I don't feel angry or resentful, do you?

Orgull

I'm new here (My first post yesterday: http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/12/138721/1.ashx) and I've noticed only one thing that I don't have in common with a few people here.

I'm breaking free of my beliefs after more than thirty years and I feel great. I feel calm, free and in control.

I feel no anger, resentment or hate towards my so-called brothers and sisters or towards the FDS or the organization. I don't see the point, it doesn't help me any. Part of my treatment for defeating depression was to let go of any resentment towards my family and I've learned that resentment is toxic. Once I stopped being angry I started healing.

Now I've noticed there are some here who seem very resentful and angry. Are you? If so, why?

P.S. I got a full eight hours sleep last night and woke up refreshed for the first time in years. I feel more alive than I ever have before. Wow!

daystar

Well, orgull, we are all at different points in the logarithmic spiral of our healing processes.

OnTheWayOut

Part of my treatment for defeating depression was to let go of any resentment towards my family and I've learned that resentment is toxic. Once I stopped being angry I started healing.

You were taught something and were good at applying it. Some of us have not
been taught how to do that, or are unable to apply it as easy as you. Before anyone
tells you their reasons for bitterness or anger, how they SHOULD STAY angry, I will
agree with you. It just ain't so easy for everyone. Apparently, it was important for
your health, so you readily applied your lessons.

Otherwise, welcome to the forum. Some of the questions that will be asked of you-
Are you DF'ed or DA'ed or even ever got baptized?
Does anyone shun you?
How much exposure to JW's does your daily life have?

Stuff like the above questions makes a difference. Don't let any of us bitter ex-JW's
bully you out of your good feelings, though. Great for you. Rock on, Orgull.

megsmomma

I don't ALWAYS feel bitter or angry.....Just sometimes it does get to me when I realise I can't call my own mom and talk to her because she is shunning me, or that my daughter won't know her grandma because grandma thinks she will die in Armegeddon soon.

For the most part though, I feel a huge sense of relief that my life is not controlled by men anymore and it is a huge weight off my shoulders.

Orgull

I'm baptized 19 years, still in good standing (lol).

Haven't walked away yet. The idea is very new to me. It's taking some time to adjust. Like jumping in the deep end of the pool!

nvrgnbk

You'll notice if you read the posts of some of us, myself included, we're not angry or bitter. Just hurt and disappointed.

The occasional angry word comes when we think about how we've lost opportunities or family due to our association and subsequent lack thereof with the JW cult.

Glad you're feeling so good about things Orgull.

Paralipomenon

Many leaving go through the same steps as grieving. Factor in what step people are at in relation to their posting here.

Denial: Unlikely to be posting. Lurking, reading, not believing what they read
Anger: I would guess many are in this stage because the topic is so inflamitory
Bargaining: Not sure if this would apply
Depression: The loss of faith coupled with the wasted years can be crippling
Acceptance: Ready to move forward, many will stop posting.

So the sum of that is that you have alot of angry and depressed posters. How easy is it to move past anger when you keep getting the wound opened up? Some get trapped in an endless cycle of rage at witnessing the injustices being posted over and over.

People do go through the steps, though the most visible to the average poster will be anger and I can see how that may be perceived as the dominate attitude of the board.

Some after hitting acceptance stay around to enjoy the friendships they made and to help others through the steps. Most though I would say move on.

Just my two cents on the topic

Open mind

Hi there Orgull,

OTWO made some good points. You and I are somewhat similar. I'm in "good standing" (LOL) but have a JW-loyal wife and kids. I don't share a lot of anger and bitterness that many others have because I haven't been forced to eat the bitter fruit just yet.

If/when I lose my spouse, children and very large extended family to this religion, I'll likely be singing a different tune. I hope that doesn't happen, but I'm not naive enough to think it can't happen to me.

I'm very happy for you that you (I assume) don't have a spouse & kids wrapped up in this. Good for you. Keep reading and posting. It's the best thing I've ever done.

Open Mind

GoingGoingGone

Welcome, Orgull! Congratulations on your recovery from depression and the WTS!

I'm usually not angry or bitter, but I often feel hurt. I'm not DF'd or DA'd, but I've pretty much lost every friend I ever had and put my marriage in mortal peril by leaving the JWs. It hurts me to realize that people I considered my friends can ignore and avoid me simply because I've stopped going to meetings. I'm "bad association", apparantly.

But the freedom is something I wouldn't trade for anything! I have freedom of thought, and on JWD, I have freedom of speech, too!

GGG

Marcel

@orgull

keep that up, pal! thats the right way. some others do have problems dont being angry on someone who lied to them. but you're completely right. its toxic!

I don't feel angry or resentful, do you?

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