fade, fade, fade, fade, fade, fade, fade.................drop out

oompa

Last week was a bit of a milestone. Missed the entire CO visit for the first time. Son went out every day I think, plus pioneer meeting, plus MS meeting, plus three other meeting (I know they call it five). Since this CO was so helpful on lighting my pathway, you would think I might hear something. Since I pre-empted and asked the elders over at least a month ago I have "dropped out" of JW. We hear a lot about the fade, and of course there are no 12 steps for it, but everyone has just left me alone and I LIKE IT! Once in awhile we see posts of people that just STOP. This seems to be even better than the fade, because eventually fade leads to STOP anyway.

If you are fading as I once was, without even knowing it since I had not been at JWD yet, why not try the drop out and just STOP? Yes, I finally had to have the sitdown with my wife and let her know that right now, at this moment in time, she is own her own (as far as JW), and even that was a relief. She took it way better than I thought she would. She said "We all go through changes in life." Any takers??.....oompa

and just to get more people to see this, I will be posting details of my sex life this past month in this thread!!!! sex sells

zeroday

but everyone has just left me alone and I LIKE IT!

That's good oompa and I hope it works for you. I was going to go the fade path but I realized for me it would never work. I had to many family and long time friends on the inside (25+ years) to think it would work. I took the DA path and have never regreted it. You have to find your own path and i wish you "GOOD LUCK" (oh damn I blew it now)...

R.F.

Oompa, i'm glad this is working for you and I wish you the best on this.

Now that I really think about it, I didn't do a fade at all, I just stopped completely. I was active at all the meetings and pioneering, then the next week I was gone. I guess that for me when dealing with the BOE and getting out of ~~priveleges~~ burdens was the process that I found the most challenging. Other than that, just severing all JW activities completely can definitely work.

There are different circumstances for each individual that requires them to fade slowly.

R.F.

oompa

Radio Flyer: There are different circumstances for each individual that requires them to fade slowly.

Now that's what I'm talking about. Since I was not intentionally fading, when everybody knew where I stood, I just dropped out, even though I had already graduated from the KM School. What would require anyone to fade slowly, if STOPPING is the ultimate destination of the FADE? What are these circumstances? Is it mainly for their own psyke to adjust or what?..........oompa

Magick

i have been fading for the past 8 years. just recently, let's say withing the last few months...i have been going through a spiritual crisis. i want a final end, a clean break, a severing. it's been like being seperated with your spouse...having nothing to do with them but still not divorced. i don't feel free.

the fading is important to keep communication open with family members. but, if you have family members that aren't so dogmatic and would still associate with you even if you da'd that would be cool.

i really dislike the term *ex-jw" because it still has "jw" in it. i just want to be ME! no X no JW.

as long as you're fading you will be fair game for do-gooders who want to help bring you back.

i'm just sick of fading....i've faded so much that i'm invisible now (to everyone).

shopaholic

I thought fading was the same thing as dropping out without da'ing or df'ing. Going to random meetings and not going in service is being "inactive", so I thought. Well, based on oompa's definition, I dropped out as well since I completely stopped even the occasional meeting since July. After awhile, I just got tired of the nonsense. Not to highjack the thread but sometimes I wonder if they df'd me in absentia.

R.F.

Now that's what I'm talking about. Since I was not intentionally fading, when everybody knew where I stood, I just dropped out, even though I had already graduated from the KM School. What would require anyone to fade slowly, if STOPPING is the ultimate destination of the FADE? What are these circumstances? Is it mainly for their own psyke to adjust or what?..........oompa

When you referred to "Radio Flyer", I assume you're talking to me.

Some fade mainly for family, from what I understand. I think the only reason I was able to stop completely was because of a few circumstances that happened at the time I started my fade that put the idea that i'm "depressed" into people's minds. Otherwise, I think i'd be termed a "fader" right now.

R.F.

JK666

Oompa,

Congrats on the successful drop out!

Since you are going to update us on your sex life the past month, I will go ahead and tell everyone the details of mine below:

JK

oompa

Stop That JK...lol....Dont make me discuss how quickly you are able to get right back in the saddle again. From your pms you are the freaking Rhinesone Cowboy!!!!........yyyyeeeeehaaaaaa.............oompa

I think radio flyer is cute btw

flipper

OOMPA- Glad to hear you were able to talk with your wife. Sounds like she took it pretty good, so far. Watch for the boomerang that might come back and catch you on the backside though ! Just be cool, be smart as I know you will be. I stopped all of a sudden 4 years ago, and never went back. I was too pissed at unjust elders , and for me it was a matter of the straw breaking the camels back . Enough was enough, I was done . Good luck my friend , may you have peace,peace out, Mr. Flipper

fade, fade, fade, fade, fade, fade, fade.................drop out

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