by leaving-jws 59 Replies latest jw experiences
Thanks for posting. Your feelings are very common and I hope you get comfort from this site.
Your mother is very normal for a JW, but once you become free from the mind control it is very hard to comprehend such insane reasoning. It is unlikely that you will be able to change her thinking, so it just takes time to come to live with accepting family members as they are, as infuriating and sad as it seems.
Hi and welcome,
We were told not to have children, pioneered for 8 years, finally it got to much for my wife, being told to forsake having children. Now we have 3 lovely children. Do not listen to them after all your mum had children
llbh
Hi JWLeaver, it is reassuring to read how clearly you think. When in the JWs they attempt to weave answers around every possible question one could ask no matter how implausible it is. The longer you are in the less liable you are to question odd points of faith. Eventually there is such a number of them upon which all the infrastructure rests that it becomes impossible to take it as a system of positive thinking. It rests heavily in the mind. At this points you become aware that your soul does not wish to foist this upon unsuspecting householders and so you can't wholeheartedly go preaching lovelessness that you feel! It is healthy that you have other people to network with because usually the lack of 'others' is what rapes ones emotional/social esteem to the extent that you are press ganged into remaining a slave of WT government and unable to integrate into regular society.
Welcome, so many here (including me!) know what you are going through, it's a confusing and sometimes difficult journey and so FRUSTRATING when others cant see what you can, but you were part of that, you know why they cant see it. Ultimately it's totally liberating, I'm 2 years out and just starting to feel almost normal!
Good to read your post, I hope to see more.
poppy
I wish that everyone I love could see things the way I do. The JWs do not have truth. It seems so crystal clear! But no one can see it but me...
I think that most, including myself, had identical feelings when we first figured it out. Most of us banged our heads against brick walls of indifference or anger in trying to convince others, mostly to no avail.
You have time to plan a safe exit. You may wish to retain relationships with your mother or other family, and that can be done sometimes with success. In my case, I couldn't quit speaking about the things I knew, so out I went 4 years back.
Stick around. This is a great place to work out the frustrations and adjustments that come from leaving the religion.
Welcome.
Jeff
Welcome,
Many of have had our lives destroyed by these fools...
Welcome to JWD.
I was also raised in the borg. I have 3 kids. The witlesses have been saying to avoid having kids since the turn of the LAST century. Fortunately for us some ignored them! I have found that to witlesses, the religion is first, family last. I told my mom I left on Tuesday, no phone calls yet.
Look forward to your posts.
momzcrazy
Thanks for posting - stick around.
I also delayed having children as I didn't want to bring them up the same way as I had been.
Terrible.
Life is better now and a lot of that is down to JWD - also check jwfacts.com the poster of the same username above was too modest to plug his own website but it is an excellent resource.
Besty
Welcome from Blondie
As to your mother's desire not to be a grandmother in this system, look around the KH and circuit, are jws in general not having children or is it just the opposite. In fact, look at who get baptized. 80 to 90 percent are children of jws. There would be little or no increase especially in the US if jws stopped having children.
I remember my grandmother telling me about that thinking from Rutherford in the 30's and 40's. Then they changed their tune.
1938AD Advice: Delay marriage and children till after Armageddon???
1938 "Would it be scripturally proper for them to marry and begin to rear children? No, is the answer, which is supported by the scriptures....I will be far better to be unhampered and without burdens, that they may do the Lords will now, as the Lord commands, and also be without hindrance during Armageddon. … Those... who now contemplate marriage, it would seem, would do better if they wait a few years, until the fiery storm of Armageddon is gone." (Face the Facts, 1938, p. 46, 47, 50)
1941 Should men and women, both of whom are Jonadabs or "other sheep" of the Lord, now marry before Armageddon and bring forth children? they may chose to do so, but the admonition or advice of the scriptures appears to be against it. (Children; 1941; 3,000,000 ed.; p. 312)
1941 The prophetic picture seems to set forth the correct rule, to wit: The three sons of Noah and their wives were in the ark and were saved from the flood. They did not have any children, however, until after the flood. They began to have children two years after the flood. (Genesis 11:10,11) No children were taken into the ark and none were born in the ark, and hence none were brought out of the ark. Only eight persons went in and eight came out of the ark. (1 Peter 3:20; Genesis 8:18) That would appear to indicate that it would be proper that those who will form the "great multitude" should wait until after Armageddon to bring children into the world. (Children; 1941; 3,000,000 ed.; p. 312-313)
1941 "Armageddon is surely near, and during that time the Lord will clean off the earth everything that offends and is disagreeable. ... From now on we shall have our heart devotion fixed on The Theocracy, knowing that soon we shall journey forever together in the earth. Our hope is that within a few years our marriage may be consummated and, by the Lord's grace, we shall have sweet children that will be an honor to the Lord. We can well defer our marriage until lasting peace comes to the earth." (J. F. Rutherford, Children, 1941, p.366)
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w513/1p.159QuestionsFromReaders***Whether married couples in the truth want to have children or not is for them to decide, not us. Each couple must consider its own circumstances and its own purposes in view, and decide the matter and adopt a course and then take the responsibility before God for such course and its consequences. But we do unequivocally maintain that the purpose of marriage before God is the production of children, and hence if any married couples want children now, before Armageddon, that is perfectly proper and no one should criticize them for so doing, thereby meddling in their business. Neither should any be criticized for not having children, nor should we meddle in as to their reason why not. Private marital affairs are not the business of outsiders.
Children are not to be viewed as a hindrance to serving God and hence to be unwanted. Otherwise Paul would not have written, "She will be kept safe through childbearing." Nor would he have advised women under certain circumstances "to bear children". (1 Tim. 2:15; 5:14, NW) Under similar conditions his counsel applies today. If children come in the natural way according to which God instituted human marriage, then they are to be welcomed, even now, before the divine mandate is reissued to Armageddon survivors. You are grateful for having been brought into life, even within this present evil world, and so your children can be grateful for the same reason.
Hi and Welcome aboard. You brought up an interesting point about prayer and "worldly people", I always sat and thought, wait a freaking minute here.......when there would be an assembly part with someone saying, how lost they were and how they prayed for help and the brothers knocked on the door five minutes later and that's how they got the "truth". Hold on, back that cart up, I thought "Jehover" only listened to the prayers of "his" people and not all those badly worldly types who were praying all wrong. hehehe They bend and twist whatever they want, when they want, to suit their purposes.
