Then, I ended my e-mail asking him if she was dating someone else would he still treat me this way. He then replied later...Telling me not to respond back, because he will not be checking it anyway, and saying how he now knows who his friends are, and who they are not. Also, he doesn't consider me to be his friend anymore(and my husband).
I think that is Bulls**t! I shouldn't be treated this way. I guess in all honesty he never was my friend anyway. He probably doesn't know what that means. I think he needs to grow up. I know that it must be really hard to even speak to me since of the connection now. However, I shouldn't be treated poorly.
Do you I am the bad person? Or, have I done anything wrong?
Brooke