An apology is at least (if it not always an act of repentence and even sometimes an act to ask forgiveness wich is actually more dedicated to relieve the offender than the victime), an act wich is supposed to make clear that he/she have been the offender (an offender should not ask forgiveness when he apologies it's the victime perogative).
When it's about a big issue (like rapes / murder ...) which have not been reported and the offender didn't have to go to jail because of it or that it is too late to convict the offender (for him to go to jail) ... He/she should at least first make an official declaration (to the police or anything offical) to make sure that nobody will ever say again something like : this didn't happen and more clearly this is who did it ... otherwise it's a bit too easy to just apologies to the victime.
Would an apology be enough?
by Big Tex 33 Replies latest watchtower child-abuse
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onacruse
Chris:
I'm really starting to try on the idea that people, men or women, don't/can't/won't change from one extreme of the Bell curve of human behavior to the middle and actually develop compassion and empathy.
Though I have no evidence of this, I suspect that that is exactly the reason why many, if not most, States (perhaps it's even a Federal requirement...I don't know) require that convicted sexual offenders be registered as such, and inform the local authorities of their whereabouts. And why? Because, even with all the sobbing apologies, and prison time, and psychotherapy, the recidivism rate is horrendous (I recall it's like 80%, though again, I don't have any evidence of that).
If I may interject a somewhat related experience: I worked as a construction engineer at a Federal Prison, and since inmates were part of the workforce, we civies were required to take a one-day "orientation" about 'inmate mentality and behavior.' One thing I distinctly recall is the Corrections Officer making it clear in no uncertain terms that "these guys stopped growing up when they were 5 or 6 years old...they only think of themselves, and will and do take advantage of every opportunity to further their own self-interests, in ways that you and I don't think about. They will apolgize profusely when they're caught doing something wrong, even as they are planning their next move."
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outoftheorg?
Onacruse, that corrections officer said it all.
Even if they manage to stop the molestations, "which very few ever do" their thought processes remain the same. They feel no genuine remorse.
The uncle that molested my daughter, even though there was several women who blamed him, for touching them, never showed any remorse. I think he was proud of his acts and never felt even the slightest remorse. Even trying to be friendly with his accusers that hated him.
To this day we never did find all of his victims. He finally died. good riddance.
Outoftheorg