Someone else new & could do with as much help as they can get. (page 2)

changeling

Welcome to the board!

Thank you so much for sharing with us. I can tell it took a lot out of you.

You have had a very hard life and it's to your credit that you function at all. Please, please, please, see a mental health professional. A good therapist can help you unravell all that you've been through and teach you some healthy coping skills.

Feel free to unburden yourself here with us but realize that most of us are not trained professionals.

This I can promise you: It does get better.

Hang in there,

changeling

darth frosty

I understand your situation. Its kinda hard when you are a 30-40 year old man realizing that his entire way of thinking and beliefs are now in question. The key thing to remember is there is hope. The easy thing to do is continue on the path you know, the hard thing is to make your own. I have chosen the latter. What you must do is remove the witness program and reprogram your self.

Personally I have always found comfort and strength in books. I will recomend three here The first is Anthony De Mello's 'the way to love'. This book allowed me to look at certain gospel versus in a whole new light. The second is 'the alchemist' by paulo Coelho. It is a great little story about following your dreams. The last is 'I'm a man thats my job' by frank kermit. Its a book that basically details the true nature of life for men.

These books really helped me appreciate the way of life and helped me to re-organize and reprogram my personal beliefs.

AWAKE&WATCHING

W E L C O M E

Wow, did you ever come to the right place. When I discovered the truth was lies about 6 months ago I was in shock for about 3 weeks, I've been pissed, I've been sad, and I've wanted to go postal.

This is your new home, we all are very supportive of one another.

Take a deep breath and take it one day at a time.

It is possible to be happy.

mouthy

Welcome MM

Great that you found us. I understand what you are feeling. When they kicked me off the "ARK" I wanted to kill myself. But listen sweetie. My life has never been this good. So hang in there. It will get better. I did go to a Christian Counsellor( I didnt know she was a Christian at the time) but her help was so wonderful, to cry, complain,laugh etc:: I figuered I was going nuts- so I had to do something, Maybe you could do that.! If not just type away on here,They are the most wonderful bunch I promise you. It is UNCONDITIONAL LOVE- Some times you will come across a troll-but on the Whole you will be happy to be part of the family.... I am the Granny on board( 80) & you know what Grannies are!!!!! prayerers. You say you dont believe any more ---that is O.K. a lot on here dont. But I do so darling here goes....

"Father please look out for a new member on this "our family" of Ex JW's .You know the turmoil he is going through, he feels alone, but I know you never really take your "eyes" off us IF we wish you to help us. I am asking for MM,help ,guide, refresh him I ask it in the name above all others JESUS CHRIST.AMEN" Stay with us I wont push you to accept Grannys way((((((((((((HUGS)))))))

OnTheWayOut

Welcome, Mr. M. I am bitter at WTS and can understand that. I can also empathize with
your feeling like you are just back at the point that made you walk into the hall. I am fading
from the religion, I don't just walk away for family's sake. I had some problems 20 years ago
that I never really got the help I needed for. I thought "the truth" was the help I needed. Well,
now that I know the deception of "the truth" I feel that I never addressed my original problems.

It sounds like you might actually be clinically depressed. I, myself, have a family that are not
JW to support me. I have coworkers who are great friends, so I am a bit slower to go to a
therapist. I am starting to realize that I should probably go, anyway. I am not quite back at
point A. I have grown and changed, I am sure you have also. My current problem is that I am
stuck without a desire to move forward anymore. I am obsessed with this forum and with
reading about Witnesses History and Witnesses flaws. I felt that other people here were
putting me on a pedestal as an ideal example of fading. I had to show some of my own
shortcomings because I felt, inside, like a wreck- I think my advice for other faders tapered
down a bit.

Well, I am able to realize that I am not "stuck." What's happening is that I am growing toward
strengthening myself for losing my former support system. I still will go to therapy when I am
ready, but I realize that I am allowed to dwell on my problem for awhile. If it takes me a few
years to "get over" my cult experience, that's okay as long as I can go to work and earn a
living and find joys every day (well, most every day). If you can't find a reason to get out of
bed, get help right away. If you feel like hurting yourself, call a hotline or go to an emergency
room. At least go to a regular doctor and see if you should get medication for depression.

You are welcome to keep posting and ask all you want.

AK - Jeff

Some need therapy. Some don't. It seems as if your emotional dysfunction is serious enough to merit such help.

I got mine right here on JWD, but the inability to grow my friendship base continues in similar fashion. I had invested all my years of active memory to the organization until I was 48 years old. I am now beginning to trust people for what they are instead of labeling them. But it takes time. Grace made a good suggestion on the Christian counselor.

Many here have sought such counselling to begin with. Especially if you feel any manic-depressive symptoms, you may wish to do so. Those who have gone thru the therapy can certainly point you in the correct direction.

It is good to have you on the board. Thanx for sharing and keep us up to date as to how the 're-entry' is going.

Jeff

Hortensia

hello my dear! First of all, stop calling it "the truth." It isn't true, which is part of the problem. Also, get some counselling - smartest thing I ever did. You might have to try a few counselors, but find someone who can help you reframe your life and move forward. Find ways to be in contact with nice "worldly" people. Work, social organizations, volunteer, find a way to get out of yourself. And finally, don't give up. Things will get better, and you'll replace the old life with something better.

flipper

Mr. Majestic- A warm welcome to you my friend. Mr. & Mrs. Flipper welcome you to the board ! Thank you for sharing your story. I'm so sorry you had to go through what you did. You have come to a safe place here where we all have a lot in common, and that is most here are ex-witnesses. Some have gone through sexual abuse as children, physical abuse like yourself, psychological abuse as you did . Most people here show much love and caring in their posts to you and we want you to know , we care. Please be deeply assured of that. Some have advised you to seek professional counseling and I agree this is an excellent idea. There are trained professionals who will be able to assess your particular situation to help you deal with your inner emotions and turbulent thoughts you are having. Please be aware of our deepest sympathies for what you have endured, but my friend you will make it. Lots of loving thoughts are out to you tonight and in the future. By the way, I think your avatar name is cool! Has a good ring to it ! Mr. Majestic. Nice. Peace to you my friend, Mr. & Mrs. Flipper

RisingEagle

Mr Majestic

Thank you so much for your introduction. I know from my own experience that it takes a certain amount of intestinal fortitude to take the step of a first post. I hope that you will continue to post because you are certainly amongst many that have been where you are now. Something you said:

But the problem is that the past has not been healed, and the void and isolation, the total lack of emotional input means that I am in no way capable of integrating into a world that I have been in fear of all my life. So many barriers and no allies.

In time you will see that the barriers aren't so insurmountable and as for allies look at the numerous posts above mine. When I began to write this response there were at least a dozen of the smartest and kindest allies that an ex-jw could wish for making themselves known and entering your corner.

Welcome and I hope to see you often,

Chris

Tigerman

It smells.

Someone else new & could do with as much help as they can get.

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