i'm still alive...

by thebiggestlie 40 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Paralipomenon
    Paralipomenon

    Ugh, conflicting emotions here.

    Knowing the WTBTS is such a crock I sympathize with you. But they are your parents. They decide if you stay or go. Now different parents will put up with a different amount of rebelliousness. I have no idea how strict your parents are.

    If your parents are the slightest bit reasonable you might be able to work out a compromise. Faith isn't something you can force on someone. It's just not possible.

    The crusades were based on religion trying to force faith on the heathen masses. In the end people converted, not because they had faith, but because they were afraid of torture and death.

    If your parents ask you to go to the hall, it's my personal feeling as a father that you should obey them. They are your parents even if they are misguided.

    Were your parents raised Witnesses? If not, ask them if their parents were supportive of their conversion.

    This is a nice point because either answer benefits your plight.

    If they were supportive, ask them to be supportive of your decision as well.

    If they were not supportive, ask them how that made them feel. Tell them that they are doing the same thing to you. Naturally the line they would most likely retort with is "But we have the truth". But didn't their parents think -they- had a truth as well?

    While I think children should be respectful, you are almost an adult so they can't force how you react or think. If they force you to go in the door to door work and you don't have the faith to back it up, how good a witness will you really be giving? If a householder asks you if you personally believe it, should you lie? What is their motivation for this? Is it to avoid personal embarrassment?

    So my advice is, if you stick around pretending to have faith only to leave when you move out, your parents may feel extremely used and may fortify in their minds how wicked children are that leave "God's Light". That might be a deciding factor in how open they are to the whole shunning process.

    This advice is only based on if you have resonable parents, if you think your parents are completely unreasonable and blinded by the "Light" then I would agree with the above and just buckle down until you can move out on your own.

    As a parent I would rather have my heart broken by honesty than deception, but again every child's relationship with their parents are unique. I wanted to give you a different perspective to consider.

  • exjdub
    exjdub

    Glad to hear you are OK TBL. I have to say I am quite surprised your parents let you continue getting on the internet. Oftentimes that is the first thing to go. I hope you are able to come back and tell us what happened when the dust settles.

    Don't be too quick to state your position when you disagree with the WTBTS and your parents. I don't recommend lying, however saying nothing can be a useful tool to deflect scrutiny, while at the same time preserving your integrity. Saying little, or nothing, can be a very useful tool, which you found out during the confrontation with your parents. Good strategy. Take care.

    exjdub

  • Virgochik
    Virgochik

    Take good care of yourself physically, too. When I was in your shoes, sitting at meetings disgusted me to the point of nausea and headaches. I had to go along with it till I could get a job and an apartment. It is really tough to smile and pretend. Eat healthy, try to get enough sleep, prepare your plans. Are you allowed to go on to college? That'll give you some breathing room. If not, start looking at ads for jobs and apartments early, get an idea what they cost, and where you want to live. Save any money you have towards your new place. Figure out transportation, so the day you leave, you've got it all ready. That's what I did, I plotted for years, but once I walked, I never had to go back. One fine day, you'll escape and it'll be sweet!

  • Rooster
    Rooster

    You have already started 1 topic(s) in the last 1 day(s) out of your limit of 1.
    You cannot start another for 10 hour(s) 30 min(s) when your oldest topic expires.

    Good luck..

  • SPAZnik
    SPAZnik

    Peacekeeping can be a proud and dignified choice.

  • LeslieV
    LeslieV

    Well I am glad to read that you are ok.

    Remember your way out is SCHOOL. Go to college, get an education, stay in a dorm. Go speak to your guidance counselor at school...tell him/her that you need to go away to college. What do you need to do? How can you do it? It is a way of getting out, with your dignity. You are wise, play the game until you really don't need to anymore. Freedom comes with education, so that you can financially take care of yourself. Good Luck, know that we are all here for you.

    Leslie

  • RAF
    RAF

    (((TBL)))
    Take care ... (time is part of the key)

  • Narkissos
    Narkissos

    Take it easy dude

    The path of least hurt both to yourself and your parents is to be found step by step.

    Keep us updated when you can.

  • mavie
    mavie

    I just sent you an invite to myspace page. love the 'fond farewell' acoustic elliott. that song and 'memory lane' are two of my favorites from the album.

  • LtCmd.Lore
    LtCmd.Lore

    Glad to hear you weren't disfellowshiped or anything!

    I'd love to hear what you discussed, even if you are supposed to be confined to the societies literature, there are still a LOT of things that you could 'notice'. Like the whole 1975 thing, or my personal favorite the 1995 generation change, in which they not only change the definition of a word, but they also change their minds about another 'the end is near' prophecy!

    However, I don't think more confrontation is a good idea. (It's fun to think about though.... )

    I had a pretty big discussion once, not quite as bad as yours sounds, but a big one nonetheless. It was about the governing body, I said in so many words that we have no reason to believe they're anointed other than they say so... they eventualy agreed but said I neaded faith. (Faith in a bunch of old guys in New York???) It's been several months and they totally forgot about the whole thing, and I was never dragged to the back room.

    So anyways, if you just lay low for a while, it'll probably all blow over pretty soon.

    Great to hear from you.

    [[[ABL]]] <~ manly hug...

    LtCmd.Lore

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