by The wanderer 44 Replies latest jw friends
I'm also with Parakeet on this one. Here, we have freedom of speech, and there is no one to tell you what you are thinking and saying is out of line with what the WTS teaches.
As far as the WTS is concerned, I will take what I was taught to the grave. How can you forget all of that? It is part of who I am, in one way or another.
Warlock
Sometimes I want to have amnesia and forget.
But that would mean forgetting all of my life until only barely a year ago.
I like what parakeet and lisavegas and warlock and others said about this is a place where we can empathize and have a common bond.
Wanderer,
I don't think these questions are unsettling at all, nor are the reasons people use this forum. Since my wife found this, it has become a part of her daily routine and I don't question it for the following reasons.
It is most definately group therapy and a very important support system for her and others raised as JW's.
Only those raised in WTS can truly understand it, so there is an undeniable bond.
The dynamic of a very healthy group support system like this is that you have a whole range of people with a whole range of experiences.
The next logical question is what about the older posters. Why would someone hang here after they have left WTS and are better mentally and post 5000 times. The answer is to help others who suffered like them. It is for all the right reasons and is a most admirable quality. They are doing very, very good work and helping many people. When people like noble wander on here by mistake, it helps everyone, because it reminds you of what a current WTS mind set is.
In other words its all good. The young, the old, the new posters, the old timers...you learn from everyone.
How can an individual be drilled 3 times a week at 5 meetings
a week including conventions, field service and the complete
Jehovah's Witness life style for years on end and—not be
affected for the rest of their lives?
EXACTLY - YOU HIT THE NAIL ON THE HEAD
However, if you could, get rid of the Watch-
tower and it did not live with you everyday, it begs the question: Why are you here then?
You must remember that many of us; if not most of us still have close family members in the org. Many of these family members still put enormous pressure on us. In this case, we are helped by having a "support group" where we can discuss these issues, vent our feelings, and get valuable research information.
For me, JWD is an excellent "one stop shop" info center where I can get latest news, inside information, research, web links, and even a shoulder to cry on once in a while.
You must remember wanderer, that leaving the JWs is very traumatic. Leaving this organization is not like leaving the Sierra Club, or the Rotary Club. It turns your life upside-down. There are many emotional factors to deal with; epsecially for those of us who are already prone to depression and other problems.
Does anyone ever really become absolutely free from this experience; to the point where they have forgotten about it? I don't know. Steven Hassan, who was a Moonie still talks and writes about his experiences even though he left the group 30 years ago.
Being a JW for most of us; was a pivotal experience in our lives. We don't just "get over it" overnight. The process of psychological seperation can take years. Just because some one is physically free from the org does not mean that they are emotionally free. This emotional freedom is a much deeper and complex issue which takes uniques twists and turns for different individuals.
Just because someone is an ex-JW does not mean that they should not have the need to be able to discuss it and exchange information regarding it's activities. This is a normal part of recovery. The time period inolved is different for each individual and cannot be timed or gauged according to an arbitrary timeline. It's an amorphous process.
Well, I never went through the WT "mill" but they still affect me every day.
***How can an individual ..... not be affected for the rest of their lives?***
BUT people rise above their pasts all the time. I believe we are the sum of ALL our experiences, good or bad. My violent ex-husband left his mark. It took me many years to get over him. Yet the marks remain. You could say, though, that I turned what was meant for evil in to good. These days I champion against abuse and manipulation of all kinds.
Are these the most unsettling questions you can come up with? I've got one better.
We need to watch that our love for this (DB) community does not supersede the needs of the individual poster. Even if someone comes in that is 'not of our kind', we must welcome their difference. Otherwise, how different are we from the 'exclusive' Watchtower society?
One stop shop....lol..I like that and so true. Not only can we get the lastest info in JWism, also the lastest info on any number of subjects. If you don't see what you want,...just ask for it.
lisa
I've noticed that several of the fine people here have used their experiences to help others find fredom. We all go through different trials in our lives. We can use those experiences to help others, or we can become imbittered and help no one.
I have found that those of you who have come out on the better side of the WTS, have been able to help those of us who know very little about what goes on behind their closed doors. You have helped many not only to find the strength to leave, but to open the eyes of loved ones who are still entagled in the mind control. Leaving the WTS is not for sissies, I have discovered that!
Since I am on the outside looking in, and have never been a JW, this forum has served to enlighten me and to help me open the minds of my JW friends. Your experiences are valuable, and I , for one, appreciate that so many of you have come out better, rather than bitter.
What is worse than having spent many years believing a lie? Believing a lie for one minute longer!
Your heros. You really are.
Wanderer,you are new here..You are still stuck in the JW way of thinking..That will pass and you will find the person you truely are..That being said,you are doing fine..You have much to learn and you are doing it in your own way..As we all have...OUTLAW
It eats at me all the time, in every thing I do, and sometimes I can forget for a little while, but it always comes sneaking back, even in my dreams, so I start reading and posting on this site to relieve my frustration and know that I am not alone.
r.
What he said. Plus, there have been several topics that affected me enough that I actually thought about it for several days, then never dug the post out. By that time, u had a new question. Plus, I am struggling with the sexual abuse. I thought I had gotten over it,.........also, I'm now dealing with my jw mom on a daily basis, almost. Before I moved, I wasn't.
I also believe I've made friends for life here. I come to see them.
I also believe in "paying it forward". There were people here for me when I joined, and needed their support. Without them, I know I would have committed suicide. I hope, in some small way, I can help someone else.
shelley
