"I would think that the Elders would be more oncerned that they enter a marriage that could run sour in a few years. Unbelievable!" It appears common sense isn't required for many things in dub-land.
Confused about the JW dating system
by Wendy_Warden 25 Replies latest social relationships
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undercover
I can't believe you lose spiritual standing for deciding you're in a bad relationship! I would think that the Elders would be more oncerned that they enter a marriage that could run sour in a few years.
They use the scripture that says "let your yes mean yes and your no, no" to show how important it is to fulfill the vow that both parties have taken.
No, they haven't taken the wedding vows yet, but they have vowed to vow is how they look at it.
That's why they make a big deal about not making a wedding decision lightly, as if you can't turn back from it...which in the JW belief system it is very difficult to break away from a marriage. What's ironic is that they make it difficult for a couple to get to know each other with their puritanical courting rules but then expect them to know full well what they're getting into when they agree to marry.
Now that I'm older and have seen many JW marriages fall apart, I can say that from my point of view it was partly because of the "dating" rules that are in place where young JWs are passionately inflamed and can find relief only by getting married. Once the flame of passion wears off and they find out they're married for life, things start to unravel and eventually major problems ensue. Since d-i-v-o-r-c-e (cue up Tammy Wynette) is a dirty word to JWs, a lot of couples end up in a dreadful, sometimes hateful relationship with no way out.
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new boy
There is NO sex before marriage...............and some times very little after.
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Wordly Andre
From my family history, date and then marry the first person the elders approve, then it always ends in divorce, just ask both my sisters, 1 brother, and more than a few cousins.
Something is wrong with their dating rules!!! -
Wendy_Warden
There is NO sex before marriage...............and some times very little after.
Very little after? I don't understand, why would there be little afterward? Is it because of their policing of the bedroom?
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Highlander
There is NO sex before marriage...............and some times very little after.
Very little after? I don't understand, why would there be little afterward? Is it because of their policing of the bedroom?Often time, because of the 'unofficial' dating rules, the 'dating couple' are not able to get to know eachother properly before making the decision to marry. Then later, they realize that they are married to someone they are not compatible with and that results in very little or no sex after marriage.
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New Worldly Translation
There is NO sex before marriage...............and some times very little after.
Very little after? I don't understand, why would there be little afterward? Is it because of their policing of the bedroom?As well as the sensible reasons from highlander it's also a clever spin on an old Woody Allen joke
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Wendy_Warden
As well as the sensible reasons from highlander it's also a clever spin on an old Woody Allen joke
Oh? Please Explain!
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new boy
The reason I said that is.......................................
The first Time I ever had sex............was on my wedding night............. at 24 years old.
All I can say is there are alote of JW couples out there who are not sexualy compatible...............for many different reasons.
This biggest one is sex is really not thought of in a wholesome way..................Your taught your whole life its not a good thing.
So............Now were married lets have some fun!................"wrong" the brain says "its been wrong so long, how can it be O.K. now?"
So when you marry a "Good JW" you really get the........................."sex roulette wheel"
And as you know in ROULETTE..................for every winner............ there is a loser too.
No way to tell until the wedding night ...................when you .....roll that ball!
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new boy
Read the thread on page 6019 about............is oral sex in "God's organaziation O.K.