How did you cope?

by Zico 31 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Lady Liberty

  Dear Zico,

  I understand your feelings! I was raised in the organization, and have been a loyal Witness all my life until this past year, after I began questioning things. If you have a chance read my story. Look it up under member directory, under topics, Entitled: It's high time I introduce myself". You will see what we (my husband and I) went through. Still to this day I cannot believe all that I trusted was a house of cards. I try to look at the things I do still believe in. I have, and am still going through each and every thing checking things out, and double checking them. Even though there is very little I still believe that was taught to me, and plenty I am not sure of, I just keep one thing in mind. That is , I may not have all the answers, but the organization doesn't either, thats why they have had to make things up, because they didn't know either!! Things I thought that had solid evidence for support, DON'T. So.. I just realise now, there are things we may NEVER know. But one thing I do know, is that Jehovah God expects us to worship him with "spirit and truth". And to do that he has given us his word. You see you don't have to "throw the baby out with the bath water". Try reading the Acts of the Apostles: Matthew, Mark, Luke and John. You will no doubt be comforted. I know it really helped me to see how simple it was to be approved by Jesus. And that it was not something you earned by your meeting/service attendance. That forgiveness of sins, and life everlasting is TRUELY a GIFT. And THAT is something no person can take from us!!! Still, there is quite alot of emotions involved when you have everything shattered. I completely understand. Most of us here do. Hang in there. Use this forum for "therapy".

  Sincerely,

  Lady Liberty
• 

  jwfacts

  I didnt cope. I spent 10 years fighting it and getting more and more down and frustrated. When I finally made the break and got d/f it was a huge relief. I now find life has more meaning and more happiness than ever, and my new friends are far more loyal.
  Take it slow and build up a new circle of friends to support you before you leave.
  BTW, you will never totally recover if your family are JWs as there will always be pain that they are victims and anger that they don't talk to you. That said, you will grow greatly as a person coming to terms with coping with the realities of life.
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  inquirer

  This is a bit off topic, but if the JW's didn't treat us like crap, we'd never know how bad it was -- unless you leave for doctrinal reasons. So I am glad they treated me like crap, it was a blessing in disguise! Funny thing with me, I prayed to God about everything, BUT NEVER PRAYED TO GOD IF THIS WAS THE RIGHT RELIGION!!!! How sad was that! I even had Mormons come around my door and THEY ASKED ME TO PRAY IF THEIR (MORMON) RELIGION WAS TRUE! HOW SAD IS THAT -- NEVER DID I PRAY REGARDING MY OWN RELIGION! God didn't tell me that the Mormon religion was true and I went to a couple of their meetings out of curiosity, because being new to Sydney, I never heard of this <expletive> before.
• 

  inquirer

  Even if something seemed true like what I thought about the JW's, YOU SHOULD ASK GOD. Just like you have people who help you with financing, mortgages, technical support for computers, Internet researching... -- Just like praying to God as an expert, ask the "trade" experts first!
• 

  MadamDefiance

  I was also mad as hell!!!! I was Dis-felowed of the KH at fifteen going sixteen.

  I lived at home for a short time with mom and step-father and I was pushed to attend the meetings with the family also. Being shunned and gosspied about while I was right there was breaking to my spirit and health.

  I ran away for two days.

  I got beat down my step-father did not spare the rod.

  I left home on my own to live with my granny.

  Coping with Worldly indiviuals was a difficult transformation in itself. But I have many new friends now

  I am 33 yrs old now and I have just began to enjoy my life.............
• 

  jw

  All Scripture is inspired of God and beneficial for teaching, for reproving, for setting things straight, for disciplining in righteousness,2 Timothy 3:16 9

  And this is what I continue praying, that YOUR love may abound yet more and more with accurate knowledge and full discernment; Philippians 1:8

  1 Faith is the assured expectation of things hoped for, the evident demonstration of realities though not beheld Hebrews 11:1

  30 and you must love Jehovah your God with your whole heart and with your whole soul and with your whole mind and with your whole strength.’ 31 The second is this, ‘You must love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.” Mark 12:30,31

  4 whose will is that all sorts of men should be saved and come to an accurate knowledge of truth. 1 Timothy 2:4

  This will bring faith in time!

  You don't need a church or congregation if you read the bible and pray for these things.
• 

  lilybird

  I was dealing with a lot of depression and feeling sick when I was attending meetings and trying to deal with field service.. It was such a relief when we finally decided to break away and be free from the organization..A major reason that I felt it was not god inspired organization was when they wanted to disfellowship my mother because she had mental illness...It wasn't' until I found this forum years later I realized all the lies the society teaches..Just knowing you have made the right decision and chosen freedom over living a life dictated by a cult makes it easier to begin a new life...free and independent thinking...
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  sass_my_frass

  It was rocky for a while, but I had my husband by me all the way, and he was my liberation. I suggest that you keep the people who will support you through it as close as you can. Besides that I'm deeply delighted at how life has started to shine since; the intellectual freedom, and the joy, is indescribable. It was a price I'd pay again if I had to, but I don't! I'm out, and truly grateful for the strength I found during the process.
• 

  Fe2O3Girl

  Itsallgoodnow has made a very good point:

  these questions aren't really your questions. These are JW questions, right out of JW watchtowers. These questions beg whatever answers the JWs think they can give you -- easy answers that serve to trap you in their cult.

  • The need to understand the purpose of life - is that a need or is that something the JWs made you think was a need?
  • The need to understand the real meanings of the bible - is that even possible? and again - isn't that just the way a cult approaches this sort of thing?
  • The need to know what your future holds - how in the world can anyone know for sure?

  The vast majority of those "worldly", i.e. normal, people that you have pitied weren't feeling lost and confused. They don't go through life wondering what the answer is any more than they wonder why they can't time travel or be invisible or fly, and they certainly weren't feeling devastated that one day, like everything that lives, they will die.

  The question is, why do YOU think that you have to have an answer to everything, and why did YOU need to believe you could live forever?

  My whole life belongs to the Society.

  This is the immediate problem. You need to fill out your life, quickly. Join clubs, start an evening course, volunteer. Discover how kind and caring the "worldly" are.

  Good Luck!!

  Rachel
• 

  geevee

  Hi again,
  
  Just another thought. The WTS would like you to think that if you leave the organization, your life will take a trip down the crapper. That anything you will do will not succeed, because as they see it Jehovah is not involved in your life, as when you leave the org, you leave him.
  
  Sure things happen that are not great, things can cause you stress, but our reply to JW's when they see us and ask how we are doing is this " Life is GOOD, infact it has never been BETTER!!" and that my friend is "The TRUTH".