YOUR DAILY JOURNAL (page 74)

coffee_black

Today was full of great news... With car troubles behind me ( turned out to just need a new key) I can look forward to my trip to Virginia that starts Friday morning. Can't wait to see all my family, including my new granddaughter.

Good news #1` My daughter called this morning. She has been going through a horiffic divorce. He hasn't paid child support for a very long time, and is now about $20,000.00 behind. He is violent, bipolar, and has made life he*l for my daughter and grandkids for a very long time. (my daughter could, and should write a book) He was put in jail today.. for 6 months...for contempt of court in not even attempting to pay child support. No chance of early release unless he pays $1000.00 that will go directly to my daughter...and that only qualifies him for work release. He'll still be in jail on weekends. I can't even begin to describe what it has been like for her. He even showed my granddaughter, age 9 a gun with a silencer. (which by the way is a federal offense to have in one's posession.) He will also be charged at some point with identity theft against his own son, and namesake... resulting in bad credit for my 13 year old grandson. So today begins a new life for them. There are still hurdles to overcome, but it's looking good for the first time in years. She has full custody until all is resolved.

Good news #2 I also got the news that I don't have to return to Boston for 2 days during my vacation to do a trade show that I normally have to do.... Yeah! more time to spend with my kids and grandkids!

And to top it all off it was such a beautiful day here that I didn't even need a coat!

Coffee who is doing the happy dance

Coffee....who is doing the happy dance...

Sad emo

dear diary

I'm down at the moment. If I could describe it in weather terms, it's very overcast with occasional breaks of sunshine peeking through.

Remembering a Garfield cartoon I once saw...

I'm down, down, down...

comma comma down dooby do down down...

always raises a smile when I remember that cartoon!

I've been filling out forms all day long - job applications, benefit applications, still more to do yet and I'm frazzled. I've registered with an agency today who seem pretty confident that they have at least one vacancy I could fill so they're sending my cv to the employer - the one cheering part to my day.

My cough is back with a vengeance. I'll give it another clout of medicine to try clear it. If it doesn't go away I guess I'll see the doc.

Suppose the sooner I do these remaining forms, the better I'll feel. I just can't face any more.

megaflower

I want to relearn life. I feel that since I spent my mid 20's till now-40's that I have lost the ability to really relate to people. I also want to spend some quality time with my husband. We just booked a trip for the end of may anf that should be really nice. When I think about it we have not spent much quality time together. We were always off to a meeting, studying, out in field service,assemblys. We both left the org and it feels so good.

summer

Wish I could do something for you (((Sad emo)))

How about I sing that "I'm down, down, down...comma comma down dooby do down down..." with my best french accent???

Hopefully it will raise another smile:-)

compound complex

YOUR DAILY JOURNAL

Dearest Ladies:

coffee, emo, mega, *summer* ...

CoCo La Rose

Sad emo

All forms more or less done now, phew.

I just hope that tomorow, my 'friends' at the Jobcentre can restore my faith in their ability and willingness to help me!!

Thank you summer, yes you raised another smile

megaflower - you see that wide empty freeway spread out before you? There's a whole new world to explore - enjoy!!!

coffee - keep on dancing happy dances

And CoCo, greetings to you, I hope life is still treating you well. Any more art commissions on the horizon?

VoidEater

My partner quit his job today. It's been a tense couple of weeks, him having been injured on the job, unable to get convenient doctor appointments (only upcoming time slots during his work hours), unable to do his typical duties; followed up with a written agreement about what his "light duties" were expected to be, his boss constantly demanding additional work (tasks that aggravated his injury, time beyond what the doctor laid out).

Today he was cornered by the two owners of the company, accused of malingering, of being an insurance cheat, of dragging out his healing time...his response: "You'd get to talk to me like that - if I worked here", and out he walked.

On the one hand, it's a great weight lifted off my shoulders worrying about how he is being treated and getting along while at work - his boss is a classic bipolar with narcissism (having grown up with a father exactly like this, I think I have some insight into how that sort of thing plays out).

On the other hand...this may not be the best time to be out of a job, considering how the economy has impacted our family over the pas 4 years...

Ah, well - such is the journey... -Void

compound complex

YOUR DAILY JOURNAL

Emo:

Yes - a residential mural and canvas backdrops for both a photographer and a party-planner. Plus designing a wedding. Other than that, raking leaves, scrubbing toilets, cleaning a restaurant, teaching ... all in the name of making a living. Thanks for asking.

I hope you find the ideal job with the ideal boss; and take care of that cough! Orders from your big brother!

VoidEater:

I'm sorry about your partner's injury and work-related difficulties. It seems that the bottom line with businesses is uninterrupted employee efficiency, their doing the "mostest for the leastest" - for the maximum benefit to the owner.

Wishing you and him the best possible outcome despite the delicate matter of domestic finances.

CoCo

cognac

well, today was ok...

Lately, I feel like I'm facing a lot of my own questions. I don't think we are living forever on earth... I'm not sure, but it doesn't seem like it. This upset's me...

I don't want to go to heaven... (Which I'm not sure about also)... I want to have sex, lots of it, in human form. I don't want to die. I DON'T WANT TO DIE AT ALL!!!

I still don't understand why God let's people suffer. I mean, I know the JW line of thought, but even at that, emotionally, it can't be explained...

What the heck am I supposed to do with my life? Is this life all there is?

I like the JW teaching, everything had an answer for everything. I miss that terribly... Things you didn't have an answer for, would be better understood in the New System which was very close... I never believed that 99% of the population wouldn't make it anyways...

I miss who I felt were my friends. But, I can't be close with people who go along with some of the teachings I know to be false...

Why are there evil people on this earth? Are there demons inside of them or what???

Why do I feel sad right now? I don't want to be. I just want to live my life and enjoy it every single day...

Why can't I be a foster parent? There are so many kids who go through crap that need one and I think I'd be a great one... I have so much love to give but nobody to really give it to. I have my husband, but we aren't the lovey dovey type...

I don't understand things anymore... Nothing makes any sense to me... I'm sad...

Sorry about my rant, just had to get some of it out...

compound complex

YOUR DAILY JOURNAL

Dear Cognac:

Sorry that you're feeling so blue ...

We, as JWs, DID have all the answers. How comforted we were because there was an answer for everything. On the off-chance that the Society truly didn't have a timely reply to our question, we could always depend on Jehovah's making things right [eventually, unless the answer to our fervent prayer was NO].

We are at varying stages of the denial-anger-bargaining-depression-acceptance syndrome. The one thing that can be real for you is finding some "little one" whom you can love and guide through life. I have lots of "adopted" family who have truly eased my way. It works both ways.

Be patient, become available ... your new family is about to be born....

Love,

CoCo

YOUR DAILY JOURNAL

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