I just read about Puternut and it is very sad. He wrote some nice posts and was a nice guy. I think shunning is terrible.
But, most of us have been Witnesses at one time and trully believed that what the organization said and tried to be obedient even when it was very difficult. I don't think a person should judge his daughters or the rest of the family so harshly. I'm sure they are in world of pain right now.
Feel love and compassion for everyone, even the ones who have not gained the understanding we have. I think God is Unconditional love and Ary is at peace with God. I think God wants us to feel unconditional love for him and his family. Elizabeth Kubler Ross wrote that these kind of things help us to know the eternal lessons we are here to learn. And the greatest lesson we are here to learn is unconditional love. Even if the Watchtower doesn't preach it, at least we do know it. When we get away from the organization, then this knowledge does come from deep inside us if we learn to our innermost voice.
I think this is what Puternut would want us to know right now. I think he would want us to feel compassion for his family.
Peace, Demeter