My wife though struggles with exactly this issue especially with respects to family. I think she would like to know and for everyone else to know where we stand.
I 'played along' for three years, for just one basic reason. One person really. My cousin, who was [is?] my best friend for well over 30 years is still 'in'. His initial reaction to my dissident ideas about the organization was 'I will of course do whatever I have to do if you get DF'd.' Meaning that I would be 'shunned'. There has been growth on both sides now, though I felt an early urge to DA and refrained. In discussion with him last week he indicated that he didn't think that he would entirely shun me and throw 30 years out the window.
The interesting thing was, that during the conversation I began to recognise that my personal integrity was now based on my thinking and not on an organizations thinking any longer. His was still mired in organizational thought processes. That's when I knew it would be ok. He will have to be his own person of integrity or not, and I mine. If he comes to be unable to accept my integrity, then it is his loss.
I have been able, in that three years, to accept that my actions, when done in harmony with my correct motives, are insoluble of my person. If anyone chooses to remove friendship from me due to my actions of integrity, then it is that person who has failed to grow, not I.
Still, should he elect to 'shun' me, I will feel hurt a bit, but time will heal that rather quickly now I believe. My true hope is that he will at one point accept the facts I have provided him, and take a closer look too. My integrity of action should do nothing but impell good actions from him with time. So I take the loss, with the hope of a greater gain.
I do not suggest this is the right action for all. That would be folly, as each individual has circumstances that affect his/her decision. It was not the right time for me until three years after I learned 'the truth of the truth'. But it feels correct and postive today.
Jeff