Oh, by the way, I did visit a local Bible church, definately more at ease. It made me feel better a little while, But I will be looking more inside of myself for faith?
You have the right idea! The Bible teaches us about a relationship with Jehovah through Jesus Christ, not about a religion. It is a deeply personal faith, but thrives among others who share a true commitment to the Bible and not to cultic man-made rules. I wish you success in finding a new community who will love you, regardless of the past. That is Jesus' unconditional love in action! I have experienced it and it is a beautiful thing.