That is quite possible since it's a 'performance' based religion. So it might be your learned JW reactions showing through sometimes.
Yeah this is something like what I was pondering.
For me it was never being 'good enough' for my parents. I've only learned through 'inner child'/cognitive behavioural therapy that what I 'learned' in the past was affecting how I react to things now. It's taking a long time for me to unravel it all, and unlearn all the harmful reactions but I'm getting there
That sounds very helpful. I'll talk to you more about this privately as I have a question about it.
If I was in your MySpace situation, I'd be askng myself things like have I had a previous unpleasant experience on the internet, or something similar, and try to 'unpack it' but if there isn't any link, I'll say it might just be that it happened on a bad time for me.
This is a good way to process it. The last part esp, 'bad timing'. Healthy.
I have a myspace page but frankly I find the whole thing pointless and a waste of time and so I maybe look in about once every 4 months to see what spammers have tried to make me their friend so they can advertise stuff. Mainly I just click delete delete delete without even looking at the friend requests. If I haven't specifically emailed someone to add me as their friend then no one I know or want to know will be adding me. They will be some arab trying to get a shag - yep I have about 8 or 9 of those!
I'm sorry but this made me laugh a little. Yet, I do see your point!
However I did have a similat experience or two with Friends Reunited. I private messaged a school friend and waited months for a reply and then went back and realised that about 6 of my class mates were in the list for that year and class but none of them had entered anything on their profiles and some of them had spelt their names wrong. From that I deduced that I wasnt being ignored - my school friend hadnt joined friends reunited at all - the site simply got a list of names and added them in the hope that that person would join one day and find loads of messages and want to pay premium for extra membership priveledges or some such nonsense.
Omg, I had something very similar happen to me some years back. I got a message (supposedly) from an old classmate, very generic in retrospect. I sent a message and never heard back. Then I went to the site and, like you figured out that the web site got a listing of former students and sent out generic emails in hope of gaining business. How rude!!
And I have also found emails from people years later to old email addresses I have forgotten about and then felt terrible and tried to email them back - but their email addy is now no longer active. Stuff happens - unless you have been regularly in touch with someone and they cut off contact (as Frannie described in the thread about when Friends Let you Down) dont take it personally - it really probably isnt remotely related to you. As I was so "kindly" told by Mr C last night - stop thinking its all about you - I never dont phone you because I am ignoring you, I am just too busy! (At this point I tried to explain I would prefer it if he was ignoring me because at least then it would feel like he had an active interest in me!!) Arggghhh!
I do believe you are right in this. Things happen and people get busy. Imagine that, people have lives, lol.
This is what my brain keeps saying to myself.
But on the other hand, regardless of the reason, I need to get over the idea that people Have to like me or at least not hate me.
i had someone not add me as a friend
when i asked them about it they said that i am easier to find in the friends pending section of myspace than in the friends section.
Oh wow, that's an interesting reason. I have seen several myspace sites where there are hundreds or thousands of "friends" and I just sit there and wonder how you would ever keep track of all those people. Good on ya for contacting myspace to ask them about it.
I have to say, while I was cleaning a bit, I really came to realize that the thing is, that while every one of these possibilities are possible, is there anything wrong with a person just not liking me (you)? Isn't it their right? I mean think about it, there are bound to be people on this planet we just don't click or connect with. Do we have to personally connect with every being on the planet? Or on a smaller scale, on a discussion board or myspace?
