Anyone Remember The Chaperone Thing? (page 4)

OUTLAW

HA-HA-HA,Englishman you sure know how to raise old ghosts,but then it is hallaween isn`t it.

The congregation had a bit of trouble chaperoning us coz we had already been dating a couple of years when we got involved with the WTS. The boy friend owned a two seater sports car and attended university so they had a whole host of things they were itching to change about us, but they must have been nervous of frightening us off. They had to wait until we were well and truly IN before laying down the law with us. This came in the form of virtually insisting we get married not long after we were baptised. I was 19 & he was 20 and he was still at uni. But they got their way. We married and it was really miserable for a long time. We were soooo poor and way too young. WE are still together but no thanx to them. We married in 1972 and stopped meetings in November 1979. Disfellowshipped together in 1981 for no longer believing it was the truth. Have had a great life and have come to appreciate that there are far worse things than having sex out of wedlock! Far worse!

Marilyn (btw they also put the pressure on to sell the sports car. But we bought another one 5 yrs ago)

Moridin

My ex hated the chaperone thing. She always said that if something was going to happen it would no matter who was there. She also said that if there was always someone there you would never be able to get to know the other person. Needless to say neither of us attend any meetings and haven't for at least three years. When I lived in Arizona my best friend just happened to be a female. We weren't supposed to talk on the phone with someone of the opposite sex so my landlord who was a witness tattled on me and the elders talked to me. I pretty much told them that if they thought they were going to tell me who I was going to talk to and who I wasn't and who I was going to hang around with and who I wasn't then they could go f*ck themselves. They weren't to pleased. Actually shocked was a good word for it. I was a very outspoken person if you couldn't tell.

hungry4life

In California chaperoning was alive and well 3 years ago when I left. I had a friend who was 34 and in good standing and had 3 kids ages 7, 12 and 14 she was dating a brother aged 29 (also in good standing) with a 3 year old son. As you can imagine they had no privacy, took the kids everywhere with them and still got counseled on what a "proper chaperone" is (your kids don't count). Being a mom I can say kids are the ultimate chaperone even after your married. Nothing like kids to cut in and curb even the most voracious sexual appetites. {:)} The whole thing is such a joke!
Nobody in the congregation ever really wanted to chaperone for other couples and they wound up being so desperate to see each other they would have to ask the least popular and strange ones along. Then it got even more specific with people being judged on the supposed spiritual strength of their chaperone. Oh and of course other dating couples were not allowed to accompany as chaperones (even double daters needed the fifth wheel to avoid compromising behavior) This is to pathetic for me to go on.

zev

englishman:

and everyone else. g'day.

as always e-man, another thought provoking post, this time, however, i think i'll share my own person experiences with this one.

in the mid to late 70's i was interested in a certain "sister" and i can say that to the best of my recolection, we were never "alone". though we spent alot of time together, usually in group activitys, my sister or someone HAD to be with us at all times. my parents were very strict about this. and though they were tough on me, as i was the frist born, they were tougher on my sister, if that were even possible! anyways....one of the things that till this day sticks in my mind....was sitting together at one sunday meeting, my mum and dad somehow got sat behind us, and during the course of the meeting, we just sorta naturally got as close as possible. there were no arm rests on the typical dubby kh plastic chairs, so we sat as close as possible. i rememebr my mum tapping me on the shoulder and gesturing for us to move apart. i'll never forget that. i mean, we weren't doing anything wrong, i couldnt believe it. i love my mum dearly, but that was taking it just a little to far. i wonder if this person i'm speaking of, remembers that? do you?

next, in the early early 80's, i was in my early early 20's, already living on my own and doing fine, still worshiping the publishing company, and met this,unknown to me honest, 15 year old whom i'll call melanie. actually i call her that because that was her name. now, while it wasn't unusual to have a chaperone, this little dub troll was extremely manipulitive, and would purposely arrainge things so that we would be alone and doing things alone. so, most of our time was spent without the chaperone. we never crossed any lines we shouldn't have. after all, she was the p.o.'s daughter

next, {see a pattern developing here?} i met my dub wife. still early 80's. i was 21, she was 29. with 2 kids. another poster said something about kids killing the mood. well i will say they are like having built in parent sitters. but amazingly enough, while we did do alot with other couples, we were adults, {kinda} and did our own thing. NO ONE ever said a word about our unchaperoned activities. including the many nights i would get home at sunrise. needless to say when my step kids were starting the dating thing, i let them be the judge of what was right and wrong. they were brought up well, i knew they would do the right things. they did, as far as i know.

anyways thats my story.

-Zev
-The "Truth" is out there! TRUST NO ONE!
I WANT TO BELIEVE!

Abaddon

Ah, memories...

Well, I remember one pioneer sister my age; I took her back to my parent's house once, they weren't in, and the girl sat like a terrified sparrow with her coat on on the edge of a chair in the living room, sipping a cup of tea. She wouldn't even go IN my room.

I also got ticked off by my parents, and asked what my intentions were, for chatting with her after the hall, because we just chatted together!

When I started going out with my x-wife, who had been re-instated after getting df'd (she had a little boy), we were called before an unofficial Judicial Committee, about five weeks after we'd started dating. This had consisted of two chaparoned dates, after which we couldn't be arsed, as it was too much hassle finding chaparones, and then going out together, or being at her place (her sister lived with her). This unjustified hassle made me decide getting married was a good idea, but it was just lust and wanting to say "fuck you!!".

Looking back it is all so pathetic; we went to see my brother and his wife, and he called my dad and said we'd been 'all over each other', which meant holding hands and having an arm around each other!!

Sad isn't it?

Keep on rocking in the free world...

Englishman

I recall when our CO's single daughter lived in our congregation and resided in her parents home whilst they were out on the circuit. We had just had an assembly on the Isle of Wight, and her fiance had missed the last train home due to the IOW ferry docking late in Portsmouth. I think that he lived out towards London.

So, he slept downstairs on the settee and she went to her room. Well, all hell broke loose when they told her dad the situation. She was placed on probation and banned from pioneering, this was all relayed to the conregation in Portsmouth.

I wont say who the CO was, after all I have said MOORE than enough!

Englishman.

Nostalgia isn't what it used to be....

bluesapphire

I guess I'm in Slipnslidemaster's corner here. I had three kids but they never stopped me and my dub boyfriend. The kids have bedtimes ya know. And then we would go upstairs into my room and fool around for hours. We did everything except penetration - even taking showers together and baths. Then when we'd go out in public or the hall we would make sure to have our chaperones. Goes to show ya the rediculousness of the whole rule!

slipnslidemaster

...the only corner to be in...

Slipnslidemaster:"The average person thinks he isn't."
- Father Larry Lorenzoni

rhett

I remember a couple times I chaperoned for one of my friends and his fiance. I was never very good at it. I was asking them if they'd like to be left alone for a while and if so I'd be happy to leave.
I did find the perfect way to get around chaperones; date outside the cult. That way there won't be anyone there to see you boinking. What perverts, wanting people to watch you doing it.

I don't need to fight
To prove I'm right
I don't need to be forgiven.

Anyone Remember The Chaperone Thing?