Insensitive talk assignments

by Steve Lowry 38 Replies latest jw friends

  • Big Tex
    Big Tex
    I once was assigned a talk on masturbation when I was about fifteen or so

    Same here. Except you did a much better job at it than I did. Shortest talk I ever gave in the KM, I stammered, my face was hot and bright red; it was awful. Hated it and I was jeered at that hall mercilessly for weeks afterward.

  • minimus
    minimus

    I too gave that "masturbation talk". And I was a young teen but considered an excellent example----one who would never play with himself. When I was a School Overseer, I returned the favor to those I suspected were in similar situations. Perhaps they were dating or suspected of dating a "worldly" person, I'd assign them that talk. If I knew their was friction between 2 sisters, I'd assign them a talk together....What a bastard I was!

  • carla
    carla

    Min,

    Wouldn't putting the two women together be looked at as you trying to help them mend the fence? How wise you were to help these two sisters out. ick, I don't even like the term 'brothers' and 'sisters' due to the jw's.

  • minimus
    minimus

    I did try to help them out initially but putting two people together in that way wasn't right.

  • DanTheMan
    DanTheMan

    I remember a young bro who had to give the #2 talk, and that week it was Jeremiah 5:1-19. Here's verse 8:

    Horses seized with sexual heat, having [strong] testicles, they have become. They neigh each one to the wife of his companion.

    He was clearly embarrassed to have to read that, and I felt bad for him. He wasn't one of the Exemplary Youths™ in the hall anyway, but was gettting a lot of Encouragement™. But it was one of those things that made me think - the Ivory Towerists in Brooklyn, in their endlessly deluded minds, think that it's such a glorious privelege to be raised in Da Troof - I beg to differ.

  • Big Tex
    Big Tex
    When I was a School Overseer, I returned the favor to those I suspected were in similar situations. Perhaps they were dating or suspected of dating a "worldly" person, I'd assign them that talk. If I knew their was friction between 2 sisters, I'd assign them a talk together....What a bastard I was!

    Howdy Min. Listen, can I ask you a question? Just intellectual curiousity, I hope you know me well enough that I don't mean anything by this post.

    I've often wondered if that's why I was assigned that talk, even though I was Ricky Righteous and all, and there were other boys my age who were somewhat more ... experienced and it was well known (elders' sons ) what kind of guys they were and what I was. Between you, me and the Internet, funny enough, I was scrupulously "clean". At least at 15.

    So really, what's the mindset of the KM elder who assigns such a talk deliberately? I mean what is that elder trying to do? Are they trying to grnid the boy (or girl for that matter) down? Are they trying to make a point? And if so, what is the point? In all seriousness, are they trying to embarass the boy by giving him that particular talk? Why assign such a talk to one boy and not another?

    For the record, I was the assistant to the KM elder for 2 years. He was an arrogant, lazy SOB who couldn't be bothered with the menial task of assigning the talks, so he left that up to me. I was very careful, and I tried to be considerate (sometimes overly so) in who took what talk. I'd come up with the list and present it to him, and he'd give it his "blessing" and post it on the board as if he'd done all the work. Can't tell you how many times I had to give last minute talks when people would not bother showing up. At the same time I was assistant to the elder in charge of the literature and he was frankly worse. For a couple of years there, ages 16-18, I ran the Km and the literature, as well as assigning territories.

    Yep, nice guys finish last.

  • Honesty
    Honesty

    The reason the Watchtower has these 'talks' is because the Holy Spirit is nowhere to be found in their little cult.

    If He was present there would be no need for such things to be discussed.

    No wonder the jw's are so messed up in the head.

  • aniron
    aniron


    Yes , I'm sure we can all remember the "masturbation" talk from the YPA book, being given.

    I remember the brother given it was about 20 and had just got married. I was at the School overseers house when he came round for advice on how to give it. I recall that the overseer and I just couldn't keep a straight face and we were both in our late 30's. Saying things like "Be careful what gestures you use" or "Remember to say "masturbation" not the slang for it"

    We made such fun of it, and laughed so much, the guy was put at ease about it. We reckoned it was a stupid subject, to have a talk about. We all knew that 90% of males did it. As if one 5-6 minute talk was going to make those in the congregation stop. The overseer said it would probably make most of the young guys in the KH want to do it when they got home.

  • GentlyFeral
    GentlyFeral

    Hey, darth frosty,

    The last annoucement that was made, before he was invited to give his part, was the notice to the rest of the cong and him that his wife was disfellowshipped.

    That's beyond unbelievable. I mean, don't they have enough advance notice that they could have reassigned that talk? A couple days, even?

    I can't imagine that happening in any well-conducted KH. All the ones I ever went to, they'd as soon watch a couple doing the horizontal mambo onstage as listen to a disfellowshipped person say anything at all.

    gently feral

  • SirNose586
    SirNose586

    Oh man, that thing happened to me a year or so ago. There was a controversy over the videogame Halo (an M-rated first person shooter), because one parent was upset that it was introduced to his stepson and brought into his home. The parent's stepson was a friend of mine, but he had plenty of issues already, one being obsessive compulsive disorder. The parent was upset because his stepson would play Halo until like 5 in the morning everyday. Not too balanced, right?
    So this parent goes to the elders to complain. Meanwhile the stepson names everyone who played the game, which included me and some friends of mine. Now bear in mind, Halo didn't make me a bad person. I kept my hours up, my attendance constant, and my comments gleeful. No bad behaviour could be detected from me, as far as I could tell. I certainly avoided talking about the game at the meetings. My close friends and I gave no indication that this game was a problem to ANYONE's spirituality (at least in the WTS definition) until the stepson became involved and played it non-stop.
    They didn't approach me about it and take me upstairs, but the jerks DID assign me the "Why Violent Videogames Are Not For Christians" talk. Now, a lesser man would cop out from giving the talk. Not me. I made a carefully worded talk, and avoided outright lies. Heck, I even referenced an Awake article which mentioned certain games by name.
    Good, right? Not enough for our P.O., who was in charge of the main school. Here's the kicker: he went up and specifically called out Halo. My face burnt. You cannot mention anything specifically unless the Watchtower or Awake calls it out first! It's not allowed. You can't specifically warn against a particularly named source of entertainment. That destroys the "matter of conscience" outright. Of course, it didn't matter for Mr. Bethelite P.O. If he wanted to talk about it in private, that would be a different matter. Instead, he chose to make sure that he publicly shamed everyone who played the game, choosing for them what was right or wrong.
    And the best part of all, is comparatively speaking, Halo isn't all that violent. No hacked off limbs, no decaptitations, no buckets of blood. For most of the game you're killing aliens with purple blood. Even in multiplayer, a smattering of blood might come on the walls, but it's nowhere near as graphic as other games before it or after it. The language isn't bad either, nothing beyond 'hell' or possibly 'damn' coming from a Marine's mouth. If there were no blood stains, it could've gotten a T rating.
    A few months ago, my friend who still plays Halo was given the "Why Violent Videogames Are Not for Christians" talk. I helped him a lot. He was very nervous when he gave the talk, which is unusual. Again, he didn't say any outright lies. Mr. Bethelite P.O., after the talk, wished my friend could've called out Halo. Mr. P.O. had a list of games he wanted my friend to call out, and I'm not sure how many were previously called about by the Org. The P.O. didn't know my friend still plays Halo; this is because we have nothing to do with that troublesome stepson.

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