she's a JW, I'm not, she's married, so am I.....

by simon4 24 Replies latest social relationships

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  cyberdyne systems 101

  The advice given is consistent - those not involved and looking on it are not emotionally attached and can give honest and right advice. I will second all that been said, it seems so wrong to whats going on in your head right now i know, but believe me some of us are talking from experience (BITTER) we only want you to do whats best for all including yourself. Try to understand whats wrong in your own marriage first, does your wife know there is a problem? Can a counsellor help you? Can you live apart from your children? Think long and hard, remove the distraction of this relationship and then take your time to know what you want and how to proceed. You at one time must have liked your wife, what was it about her? Do you share any responsibility in they way she is towards you now? Do you communicate to her how you feel?

  All the best and I hope you make some good choices

  CS 101
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  Watkins

  Everyone's given such excellent advice.Please listen!

  Only one point I want to reinterate - the guilt this woman feels is such an intrinsic part of her involvement with this toxic religion that it's inseparable from her present emotional disposition. You don't want to subject yourself and your (poor) children to that - not knowingly at least - so now you DO know. Don't only take two steps back - turn and run the other direction!

  I'm telling you friend, the JW religion can ruin any good woman - and she wants to go back, lead by her guilt. I'm sorry you feel so drawn to her, and I'm sure it feels like true love - but "it's better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all." This is a lose/lose situation for you and your family. Better that you stay away and work on your marriage now, than look back some months or years down the road and wish you'd never heard of the WatchTower and it's psychosis-driven, mind-controling, guilt inducing, twisted, warped and absolutely poisonous theology. She has already demonstrated what a powerful influence it has on her - please take that as a huge HINT of what lies ahead if you proceed to listen with only your emotional heart. If she were to become involved with you on a personal level, she must try to recruit you and your children into 'The Truth', or she wouldn't be a good little(brain-washed) witness.

  Listen to the sound reasonings of your mind - use your brain, man, and just do the right thing - you know what it is. It may be difficult, but you'll have no regrets over making what would be an 'improper', damaging and life-altering decision. No matter what it is you feel you want, forget yourself and do the right thing by your wife and children. If it doesn't work out, you'll at least know that you stood up for what's right and did everything possible within your power. Then, IF she leaves that religion - which is a psychological and emotional turmoil in itself - then you'll be free to move on with your next life phase. I just hope, for your sake and your kids' sake, that it doesn't involve the wacky watchtower... OK now, rant over...

  May you find peace of mind.

  Watkins
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  simon4

  Thanks everyone for your kind and compassionate advice/suggestions. I appreciate all of it.

  After 4 days I'm finally able to breathe a little bit. I have had no contact with her and am slowly purging her from my heart.....although I'm sure I'll think of her now and then. Her husband left her in a pinch and she borrowed money from some guy. I think she's become "loyal" to him now. It's a sad situation for her but she must do what she has to for the survival of herself and her 6 children. I wish she didn't have to struggle. She doesn't deserve this. Her life should be filled with joy, love , and happiness from now on. I just hope she finds someone like me :) but someone who's single and REALLY likes kids, lol.

  Thanks everyone

  honey, I'm coming home
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  simon4

  she had to drop something of today near my office. She wanted to see me....I couldn't help it, I had to see her one more time. The pain of a great love lost is unbearable(sp)....I had to see her. We held each other and cried, we kissed, we cried, we said goodbye for the last time.

  ....I would have held her mothers hand on the day she was born....what does it mean to be so sad when someone you love supposed to make you happy.....how do you keep love alive??.....(ryan adams)

  You can love more than one person but someone is going to get hurt AND everything fades eventually.....

  see you around
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  bigdreaux

  she may seem so wonderful because you understand each other. this may fade if you decide to be together and you may regret your decision. i agree with everyone else. settle your present relationship, then decide where to go from here. good luck bro.