It's not healthy for a grown man's brother to have that much power over him.
You must tell the truth. If he can't handle it, you won't be the first woman to have to mend a broken heart.
Please keep us posted.
relationships and relatives
by butalbee 25 Replies latest social relationships
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k_foxx
ablee- this is the first time that i have been to this site..most of my family are witnesses. this is my advice to you.. regardless of what his brother thinks of you and his brother..he needs to know..by leaving him in the dark, eventually it could get worse..besides, he needs to hear it from you, and not other co-workers. it will be his decision on how he will talk and deal with the situation with his brother.. if he is your best friend, which he sounds like a pretty good one, you need to work this out.. you shouldn't let someone come between the two of you like that causing malice..even if he is his brother..your best friend is 27..i'm pretty sure he can make up his own mind..
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butalbee
Today, my friend came up to me and said that we needed to talk. He told me that he thinks that there is more to this story than he's been told by me and his brother. He also said that he knows that I haven't been seeing anyone else, that he knows me better than that. He said he's had a lot of time to think about us(I haven't been taking the advice of anyone's post's, I haven't told him the truth about his brother), and that he doesn't want to lose me in his life, and that he misses the time we spend together. He asked me if I still felt the same way. Of course, I do, but I didn't tell him that, simply because I have had just as much time to think about us and maybe we don't belong together, maybe his brother is right to try to break us up. I am not a JW, and I really don't belong in his world. I mean could it really work anyway????? My sister tells me to follow my heart and stop thinking too much into this, but I don't know...We've been "friends" for what over 7 months and we are still technically "just friends", I haven't even kissed him--Is there something wrong with that? Okay, we do hug each other, but that's as close as we come physically. I guess, I'm just really bummed out about this whole mess, and I'm second guessing everything...Anyone got some words of wisdom for me?
P.S. I did tell him brother off, I was sick of the harassment from him while I was trying to work...He told me I was a bad influence on his brother, and that it's better this way...I told him to get the f**k out my life, and leave me alone, and that he was the bad influence in his brothers life, and that if he cared half as much as he claims to that he would more concerned in my friends happiness than who he finds happiness with. Of course I added more curse words than the above!!!!!
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butalbee
I MISS HIM TERRIBLY THOUGH.
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Eyebrow
What kind of place do you work at that his brother can come in and harrass you like that???
If you really think the world of this guy, show him some respect and tell him the complete truth. Maybe things will work out for you two, but maybe not. However, you are not being any more honest with him than his bastard brother is. How can he make a honest decision if he is being lied to by his brother and kept in the dark by you?
Hold your chin high and tell the truth. If you do not tell him the complete truth and he does end up with you, you will always have this hanging over your head.
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slipnslidemaster
Just for the record. A relationship with a "worldly" person and a Witness will not work. I say this for your protection. He will break your heart.
I feel for you and good luck.
Slipnslidemaster: "If you were plowing a field, which would you rather use? Two strong oxen or 1024 chickens?"
- Seymour Cray -
butalbee
Just thought I'd keep ya updated:
Since my last post things between us are excellent!!! It seems somehow that what his brother was trying to do{keep us apart} really brought us closer together. Closer than ever before, because this tested our relationship, it made us face our feeling for one another as not just a platonic relationship, but something much more. He knows me so well, and I love that about him, it's like he knows exactly what is on my mind, what I am thinking, before I say anything at all.A couple weeks ago he asked me out on a real date. We went to dinner and a movie and it was wonderful. But it made me nervous because for the first time "us" was more than just friends, and their was tension between us...especially when he brought me home, walking me to my door. He kissed me, and I swear I turned to jello...That was the best night of my life. And so far, so good.
But the demon brother still hates me, and the thought of us. I made the mistake of agreeing to going over to their house for dinner tonight. I know it's gonna become a night of hell, I just have a feeling...but I guess if somehow we are to make this work for the long run, that I have to get along with the brother, and he's gonna have to accept it...
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butalbee
Yep, dinner tonight at the brother's house was a nightmare! The big topic of this evening was why my friend has not been attending the meeting and what my intentions with him are. The brother commented while my friend and his sister in law were doing dishes that he thinks it's my influence that has prevented him from going to the meetings. I told him that Matt hardly went to begin with, and that I had nothing to do with it, actually I didn't even know he wasn't going tuesday anymore, since I work that night. The brother also asked if I plan on attending and that his wife has offered to do the bible study crap with me. Is he totally out of his mind??????????? His brother also said that if I plan to keep pursuing Matt that I need to think about this. And then he gave me a book called Isiah's prophecies. Okay, so now I am confused--I am the wicked witch in his brother's eyes, but now he's trying to convert me??????/
I showed the book to Matt, he made me laugh--he said, "oh yeah, that's supposed to be a really deep book, I haven't read it yet though!"
I am concerned why he hasn't been going to those meetings. He should go, it is who he is, and what he believes! I hope it has nothing to do with me. Or maybe his brother is trying to play mind games with us again.
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butalbee
Oh, and his brother asked me if We had any kind of sexual relations yet!! I practically choked on my dessert! Does kissing count as sex these days???????????? That's about it. I told him no. He thinks I'm lying, ofcourse.
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butalbee
Oh, and the brother said that he would sign me up for a subscription to the Watchtower magazine. Great!!!!!