((((maddie))))
<<<<<<<BFD
It will get better.
What's the point of it all anyway??
by Maddie 29 Replies latest social relationships
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BFD
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ex-nj-jw
((((((((((((((((((((((Maddie)))))))))))))))))))) Hang in there hun, it will get better. Then you just be a regular old nut like the rest of us!
nj
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BizzyBee
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nvrgnbk
As Epicurus wrote to Menoeceus:
"Accustom yourself to believing that death is nothing to us, for good and evil imply the capacity for sensation, and death is the privation of all sentience; therefore a correct understanding that death is nothing to us makes the mortality of life enjoyable, not by adding to life a limitless time, but by taking away the yearning after immortality. For life has no terrors for him who has thoroughly understood that there are no terrors for him in ceasing to live."
Even Satanists who believe in the existence of other metaphysical beings do not worship them. They still believe that it is our actions while we are here on Earth which ultimately determine our ability to 'be' something, not how much we can masochistically sacrifice to a higher being. Most forms of "knowledge" that we acquire are either a priori or a posteriori. Since there is no way that we can identify where the origins of life began, if someone/thing created them, or if someone/thing did create them, it did so with a specific purpose, we can safely say that the most important thing to concentrate on is the fact that we're here.
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joelbear69
life, after we have found a way to survive,
is about seeking out what makes you happy
this is normally a mixture of doing things for yourself,
doing things for those you love, and doing things for
people in general. -
Maddie
I have been thinking about everything and am trying to keep it in the day. "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery". This saying is used by people in Recovery Programmes for addictions. It is a good way of coping and one that I am going to try to apply to the "JW syndrom" that I have. I think that the FDS make us co-dependent on them and this a sickness which is very hard to overcome and recover from. Breaking away from any co-dependent relationship is painful and this one has stopped me growing emotionally ( stunted growth). Addictions do the same thing, whether it's alcohol or drugs. They seem to be a really good and trustworthy friend to begin with by giving a false sense of well-being and escape from the horrors of reality. In the end though they take everything from you and more - family, friends, emotional and mental stability, until they destroy you totally. Many people have overcome their "demons" and found themselves again. So there is life after the borg - just one day at a time.
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mentalclearness
I know one thing that has helped me alot besides a couple of great friends to give some sound perspective, is really not giving so much importance to the "purpose". As jw's we're raised to really always concentrate on the end result. But actually the journey is the reward. Instead of seeing it as a negative thing, try to see all the new opportunities and possibilities available to you now. Make a list of all the things you wanted to do and still want to do and try to make steps to achieve those goals. Live your life today. I think that's the most difficult concept to grasp once you are out. But once you do let go of the necessity to have that "Purpose" driving you, it's very liberating.
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mentalclearness
and give yourself a break. Don't be so hard on yourself...everything is a process. You aren't going to know all the answers and feel comfortable in your new situation over night...it's o.k. to take your time and really think about your values, beliefs, future...just try to stay positive and remember this stage is temporary. You will find your own way in life and you'll have the satisfaction of knowing that it really is "your" way and not someone else telling you how to think....hang in there....
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dogisgod
Maddie, I've been where you are at. Just float on your stream and not swim against it. Something that really helped me in a big way was that someone dumped a 1 yr old rottweiler in my yard. I didn't really know a lot about dogs although we had them growing up. I started taking this dog, Bear, to training and we kept going thru reg training, to agility, to qualifying for him to be a Therapy dog to visit people in hospitals etc. He opened many doors to me and I've met many good people thru him. He was the very best thing that EVER happened to me. Get yourself into something you like. You can focus on that have goals and as time passes your feeling of depair will lessen greatly and you will find you can enjoy life. The very sadddest thing I ever experienced was that my ass...e neighbors let their intact male pittbull run loose and he dug under my fence and killed Bear. It was worse than when my father died suddenly. I sued them. It took two years and I lost the case. In Washington state pets have no intrinsic value. So I lost my shirt to the attorneys (still have my bra) but now am working to change the State law.
Go to plays, join a community theatre, get up and out.
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dogisgod
Maddie, I forgot one more thing. Take self defense classes. Great workout and you learn that you are worth defending and you can do it yourself. Nothing is more empowing that knowing you can kick some elders ass (metaphorically speaking) if he tries judging you. I really helps your self confidence.