You know Waiting,
posts like yours really make me fume. In all honesty I don't think the society will put those points into print, because i do not believe what that brother told you is the official "published" policy.
But I also believe that brother took away with him EXACTLY the point the society wanted him to take home.
1) The society will not put specific guidelines as far as dress into print any more. The skirt above the knee issue is well known, the same as a brother cannot wear a beard, but I don't believe it is so black and white anymore. Sisters i know just hate these remarks, and elders are often at a loss because their wives are wearing short skirts too. I would say this brother is just old school talking some liberties.
2) I understand the point of not pestering the elders for every minor detail. Many simply want to pick up the phone instead of reasoning on the matter. On the other hand, many elders seem to encourage this, also i think the society has contributed to it as well. The whole research thing is stupid anyway, because you are allowed to come to only one conclusion, the society's. Plus there are so many incompetent elders out there, and reducing the questions posed to these men, reduces the odds of embarassingly wrong answers and liability on their part for stupid advice.
3) Again, probably not the present stance of the society "in print" regarding DFed family members, but the stance they want you to take. Probably the brother strongly adviced the benefits of not talking to dfed family members in such a way that the audience would come to that conclusion.
anyways as always, I'm disgusted.
Path