Well as a mom of two young girls I hope that they will wait to have sex until they are in a committed relationship but NOT wait until they are married. First of all, setting that restriction in your mind can hasten marriage before the person has had a chance to grow up. Look at how many 18/19 yr olds are getting married in the organization, it is insane! Second, sexual compatibility, while slightly over-rated, is nonetheless, important to the health of a marriage. Also, there is something to be said about "sowing your wild oats" before you get tied down in a marriage. Going to college and experimenting is part of growing up for most 20 yr olds. I know I'm not the only one who feels cheated that I didn't get to experience that. I know that others will disagree, but I think, no matter how unpleasant it may be, it is a rite of passage as fundamental as going to high school.
First time for me.........."The wedding night"
by new boy 40 Replies latest jw friends
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megsmomma
Oh my goodness.....My first time (my wedding night) was a nightmare. We had NO IDEA what to do or expect and it was very.....quick. I was like....Oh, this is sex......what a dissappointment. We were even scared about pregnancy....like it could just slip in and you would get pregnant without even knowing.
It never got better either....with all the rules to follow. Plus my ex was a bit "gay in his heart and not attracted to wemon".
I once told my friend who was soon to marry and wondering what sex was like...."It is like doing dishes (YES...DISHES)...it is something you just have to do every so often." NICE.
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rolling rock
megsmomma
Post 450 of 450
since 20-Sep-06
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"I once told my friend who was soon to marry and wondering what sex was like...."It is like doing dishes (YES...DISHES)...it is something you just have to do every so often." NICE." -
Junction-Guy
Well I never waited for our wedding night. I just figured "well Armageddon's coming, I'll be destroyed, I might as well get me some" AK-Jeff, you went to a convention on your honeymoon--that beats all I've ever heard.
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Gregor
New boy, Not sure if I'm interpreting your roulette ANALogy (sometimes the ball lands on red...sometimes on black)correctly? Is it anything like a scratch in billiards?? (ball goes in the wrong pocket)
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megsmomma
Rollingrock......Heck no I do not feel that way anymore. I am now married to a man who IS attracted to wemon...and we have no rules (except our own) to follow. Sex is like dancing now......sometimes you just gotta get your grove on!!!!
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cyrus
The only thing i waited for was being sixteen.my first time was with atwenty y old woman who after thought i was the best ever (she had been about )nothing wrong with that though .My secret was simply porn mags and not just pictures i read the stories too .the next girl i went with was 18 and after i asked her if she had come and when she said no i was devastated ,so every time we got together i asked her how and what she liked .Never had a prob since.my present girlfreind is 24 im 40 she is rampant and the only prob i have is keeping up (not keeping it up) so in my experience ask questions and experiment.
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unbeliever
My first time was with someone very experienced. I am so glad I picked someone who was experienced. I heard all these stories from my friends about how bad and awkard their first time was. I did not have to deal with that.
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new boy
The post was not about the problems of the first time..........That goes without saying!
REBIRTH & SASS-MY-FRASS.............have it right, its about sexual compatibility.
My roulette analogy is that sometimes you win and some times you LOSE and sometimes you just break even.
You bought the horse..............but the horse is lame........and the the JWs have a NO REFUND policy!
As in "I didn't believe in sex before marriage! What would make you thing I would after?" -----
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lilybird
hi new boy.. I was a teen Dub in the late 70's and I remember a brother who left bethel before his 4 years were up because he wanted to get married..Also he said he had some issues and disappointments with Bethel that he wouldn't share with anyone. He lost privledges in the congregation for a while, because he left early.But everyone worshipped him so much because he was a bethel boy, that didn't last long. He did marry a friend of mine a year later. She was a pioneer and very staunt Dub..They were never really that compatible over the years and my mother-in-law told me they separated after 20 some years of marriage and were getting divorced. They are still Dubs. I see him out in fieldservice occasionally. I do believe it was her decision to end the marriage. She never seemed so happy. My husband and I always felt she was actually a lesbian trying to tow the line. She would vacation yearly with 2 "worldly" girlfriends she had known since she was a child..