It was devastating. I was so upset, I thought I was going to have a nervous breakdwon. The hardest part has been forgiving myself for allowing my self to be misled (how could I be so stupid) I wasn't raised one I became one around the age of 21-22. Then I had to tell my kids everythinkg I had taught them since birth was wrong. (they were 13 and 17) My son was batised and really belived it and my daugahter was working on getting baptised. My husband also had to be shown the way out. I would have to say my salvation was reading the bible. I decided the only thinng I knew for sure was there was a God. I had been misled by misinterpretation of the bible, why not read it for myself. In doing so I found my saviour Jesus Christ. He showed me the way. I don't belong to any organization anymore. Probably never will. I attend a non-denominational church, (I go when I feel like it some times more often some times less) It takes time to heal, time to forgive. I was so angry at first. It's been 4 years now. There is still some hurt and anger at those family/friends that shun us. I pray for them now...maybe they will find their way out. It is not an easy road. Beverly
How did you cope?
by Zico 31 Replies latest jw friends
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anewme
I was an elder's wife maybe 20 years when all of a sudden I started to become very impatient and angry at everyone. I was sad and I was angry. So I went through my health provider to speak to a therapist.
She was surprised when I started to share my angst-filled story with her. She said I had a very serious case of enmeshed personality disorder. That is, my own will was being crowded by my husband's and the Watchtower Society's. In one breath I would say how I felt, but that my feelings were improper because they disagreed with my husband's and were out of harmony with the Society's.
I wish I had a recording of those sessions. I would no doubt be disturbed to hear how trashed my soul was in those days. She recommended I separate myself from both husband and church and repair the damage to my mind by getting rest and concentrating on what I believed to be true and good for me.
My husband did not like it when I reported to him her counsel to me and called her an "enabler"....THE LICENSED THERAPIST AN ENABLER!
He recommended I call a doctor some bi-polar JW sister was seeing. I did and after a brief interview the doctor refused to take me as a patient. He said I was not organically sick.
Anyway, the exit was accomplished and I languished around for 3 years while I concerned myself with the real time day to day tasks of providing food and shelter for myself.
The real healing came with finding this forum and website.
In 9 months of being on this board I have exhausted myself and turned every stone with everyone else here to examine what we collectively endured and survived. I finally am at peace.
The world is going through so much pain and anguish and will go through much more. What is my little outcry over time spent in the Watchtower org but a mere stubbed toe compared to the outcry of pain in the world.
No, after all the wonderful discussions here I am finally at peace with God and the whole thing.
Anewme