Is it appropriate for a stranger to comment on a woman's bruises? (page 2)

unique1

I would carry a laminated card as Sad Emo said.

Or you could just say, some lady asked me the same thing the other day and I beat the shit out of her but she got in one good lick as you can see from the bruised eye.

rebel8 it just goes to show the importance of outward appearances. People will make assumptions based on how you appear to them. I actually think it's a good thing that people take the trouble to ask you if you're ok. It's obviously irritating you but to be anonymous in a society that is indifferent is in my opinion worse. I'm not sure how you could fend off these unwelcome approaches, but maybe you could just smile and tell them the exact name of your condition. Baffle them with medical nomenclature and put their mind at ease in one fowl (or foul) swoop so to speak.

Clam

nvrgnbk

but maybe you could just smile and tell them the exact name of your condition. Baffle them with medical nomenclature and put their mind at ease

Perfect suggestion clam!

ButtLight

Put a sign on your back " Im a victim of watchtower abuse" ?

hamsterbait

In this day and age there is enough information in public view for anybody in an abusive relationship to know where to go for help.

How dare they ask intimate questions like some dumbass JW?

This is another example of how snoopy and interfering modern society is becoming.

I suppose we should all be happy that the Witlesses knock on our doors wanting to help us with their good intentions too.

"Want a few of your own, Punk?" I would say.

HB

bluesapphire

How annoying and I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL.

I also bruise easily and am clutsy. This weekend I bumped my head and hit my toe twice! Last week I fell down the stairs of my house and ended up with a whole bunch of bruises, rug burns and a swollen ankle!

People at work "do-gooders" used to bug the hell out of me asking me how I got those bruises. And, honestly, many times I just didn't know how I got them because I bump into things and I don't even feel it lots of times since I'm always in a hurry. So I'd have this stupid look on my face and say, "I have no idea..."

Eventually people stopped asking. I think some people still wonder but when they see me with really no other problems and many have met my husband so eventually people stopped asking. Plus, people have seen me do clutsy things here too.

When it comes to strangers I think you can just say, "Oh, I have a medical condition. Thanks for your concern though." And just leave it at that.

rebel8

"I would ask, and observe the persons reaction/response, before I made any decision to proceed. with advice I also think that I would advise her that there were agiencies available to offer help, if help was wanted and/or needed."

Truth be told, there are some who have said exactly that, and I have no right to be annoyed at them.

"I am fair-skinned and have always bruised easily"

Me too. I am the love child of Caspar the Friendly Ghost and the Pillsbury Dough Boy. Self-tanners, blech.

"it's all good now, I killed the mofo!"
"some lady asked me the same thing the other day and I beat the shit out of her but she got in one good lick as you can see from the bruised eye"
"victim of wt abuse"

lol--you've got a good point there. Why don't I use humor? I use it for everything else.

"could you get some sort of medical note to show the ones who are more persistent"

Good idea! I could just show them my medical alert bracelet. D'oh! Why didn't I think of that?

"maybe you could just smile and tell them the exact name of your condition. Baffle them with medical nomenclature"

I think I will try that next time. I haven't used that one in years. Maybe I will encounter some more intelligent people this time.

Last time I was in social work college and my fellow students did an "intervention" with me loudly in the middle of the student lounge. I explained I have xyz condition and because they never had heard of it they said it was an excuse--"You know, rebel8, it's common for women in abusive relationships to give excuses...."

Paralipomenon

I'd say that I fell down the stairs. Then look earnestly at them and say that you'd like to move to a place that has "less stairs" but you don't have any money. Then look startled and apologize for intruding and shuffle away.

Hey, with medical bills to pay, why not make a buck?

DJK

I met a woman who had a broken arm. It was winter so I made a comment reflecting a skiing accident. She was pissed. I found out later her husband broke it for her. He was described as abusive, well yah! I wont ask again.

VanillaMocha73

I bruise easily as well. My mom got turned in to the elders for child abuse when a sister worked in our doctor's office. The doctor noted on my chart that I was covered in bruises and possible investigation? The sister told the elders in our KH who called her in. Now, she spanked me some, but most of the bruises were not from her. I just couldn't remember how I got them. Then, I was covered in bruises most days with the ex. One time a sister noticed my back and commented. One time the elders (most of whom turned out later to be 'apostate') cared... All the other KHs they just looked the other way and politely said little or nothing... Funny thing, when he took me to the hospitals he managed to stay close enough that I didn't get to talk to a doctor either. I think they don't allow that anymore. So, I would not be offended if someone asked - depending on whom the someone was and how it was asked. So many women suffer silently and they should not.

Is it appropriate for a stranger to comment on a woman's bruises?

Share this