Respect and recent drama on the forum

by SnakesInTheTower 31 Replies latest jw friends

SnakesInTheTower

purps has an excellent topic on respect..Respect-O-Meter .. Go read it if you haven't already.....though I alluded to this there I did not want to hijack her thread....
Because of recent events on this board, I have lost the respect of certain posters. This loss of respect has taken different forms.
In some cases, posters have come right out privately and said "I have lost respect for you because of what you did." Ironically, I respect those individuals for their spine in saying so.
Other posters have probably lost respect for me but refuse to say anything or communicate at all. I have to presume they have lost respect for me. I would have more respect for them if they would just say what is on their mind. I respect that they may not be able to do so, and I respect their request not to talk it out or talk to me. Maybe in time I will gain both their respect and their friendship back.
I certainly made some mistakes.....and for that I have already profusely apologized. I stand by what I did (ie, going to the mods).......but I can certainly learn from the situation and would do things differently so matters dont escalate to where they did..thus avoiding the need to go to the mods in the first place........ I know some of you won't like me saying this...By abiding by rules of this forum, which we agree to each and every time we post a reply, a topic, or a PM, we are showing respect to each other and to the forum owners and moderators. Keep in mind we are guests here...with an invitation that can be revoked at any time.
This post is absolutely not an attack or personal swipe at any one particular poster. I throw this out there as my opinion....and if you can learn from this...great.... if it applies to you ....then apply what you can.
Of course, there are other so-called "dramas" unfolding as we speak...RichieRich, JunctionGuy, etc....those too will pass, just as TrevorGate and DannyGate have already faded into the archives... in the greater scheme of things....all of those things are minor.... especially when you compare it to the real life dramas that are happening to individuals here in real life...just go to Sad Emo's weekly vigil thread...that should put all of this in perspective...
I hope over time I gain the respect and friendship of those whose respect and friendship I have apparently lost.
I kept a ow profile on purpose this past week....and probably will continue to do so relative to my past posting history ......this is not a topic or thread to rehash what happened...it is not a place to attack me or for me to attack you. The other person that was involved cannot respond directly..so it is not fair to rehash it without their direct input...and why should we anyway.... I hold no animosity toward that person...neither should anyone else.
Peace to all of you... may the new year bring you and your families happiness. And it is my fondest hope and wish that each of us has the greatest gift of all....freedom.
Snakes ()
SnakesInTheTower

I moved this post off of purps' topic...before it got out of hand... and moved it here...
Friendship is directly related to respect. I do not believe you can have a genuine friendship without respect. I do not believe you can have trust without respect. I do not believe you can have friendship without trust.
Those three things, friendship, trust, and respect are, in my opinion, inextricably intertwined.
I must say this...Respect is a valuable personal commodity, limited in its supply. Respect should not tossed about...given or taken away, in such a casual manner. To say you have lost respect for someone is a serious matter. Is it worth tossing away friendships over something as relatively minor as some of the recent spats on this forum? To me that is a terrible waste. Wouldn't it be better to look at a person's history, whether real life or posting, and compare that to what you say you have lost respect over .....before you decide to toss aside respect as well as friendships? We all make mistakes.
Each of us came to this board looking for something....maybe it was understanding, compassion, information, a listening ear. Many of us came to this forum looking for friendship...because "friendships" within the Borg are based on a very shaky foundation..and many of us lost most, if not all, of our friends as we woke up to the truth about the "Truth (TM)." Maybe the internet is not the best place to find friendships...yet, I have found friends here...and have gotten and given respect...and many of you have too......and I have lost friends here and lost respect... I hope one day I gain the respect and friendships back....over time, maybe it will happen...
In recent threads regarding RichieRich and JunctionGuy...I see the respect-o-meter jumping all over the place... some people attack those posters...others support them..and everything in between..but for everyone who posted, there are many others who have viewed the thread and not jumped into the fray.... even if we don't respect those posters or disagree with them, can we at least be respectful in how express our disagreements when we post? Do we have to jump into the cage and engage in the verbal battery by attacking each other? The best way to win a war is to "divide and conquer"....and cause dissension in the ranks.....and that is what seems to be happening on this forum.
I personally dont care about bringing down the WT....its not going to happen by our hand....but I do care what happens to this forum and the people on it...did you see that word? PEOPLE....People with real feelings. Trolls and troublemakers....they dont deserve our respect...or our attention. For everyone else...PLEASE ....be respectful in your words, even if you dont respect them as individuals. If we keep this bickering and infighting up, the forum certainly won't crumble, but it sure becomes a less inviting place to be.....that is not to say that we wont have trouble..any big group of people will....however, this has gone beyond stupid....
This thread on respect seemed to me to open the right time ...but not the right place.... for me to address a recent event on this forum that relate directly to respect. (Out of respect for purps, I will not hijack the topic at hand)...that topic can be found elsewhere.....
I am still lurking, certainly posting a lot less...but you can be certain that I am going to take a lot more time before I hit SUBMIT......I hope you do as well.
With love to each of you and hopes that next year brings you happiness and freedom to think and enjoy life to the fullest...this is the only one we get.
Snakes ()
nvrgnbk

