10 years difference isn't a huge difference anyway. A twenty to thirty year difference might turn some heads, but even then, if it doesn't matter to the two adult parties involved then who cares? And you're always taking a chance starting relationships at work, regardless of age differences. Actually, you are taking a chance whenever you start any relationship. It's not like elders are going to show up at your door with the Family book, and ask when you plan on getting married! (That's not gonna happen, right?)
Age Differences in Relationships Help!
by noontide 43 Replies latest jw friends
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Good Girl or Bad Girl?
my boyfriend is 8 years older than me and he is an amazing, beautiful person with whom i connect like no other person i've ever met. we are best friends. i know that we are compatible in the ways that are truly matter, and between the two of us i do believe he has more energy!
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Good Girl or Bad Girl?
also let me add that he treats me as an equal, and never makes an issue of our age difference. he never makes me feel like i'm his "little girl" in a demeaning sense. i feel nothing but completely respected by him.
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unbeliever
If you are compatible I don't think age should matter. My SO is 11 years older than me and we don't have a lot in common. If not for our son I don't think I would have gotten so deeply involved with him. He sometimes treats me like a child and it pisses me off to no end.
I say if you are attracted to this woman (not girl) I say go for it. There is nothing creepy about it.
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frozen one
If you think she is interested in you ask her for her home phone number. If she gives it to you that'll confirm she is interested and you will call her and ask her out. If she declines giving out the number, then her interest beyond work flirting doesn't exist. Either way you will know. Don't worry about the age difference. I would say the important thing is to act quickly. If she has been showing interest with little response from you she will grow weary of the whole thing and move on to someone else while you kick yourself for being indecisive. I noted that in your posts you mentioned marriage and transfering if it doesn't work out. Slow down a bit. One step at a time.
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Abandoned
I wouldn't be too worried about the age thing. Someone womene look for older guys because they feel he will be more mature and settled. What matters most, in my humble opinion, is whether or not you have a connection. It sounds like you do and the best way to find out is to do more things together and talk.
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kristyann
To tell the truth, I do get off a little over the fact that a man is older (if I'm with an older man, that is). Different things work for different people, but my personal opinion is that anything older than 10 or 12 years would be too much for me. But that amount (10-12 years older) is hot for some reason.
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JWdaughter
My husband is almost 8 years older, and I don't think his age is the source of any marital issues. Other things have been at times, but his age is nothing.
A good friend at work-actually a nice couple at work, who I am friends with are 25 years apart in age-which one would think to be a disaster. It isn't. They are really well suited and she totally thinks of him passionately as her husband, lover, friend, and even (now) co-worker (he recently started managing our store). And when they are together, you don't think of the age difference. I am jealous of how close and connected they are to each other. Not icky, just quietly loving and kind to each other. They have both had some health issues in the time I have known them, but they support each other unfailingly. He has children nearly her age, and she has a teenager that he has raised since his infancy. They have been together for 15 years now, but only married about 4 years. True love can happen at any age.
If you can get past the co-worker thing, don't worry about the age thing. If you all have nothing in common, you will find out soon enough. Just date, you don't have to propose next week. Good luck, and have fun!
WAIT, my brother married my sis in law 7 years ago and he is 11 years older. They have had more stress and strain than many in their marriage with 2 parents dying of cancer, one child severely disabled(their first) and financial strains that surround that. They love each other and support each other. Age isn't an issue with them. BTW, he was bald when they met, and she is very cute. Their hearts pulled them together, just like the other couple I mentioned. Love will transcend age. Usually that is a good thing!
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lisavegas420
My husband is 18 years older than I am. We've been married for 13 years, been together for 15 years.
lisa
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Crumpet
When Mr C and I got together he was 31 and I was 22 so we have a similar age gap. I would say for the most part over the last 9 years it hasn't really made a big big difference, but there have been subtle ones which I will outline for you now in case you think any of these could become insurmountable as an issue later on.
1.) Whilst I wouldn't call myself immature exactly sometimes I think my frivolity and lack of responsibility as a girl in her 20's whilst Mr C has approached his forties and has been there and done all that has been a bit annoying for him. I'm finally the age now that he was when he met me. Sometimes if there is an age gap you have to be patient and wait for the other person to learn the things you can only learn through experience.
2) Mr C's socialising methods differed from my own - he would like to make friends with neighbours and dine with them regularly etc and chose a home in a family oriented area - so all the neighbours have kids like he does. I tend to be-friend people through work and other friends and bars and college and often closer to my own age with my freedom from kids. This has been a bone of contention which has just grown and grown. he thnks my friends are frivoulous and I think his are nice but a bit dull and middle aged.
3) Then there is sexually - women reach their peak between their 30's and 40's - that could cause problems if one partner feels frustrated...
However these kinds of issues only tend to come out in the long term I think. If i had been aware about them before they come up perhaps I could have thought of a way to prevent them becoming issues. And remember there are just as many probs going out with some one your own age - they are just different.
i think you sound like a kind person and so does she - the chicken soup is a definite give away that she likes you for sure! Very romantic! Keep us posted!