It takes a great deal of strength to stay in to keep your family intact. I wouldn't be too concerned about feeling like a hypocrite. In my opinion, I would consider it "Spiritual Warfare" to save my family.
staying "in Truth" for family--is it worth it?...hyporcrite needing help
by oompa 62 Replies latest watchtower bible
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unique1
You say you are on 5 meds. Are you possibly Bi Polar. Don't answer that if you are, but if you are, tell them you went off a few of your meds and went through a manic phase which led you to post on here. You eventually realized you were going out of control and started them back again and are trying to be a good little witness. I know many witnesses that were BiPolar and who would go through their manic phases. They don't think straight or rationally. You could always use that as a crutch to get you through this.
Or you could just say F it all.
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mentalclearness
I'm one of those people who think things happen for a reason...so maybe you should see this as your opportunity to speak openly to the elders about your doubts..they most likely will try to convince you to study with one of them and "convince" yourself more of "the truth"...I don't believe being dishonest will help you any..It usually makes matters worse..and speak to your family first about it..Explain what's going on with you...I'm not saying you'll get the best response, but I think you are adult enough to face the consequences...eventually the things you do catch up with you...you really never know how things will turn out...there are so many scenarios that could happen...hang in there and try to be strong..don't back down just because of the elders..
and if it's not to indiscreet....how were you outed?? -
changeling
Whoever turned you in is lurking on this site, isn't that against the rules?
changeling
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erandir
Tell 'em they are a bunch of paranoid, pharisaical stormtroopers trying to pick on an easy target to feed their overly developed sense of self-importance and power-hungry, ambitious, non-loving, gluttonous appetites. Tell 'em to leave you alone and play the I-am-suffering-from-depression and I'm-spiritually-weak cards. Deny and/or avoid the online/apostate website thing. Ask them which hypocrite was it who went on an obviously apostate website to hunt down this information in the first place...all the while not admitting any of their "evidence" pertains to you.
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oompa
sometimes fading is just not a good option....not was not healthy for me....because if you are a good fader you are always looking over your shoulder....which means you are actually AFRAID of the consequences of of being FOUND OUT OR SEEN by people of some certain religion part of what is supposed to be YOU and YOUR DREAMS...everytime that happens you are losing a part of your very own identity...and now i have the freedom to actually make my own dreams for the first time EVER! my own dream was not even my own....it was a dream "inculcated" into my heart and brain...the dream was to live forever in paradise if you look at the glass half.....the dream was to somehow be good enough that jehovah did not turn me into birdfood with ALL the rest of humanity at humanity at armageddon that are not lucky enough to be Jehovahs Witnesses if the glass is half full
it took awhile...but i am totally free now....im not scared or afraid anymore of ANYTHING related to jw...the price continues to be stunningly high for me...but it is worth every penny....for me that he is will
maybe my son who just got reinstated and hopes to fade will be sucessful...it really does not bother anymore that basically me he loves his friends and family so much that he has suffered through over a year of meetings to get to this point...most know there is almost no chance he will be LEFT ALONE by the elders who so so loathe me and are probably getting scared to death now (since so far after a year not a single jw has QUIT working for Satan/Oompa despite a lot of pressure .....and he is in love and in a committed relationship with a nice NORMAL girl....amaing how much more influence people lacking penis can have on a young jw...thank you bessie....i am counting on her....and she knows a LOT more about JWs now that we are friends....and friends on good ol FB....and have had serious long talks now...and i have assured her as best i can he is really totally out mentally...but she is STILL worried...and now i get to see how my son is going to feel when he has to choose to discriminate against me or not
like yesterday when he went to a segrated swimming pool....that is how i felt sitting in my new baddass jeep unlimited two door i just had deliverted from OK....when i wanted to take him and his gf up to a beutiful mountain lake atop hangin g rock state park...and he decided to go to a big party at his moms....she does not mind to work for her exhusband who has pretty much taken care of her these past 15 years...but she sure does not want me swimming in her JW's ONLY swimming pool with my son and parents and old friends...i pulled up across the street from her house i bought her years ago...the yard was full of jw cars i recognized just like my old parties...i so wanted to just drive around the house...say hi and hug everybody i could....and JUMP in the damm pool with my hot 18 year old ex jw friend me and my boys get to hang out with...dont worry all i have a personal age limit not set in stone of 30 years old...................oompa
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elderelite
Oomp, i read your posts with interest and have seen you speak of the price you pay. ... I can also understand when speak of fading and looking over your shoulder.
But theres fading and then there is fading.... Its not the same for everyone. No two people experiance is going to be the same. I agree that living in fear is no way to live.... But if nominally playing cult rules gets you a certain level of comfort, thats not fear. Thats enlightened self interest.
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Pistoff
I have faded for 10 years, have it down to a science.
There is a price to fading, including not being able to say what you think, or openly get involved in politics, or join another faith.
For me, still, right at this moment, fading is still the way.
I am not sure it will be forever though; I would love to be honest.
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