"All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth" My daughter and I laughed ourselves silly over that one.
BP
Funniest / Goofiest songs you ever heard
by Nosferatu 32 Replies latest jw friends
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horrible life
Tile :Joe Tex - Gonna Bump No More (With No Big Fat Women)
This is lyrics from www.lyrics007.com
Three nights ago I was at a disco
Man, I wanted to bump, I was rarin' to go
And this big fat woman, bumped me on the floor
She was rarin' to go, that chick was rarin' to go
Then she did a dip, almost broke my hip
She was gettin' down, that chick was gettin' down
She wanted to bump some more, but I told her, "no!"
You done knocked me down once
You done knocked me down once
Said if you want to dance find you a big fat man
Y'all both can get on down, y'all both can get on down
Huh!
Chorus:
I ain't gonna bump no more with no big fat woman
I ain't gonna bump no more with no big fat woman
I ain't gonna bump no more with no big fat woman
I ain't gonna bump no more with no big fat woman
Lord, I ain't gonna bump no more with no big fat woman
I ain't gonna bump no more with no big fat woman
I ain't gonna bump no more with no big fat woman
I ain't gonna bump no more with no big fat woman
Somebody take her
She's too big for me
She'll knock me down
She came over to me, snatched me out of my seat
She wanted to get on down, still wanted to get on down
I told her to go on and leave me alone
I ain't gettin' down
You done hurt my hip once
I know what you'll do
I ain't gonna bump with you!
I don't feel like gettin' down
Don't feel like gettin' down
She just shook her head at every word I said
She wanted to get on down
That woman wanted to get on down
She did that dip again and I hit the floor again
She was gettin' down, Lord, that woman was gettin' down
(Chorus)
Somebody take her, I don't want her
She done hurt my hip, she done knocked me down
Done hurt my hip, she done knocked me down
Somebody take her, I don't want her
Say Leroy! You can have this one dude
This big fat woman, dude
I don't want her -
deeskis
She used to call me baby... I thought she was such a lady
But my how things have changed since times moved on
I gave her my last dollar... And now all she'll do is holler
Oh my life has become a country song
I've learned she can resist me by the way she always disses me
And comes to bed at night, with that cold cream on
Sometimes I might feel frisky but these days it's just too risky
It's Hard To Kiss The Lips At Night That Chew Your Ass Out All Day Long
All day Long
It goes all day long
If a tree fell in the forest, She didn't hear it, would I still be wrong
I guess I should admit it
She ain't never gonna quit it
It's Hard To Kiss The Lips At Night That Chew Your Ass Out All Day Long
Spoken Voice:
Man I remember when her eyes used to be so blue and shiny
God you oughtta see what's happened to her hiney
(Her what?) her hiney
Man that thing is big enough to land a small plane on.
(Small plane?) I'm tellin' ya
I used to roll her in the the clover, (mmm hmm) but my god those days are over
(Hallelulia!)
It's Hard To Kiss The Lips At Night That Chew Your Ass Out All Day Long
All day Long
She goes all day long
If some day they drop the big one,
I'd say sweet Jesus, She's gonna finally leave me alone
It's alright if we say it
'cause the radio won't play it.
It's Hard To Kiss The Lips At Night That Chew Your Ass Out All Day Long
It's Hard To Kiss The Lips At Night That Chew Your Ass Out All Day Long -
Mrs Smith
Don't worry be happy
Here's a little song I wrote
I hope you learn it note for note
Don't worry
Be happy
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brinjen
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SEkglpOTVCw&mode=related&search= - Lilly Allen 'Knock 'Em Out'
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=blO3EtP_D10 - The Tenants - 'You S*** Me To Tears' (warning, lots of course language)
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Nosferatu
A crazy song-You can't roller scate in a Buffalo herd.
Got it! I also have "My uncle used to love me but she died" by Roger Miller. "Chug-a-lug" is pretty good too.
Dead Skunk in the Middle of the Road
Great tune! A bit of trivia - the singer, Loudon Wainwright III appeared in the TV show MASH for one season.
How about the Tennessee Bird Walk
Is it me, or does everyone own the Kooky Kountry album?
I'm currently listening to Green Jelly's 333 album. Carnage Rules is a great tune! I love what's on the back of the album: "All tracks published by We Get Sued For Our Music/Chrysalis Music"
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LaniB
Barney's on fire by Weird Al
Happened one day in the studio
Dancing around in a do-si-do
The purple monstrosity was waving his arms
We were falling victim to his evil charms
He brushed against a candle and he started to smoke
And now we're all laughing at the dinosaur joke
Oh boy, Barney's on fire!
It's what we've always desired
We'll watch the flames get higher
Just don't try to put him out
(kids sayin "kill him" in the background)
Purple fur was flying ashes everywhere
And all of the kids just continued to stare
The guy inside the suit, he started to yell
We probably should've helped him but what the hell
He threw himself violently against the wall
He fell to his knees and he tried to crawl away
Oh Boy, Barney's on fire!
This is our secret desire
We'll help the flames burn brighter
But dont you try to put him out
(break it down for me fellas!)
Barney: I love you...you love me
(Barney Screaming)
Oh boy, Barney's on fire!
This is what we've always desired
Wont you help us fan the flames higher
And you better not try to put him out
Barney's no longer ignited
We're feeling somewhat slighted
He's laying in a heap on the floor
We poked him with a stick cause we had to be sure he was dead -
LaniB
Sorry, computer hiccups
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purplesofa
just a swangin
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Shawn10538
This song deserves a thread of its own, as well as a grammy and any other award there might be:
Bohemian Polka by Wierd Al!!!!!!!!
