What do we really know about Jehovah?

by PopeOfEruke 29 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • PopeOfEruke
    PopeOfEruke

    I started making a list of what we really know about Jehovah from the Bible. See if you can add to the list.

    1. Likes to take afternoon walks, especially when it's breezy.

    2. Likes the smell of roasting animals.

    3. Likes dancing and singing but doesn't necessarily dance and sing himself.

    4. Can write a little bit, though only with one finger. Usually gets humans to write for him instead.

    5. Seems to like cheap magic tricks, like talking donkeys and magic burning bushes.

    6. Always resorts to violence to solve problems instead of dialogue or diplomacy.

    7. He can reproduce asexually.

    8. He likes to be called Father and he has sons, but his "wife" is a group of sexless spirits, who are also his sons.

    Any more??

    Pope

  • SacrificialLoon
    SacrificialLoon

    9. Poor decision maker - He'd rather have people going door to door than the rock and the trees crying his name. I think that talking rocks and trees would win more converts, plus there's a lot more rocks than people.

  • Stealth453
    Stealth453

    He is pretty damned vague when it comes to telling his subjects what he expects from them. Perhaps he doesn't know himself.

  • nvrgnbk
    nvrgnbk

    He is mysteriously absent.

  • PopeOfEruke
    PopeOfEruke

    10. He is arbitrary. He may kill a human instantly for coitus interruptus or for not putting all their money in a contribution box, but he will happily leave mass murderers and dictators (like Hilter or Stalin) alive to torture and kill millions of people.

  • The Dragon
    The Dragon

    Is all about withholding of information from others to remain superior to them..does not want humans equal to him anymore than Bill Gates wants laptops to become his equal or surpass him.

  • OUTLAW
    OUTLAW

    What do we really know about jehovah???..If we`re to believe the WBT$..Jehovah would`nt have a Job without the WBT$...OUTLAW

  • wozadummy
    wozadummy

    He likes his subjects to think he protected them from a earthquake/sunami by being at a meeting at the Kingdom Hall , but keeps quiet about the brothers who died in field service hit by a car when parked on the side of the road!

  • frankiespeakin
    frankiespeakin

    He is very posessive, demanding, easily irritated, explosive temper, wants people to beleive in him, and will kill those that don't.

  • wozadummy
    wozadummy

    Wants everyone to call him by name , but Jesus does'nt have to say it once in the Greek Scriptures!

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