Snakes, I respect very much that you're making an apology.
You're very loved and respected by many here.
I include myself in that group.
I wish you well.
As an aside, as one that cares about and respects you, I'll give you my sincere opinion that you still sound like you're lecturing people, even in your apology.
I'm sure you don't mean to come across like that, but that's what I'm hearing.
If I'm wrong or have a distorted view of things, I apologize.
If this board is about support, it's also about growth.
I welcome any observations you have to share with me, openly or via PM, and if you're my friend, I expect them to be honest and direct, not holding back for fear of hurting my feelings.
In the end, respecting, accepting, and loving yourself is all that matters.
Peace to you, Snakes.
Leolaia

I respect some people too much to throw out an opinion before I know all the facts. That's all I have to say about that.
nvrgnbk

See, Snakes?
Here's the problem.
After I submitted my sincere post to you, I read your PM, suggesting that I take my post off purps' thread.
LOL!
That's the problem.
You don't have to tell other people what to do.
Relax.
Be yourself.
SnakesInTheTower

nvr...
I don't intend to come across as lecturing..even with the comment at the end that I hope people think about what they say before hitting that good old SUBMIT button...
What I posted is strictly my opinion...I dont expect people to agree....I didn't post it to gain affirmation..or kudos, or whatever....I am pretty secure with myself these days now that I don't have the Borg breathing down my neck every waking moment.
Voltaire said "I do not agree with a thing that you say, but will defend to the death your right to say it"
I agree with some things you post, other things I don't. Other than trolls and troublemakers, I will try to refrain from attacking anyone else here.
Snakes ()
SnakesInTheTower

nvr...
Look...I had realized after you posted your reply that maybe my post on purps thread was not the right place for this topic...and I moved it..and since your post was a direct reply to what I wrote and not to what purps wrote...that is why I suggested in a PM that you copy it here and edit it of her topic... it was merely a suggestion, not an order...chill...
snakes ()
nvrgnbk

Cool, Snakes.
I agree with some things you post, other things I don't. Other than trolls and troublemakers, I will try to refrain from attacking anyone else here.
No one is looking for agreement.
Maybe vehemently disagreeing isn't the same as "attacking"?
...chill...
I'm chillin'. LOL!
Take care,
Nate
Superfine Apostate

trolls lie in the eye of the beholder.
Nosferatu

The fun never stops on message forums!
When you're part of an online community, you'll see things, situations, and people come and go. I moderate another message board and see my share of the same type of stuff that goes on here, and I've even outed a few of the liars and trolls myself.
People come and go. People give out too much information, and some give out too much false information. People get involved in heated debates and drama. Wow, the online communities are pretty identical to real-life communities!

Respect and recent drama on the forum

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