ROFL @ IsaacJ
1925.....we never said that....we did?....oh well lets just act like we never said it....that'll work. If anyone asks, DF 'em.
Sirona
Top Ten Lame Excuses Why The Watchtower Society Predictions Never Came True
by Homerovah the Almighty 31 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
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Homerovah the Almighty
Righteously funny people
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glenster
It happened invisibly.
I didn't say it would happen. Too many of you thought it would.
Stupid people--stupid, stupid, stupid. (Sorry--that's "Plan 9....")
The king of the north will come from true north, not compass north.
There is no year "0" between the BC and AD years.
There was, but it happened invisibly.
I didn't notice the context of the quote.
It is happening, but it's just starting to happen--this could take years.
Maybe I got the right event but the wrong time, or the right time but the
wrong event.
I got that from Barbour--you can't trust people like that.
I got that from Russell and the pyramid--he wasn't in the light and the
pyramid was built on secret orders from Satan.
I got that from Rutherford--there was less light then. You don't want too
much light at once--you could burn a retina.
I thought it was the spirit descending like a dove but it was a carrier
pigeon.
I got it from the light but they didn't have anisotropic filtering back then.
I didn't notice the context of the quote--not enough light.
I thought it was an angel of the Lord but it was a cross dresser from Las
Vegas.
You won't see it as in "see" it--you'll sense it.
Don't trust your senses, listen to us--we'll tell you what to sense.
I thought the flip side of Jude was Revolution.
I never understood a single word he said, but I helped him drinkin' the wine.
Too many worldly people gave off skeptical vibrations and I couldn't perform.
I've been having premature exclamations lately.
Jesus turned his attention to Omaha and our headquarters are in Brooklyn.
Earthquakes got worse, but just where Jesus was looking.
The 129,999th person cut ahead in the line so we made him go back to the end.
There is no year "0" between 1999 and 2000.
Henschel was around in 1914 and isn't leaving till Jesus arrives--could
someone take this out of here? -
MsMcDucket
God was just testing your faith! Due to your *works* and faith, God decide to give the world another chance!
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JK666
The Governing Body spends more time rolling their poop into little balls than listening to Holy Spirit.
JK
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Homerovah the Almighty
We run the organization with a psychosis of fear therefore we can not be held responsible for what we say !
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Homerovah the Almighty
Well said Glenster
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Farkel
You know why Armageddon never happened in 1975? It's because YOU wanted it to happen! - Fred Franz actually said that at an assembly
Maybe Armageddon didn't happen in 1975 because Jehovah was testing us. - My Mother (uh, Mom, having your true(tm) organization make a false prophecy to "test" people makes God a God of promoting lies.)
True, Armageddon didn't come in 1925, but just look how EXCITED it made the Brothers and Sisters about it.
Pastor Russell made the wrong prediction about the Elect being carried to Heaven in 1914 because he was too distracted by having to spend too much of his time screwing Maria Russell out of her rightful share of property and alimony during their divorce.
Judge Rutherford "trusted Jehovah" to get him safely through Armageddon, but felt he had to build his private bomb shelter in Beth Shan just to cover his bases, and just in case the Japs bombed San Diego. That he kept this fact secret from everyone but his inner circle was due to the Biblical principle of "theocratic war strategy." Literally!
Nathan Knorr "prophesied" that a United Nations Organization would be founded after the end of WWII. Amazingly, and with Jehovah's blessing of course, he did this just two years AFTER articles in the newspapers announced that the Charter of the United Nations was already being written and discussed.
Farkel
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Homerovah the Almighty
Thanks for your comment Farkel
Being honest and truthful about this organization is the best way to expose it for really what it is......thanks again HTA
Honesty is the best policy
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ESTEE
Sirona wrote:
1925.....we never said that....we did?....oh well lets just act like we never said it....that'll work. If anyone asks, DF 'em.
Yup, this sounds like wt reasoning. ROFL!!!! To-o-o-o-o-oo funny!!!
ESTEE