One night stands (page 5)

sass_my_frass

Now that I have a more Proper View Of Sex, I regret that I missed out on such an opportunity due to living inside a jar of formaldehyde for many years. You go girl. Don't get hurt.

To be fair.....sometimes sex is just that........a physical desire and need. I would not feel the moral guilt as I once did trying to get those needs met physically. You can have fun in the heat of passion and be responsible too.

Playing with your emotions......trying to detach sex from feeling loved sexually.......not being able to do that sucessfully can lead to confusion, pain and all sorts of stuff.

purps

Crumpet

What happens if you fall head over heels in love with some guy and he feels the same way about you but doesn't know your past........and then he finds out?

Dansk I think we come from very very different places. I wouldn't even consider dating someone who would judge me on my number of sexual partners. I simply couldnt be in love with somone like that. And I wouldnt consider dating someone who hadn't had lots of partners themselves.

I make absolutely no secret of the fact I'd like to reach triple figures before I die! (okay just kidding) But seriously I never attempt to conceal my sexual history from anyone.

Purps - lovely post. I think you are probably right, but I am naturally defensive and I don't know that I could let myself be close enough to anyone to ever make love. I know I am missing out but I just can't make myself that vulnerable emotionally - not for anyone, no matter how much I love them.

I had a glimmer once and ran away!

ButtLight

Well, I think its a personal choice. If I were single......I wouldnt have a problem with it......but wouldnt make a habit out of it either. Why? Of course the diseases.....but also the way us women get labled! Guys can do it as often as they like, and its ok. But if we do, we are automatically called Slu*ts. Which I think is crazy.

If I were going to do it, I think I would make it clear to the person before hand that Im not looking for a relationship......that way they are forwarned, and have a chance to say no. If you both are ok with it.....I dont see anything wrong with it.

When I was young, and left the "truth" (like another poster said) I did have my share. I think it was more of a "Im free, I can do what I want" thing...

What ever you do, dont pick an Identical twin to do the one nighter with.......I did, and got the ole switch er roo done to me! Didnt find out till days later, when people were making jokes about it at the bar!

Nowman

I slept with my husband on the 1st date!

Nikki

Finally-Free

I had a lot of them when I was younger. Eventually it got boring, so I joined the cult and eventually settled into the toxicity of a meaningful relationship. I've learned my lesson, and now I stay home and spend quality time with my television and my bird. Believe it or not, I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything at all.

W

Terry

If men ever stop looking at sex as though it were an overwrought sneeze they might suddenly become humans.

Men confuse first-person-shooter games with sexual conquest all too readily as it is. Perhaps too much masturbation conditions this handgun approach; I can't really say for sure.

"Get 'er done" isn't much of a relationship starter.

I can only imagine women would have to be nigh on desperate (touch-starved) to entertain most of the men out there eager for a grab at fleeting frivolity.

Men's souls shrink faster than their pecker after sex, and; their persona becomes all too apparent to their partner as the man's veneer of seductive charm mutates into either a nap or a dash for the door.

Until men find a little blue pill for their intellect, empathy and humanity; I can't imagine why women would bother to allow their studly contribution of the "sneeze" into their premises.

But, that's just me.

tim hooper

Crumples,

You do realise that we have to divorce now, don't you?

tim

crashfire451

I think maybe I just don't really place a high value on sex. To me it's on a par with a really nice meal.

Damn, woman. Either you've discovered ambrosia, or your partners have done you a disservice. And no, I'm not implying I could do any better. I'm still trying to figure out what all this "little man in the canoe" talk is all about. I mean, what's more important, the little man, or the canoe? And what if the answer isn't static but ever changing? What if sometimes the little man wants attention, while at other times all that matters is rockin' the canoe? So confusing....

Personally, I think one night stands can be wonderful. I think it's all a matter of where a person is in their life. I spent years after escaping the borg enjoying the wonders of variety. Later, after a serious relationship ended as a result of my income going from young executive to jarhead, I enjoyed another few years of sampling the fairer sex. At those times in my life, all I wanted was to have fun and enjoy the company of attractive, intelligent ladies. I've been married now for just over two years, and that's wonderful too. Sex with a loving, trusted partner is outstanding for all the reasons that have been mentioned. Is it better? I think it depends entirely on where a person is in their life. And I don't mean to imply that people in a committed relationship are more mature or farther along in their 'growth'. It's not a measure of maturity, just preference.

Brigid

I think they're fine if the two people involved are on the same page...therein lies the crux.

I could never do it. I did one time pick an acquaintance for casual sex when I got desperate but I couldn't enjoy it without some sort of connection.

So, one night stands, not for me. But that's just me.

Do what thou wilt.

One night stands