Evolution of Richie: Post JW (page 2)

Kudra

HI Richie-

anyway, don't take offense at my cheap-ass dime-store psychoanalysis here but...

For what it's worth:

You say: "...explanation of my actions, more for myself than anyone else."

and: "Do I try to avoid more hurt and emotional pain by completely cutting most people off?"

I have noticed that when you started your body modification you reminded us more than a few times that you have done all that you do for YOURSELF and NOT ANYONE ELSE.

I think that you are compartmentalizing yourself (borrowing your phrase) and being an island unto yourself because for some reason or another you are afraid to do anything for someone ELSE's sake...

This is not in the "helping-other-people-wise" way but in the "allowing other people's (potentially negative) feelings to hurt me" way.

Or allowing their feelings to mold you into doing other that what you want (I see you as someone who likes to feel very confident in his own choices).

Well, is that somewhat close to reality? I don't really know you too well other than what I read here but you can pick up on some things, ya know?

Hope all goes well for you,

love

-K

Open mind

Sunnygal41 said:

...........so, we have to make choices on who we perceive is going to benefit the most or who is in greatest need, and still have energy for what we need it for. i have found that some people are energy vampires..........they will suck you dry, if you let them and are NOT interested in bettering their life or others.

Excellent!

Richie, it sounds like you're developing some great instincts. Keep looking for the healthiest balance of open heart & open mind.

Listen to me spouting off like I'm "wise" or something. Sheesh! You've "evolved" way more than I have and I'm in my forties!

Love your posts,

Open Mind

jeanniebeanz

I went through something along these lines about two years out of the dubbies. For me, the realization that it was okay for me to make up my own mind about people and that it was okay to dislike someone and be disliked was something of a revelation. As a dubbie, you are expected to feign a 'like' for everyone in the org, whether it was true or not, just get along, trust for the sake of trusting and doing otherwise meant you were not a good little dubbie. Heaven forbid.

It mellowed with time, but it's still nice to be able to make up your own mind and be ok with doing so. :)

Jean

RichieRich

anyway, don't take offense at my cheap-ass dime-store psychoanalysis here but...

No offense taken Kudra.

For what it's worth:

You say: "...explanation of my actions, more for myself than anyone else."

and: "Do I try to avoid more hurt and emotional pain by completely cutting most people off?"

I have noticed that when you started your body modification you reminded us more than a few times that you have done all that you do for YOURSELF and NOT ANYONE ELSE.

As a clarification on the body mod, I do that for my own satisfaction and from my own selfish, earthly, human desires. I don't do it to alter anyone else's opinion of me.

But then again, that could be because most people I don't know, I don't care about (including their opinions).

I think that you are compartmentalizing yourself (borrowing your phrase) and being an island unto yourself because for some reason or another you are afraid to do anything for someone ELSE's sake...

This is not in the "helping-other-people-wise" way but in the "allowing other people's (potentially negative) feelings to hurt me" way.

Or allowing their feelings to mold you into doing other that what you want (I see you as someone who likes to feel very confident in his own choices).

Well, is that somewhat close to reality? I don't really know you too well other than what I read here but you can pick up on some things, ya know?

there's really no doubt in my mind that I do take certain measures to protect myself. Is that bad? I mean, if someone gets robbed, are they in the wrong for installing a security system?

I try to be honest, both with myself and others.

I put a very large amount of time into pleasing myself. I don't think its unhealthy, but I think that I spent a lot of time putting other people's interests in front of my own and it didn't do any of us any good. I don't think I'm in the wrong for choosing a lifestyle that allows me to be happy.

I might really be seeing things from a skewed perspective, but I don't think its wrong to protect oneself or to not sell out and remain an individual.

???

JamesThomas

As usual Richie, your post is eloquent.

I can only suggest that you continue to watch the mind -- in an open and nonjudgmental way -- as it labels and categorizes people. Just as labels and stories that people construct about you, Richie, are not you, neither are your stories and labels about others what they genuinely are. If we sincerely desire to live a life of integrity and honesty, then we need to step beyond this way of falsely isolating and categorizing people and things.

Not labeling and constructing mental stories about people allows us to simply be openly present with them and experience a deeper undefinable sense of what they truly are. Try it, you'll like it. This does not mean we necessarily enjoy the company of all people; certainly for some people it is healthier not to be around them...and most always these "toxic" people we can see are drowning in some outrageous story about themselves and others. Seeing this, rather than hate them, there is understanding and compassion...as you bid them sainara.

Not labeling and telling stories about people and life, opens the way to experience the genuine richness of life. It's a simple fact that many people never come to know. This glorious moment of conscious existence is always open and waiting for us to know.

j

RichieRich

Thank you JamesThomas. That was exactly what I needed to read.

JamesThomas

You already knew it.

purplesofa

Richie

I am always amazed that you are 19.

You are a great person.

purps

JamesThomas

Purps:

I am always amazed that you are 19.

Purps, I used to feel this way to.

No matter what temporality may say, I stopped labeling our dear Richie to an age. He exudes an ageless quality of intelligence and charm.

j

jaguarbass

Instantly, upon meeting someone and getting to know them a bit, I either feel strong adoration for them or complete contempt. Everyone else falls into a hole dug by apathy.

It sounds like your picking up on the vibe their sending out. They say birds of a feather flock together. Your avoiding the turkeys.

Everybody you encounter in life, including you and I, want something from each person we deal with. It could be as simple as personal validation, or it could be your bank account.You are tuning in and determining you dont want to buy what some people are selling. Some people can be emotional vampires or lead you to caustic relationships.

Evolution of Richie: Post JW

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