by oompa 29 Replies latest jw friends
Aww, Oompa, next time you want to run away, run North to Owen Sound. I will make you something good to eat, we'll have a good talk, and then I will hug you and send you back home feeling strong again.
I know you must feel like this is all just a bad dream and wondering when on earth are you going to wake up? Now is the time to start building that network of friends outside of the closed community you have been a part of.
I can't help myself here. The most absurd statement I ever heard from the platform at the District Convention...." JEHOVAHS PEOPLE ARE HAPPY PEOPLE"..... clap clap clap .Hey, don't worry about your life from here on out. Bekieve me, You are going to be a HAPPY person once you distant yourself from the DUBS.
There is nothing normal at all about the JW culture. To be a true JW is to distance yourself from almost every aspect of normal life Welcome to the real world now.
And THIS is "IT" in a nutshell!
MY first reaction when I finally realized that I had been duped and lied to for 30 years---was while fighting the disbelief of it ALL, was a feeling a very real and intense pain in my gut. I felt as if I had truly been kicked in the midsection by a horse. I just wanted "it" to go away and I holed up in solitude and silence (except online) until I could come to grips with "it" and figure out what I would do. I did not even tell my husband what I had discovered (and uncovered) about the WTS for a few months.
As praticing and active JWs----we WERE the freaks---and each step AWAY from all those peculiar and unpopular beliefs was, for me, another step TOWARDS normalcy. I "sat on" this knowledge for months before I began to flex my "normal" muscles and take my stand back within the human race.
It takes time to reprogram all the thoughts you were accustomed to believing and being TOLD were "pleasing to God"....and to take stock in what you DO accept and believe and can live by now.There IS no reason to try and "rush" this transition period---we all have to go at our own pace and decide what is best for US. Go at it ---at whatever is good and comfortable for YOU. We are always here for advice, empathy for having "been there", and offering encouragement when needed. As one poster here recently told ME---we'll leave the light on for ya!
Oompa...I am SURE you are going to be fine---having a good sense of humor helps immensely, and we have seen that in you from the gitgo! Hang in there my friend!
extra hugs,
Annie
Hell yeah,. There is nothing normal at all about the JW culture. To be a true JW is to distance yourself from almost every aspect of normal life Welcome to the real world now.
Dave.
Amen !! Pull the curtain back and the "Faceless Diseased Slave" is revealed.
What I wanted to say Cognizant has said, summed up beautifully with that book title Wherever You Go, There You Are. You're a one eyed man in the land of the blind. Most importantly you have responsibilities and loved ones who'll be heartbroken and confused if you walk out on them. Running away will I'm sure only multiply your angst. Be strong Mr.Hunchback, and let the story unfold.
Hang in there.
I remember
purps
Marmot: I think if you just stay yourself and ease into the new non-witness you around your family that it won't be so hard or so painful as you imagine it to be. You've got a family that loves you, and I'm sure they'll still love you no matter what you choose.------------and
(after all you've got a wife and kid, a motorcycle and, well, a life - whereas I'm a 25-year-old virgin living alone in a basement apartment with no remaining friends within 2000 kilometers except for my dog)
Marmot, i like your style. I am finding the "easing into" quite painful and uncofortable so far. She says she will love me regardless, but I am not sure if it true or if it will work both ways. This morining before she went to study her CLIMAX (i wish), I ask her to be curious about a few things, as i had studied it and the last couple (FDS crap). Immediate tears....and "please don't talk to me about this...talk to your Dad...I don't thing you want help...you just want to be critical....." When you can not even say ONE CRAPPIN THING about anything you have learned.....something in me starts to feel this is hopless....unless I can accept HER like this. I have really toned it down the past few months....tried planting little seeds....but I am on solid rock, not soil (ha ha).
As far as your situation.... you definately need to get a guitar and get laid....not necessarily in that order. You should start with a lady nearly twice your age, as you have a lot of catching up in know-how-to-do- things. And maybe get a cat instead of getting too friendly with that dog you horny virgin you... WOOF WOOF!
Immediate tears....and "please don't talk to me about this
She's scared.
It sucks.
CogniDis: To help with the "freaking out", try to stay in the present moment as much as possible. Do not allow your thoughts to wander to the future and to catastrophize imaginary scenarios. Yes they are imaginary. You do not know what the future will bring. It just may surprise you. In the present moment, when we deal only with what is happening right now, it is all manageable.
This may not work for me Cog...I have always been a dreamer....and this works pretyy good now because I don't like "THE PRESENT MOMENT." I had rather wander to the future with thoughts of a much better time, and yeah it probably will surpirse me, and be better, cause I really expect it to be a sucky experience. I will give you book a check-out, but that "Kabat-Zinn" name is kinda FREAKY and generally don't like hyphenated names!...........oompa
