by nvrgnbk 24 Replies latest jw friends
Those atheists can be so annoying!
Funny they dont bother me ..... Its the trouble makers that want to start fights that make me discouraged. Because I DO love most on here & I have only seen a few...I find the JWD line is changing rapidly.... But maybe it is my old age, I see were we dont forgive & foreget...I know forgetting is a weakness that I suffer immensly from nowadays. But there again thats OLD AGE!!!! you gonna get there too..
I thought that was a left over from my abusive alcohol filled childhood.
I like the fact that most of the time here, we can disagree and even argue fine points without turning on each other. It's normal to disagree over things, we are not the robots the Watchtower of Babel tried to make us into. I appreciate the differences here in everyone. I also like it when we can all act like adults and sometimes agree to disagree and leave it at that.
momz
I do not like confrontation but will face it necessary
I also like Hilary's way of arguing, firm but not rude. I really do not like rudeness and generally find very little here
I am much more honest since I left the wts, partly because i am no longer living a lie.
I think honesty and kindness are sometimes uncomfortable bedfellows, but good for each other.
regards llbh
I have a weird personality. I like to be a people pleaser, but I also like a good argument. Different people see more of one side or the other of me. And it can change over time. I am less a people pleaser than before. But I also argue less for the fun of it. On the one side, I am not going to give over so much of myself to please others anymore. I might edit myself a bit more(keep silent on an issue I don't want to touch with a ten foot pole), but I am less likely to fib to make someone happy. In debating or arguing, I am less likely to take advantage of the others weaknesses, or to ignore the shortcomings of my argument. I think I am more honest on both sides, kinder to myself and others. OTOH, if I am passionately PISSED, that will come out. I think my passion matters more if I am not (in real life and cyber life) hollering and putting exclamation points at the end of every sentence.
In other threads, there was talk about those who 'egged' on another poster who did some silly stuff. Mostly dumb kid stuff. He also did some good stuff, some brave stuff. Some of these things were intermingled a bit. He did get encouragement. From me-I hope on the good stuff, getting clear of things that hurt him before. I also let him know when some things were freaking me out a bit. Some things were not my business to comment on in any case. I don't think it is encouragement to remain silent on someones weight when I don't see it brought into the discussion. When he started losing, and was happy about it-then it was appropriate to comment. Personally, I hate it when people comment on folks weight like it matters to anything else that is going on. Fat or skinny, its really no ones business what size you wear.
This is my friend board, and sometimes friends disagree or fight. Then they get over it. I usually go other places to debate and get my hackles raised:)
When I first came here, Terry bugged me, I thought he was abrasive, kind of rude and way too blunt. His observations made me uncomfortable. Now I want to marry the guy. So go figure. I like that in a man:) I have changed a LOT since I started here!
Mouthy, how are you,dear?? I hope you are doing well!
Most JWs care about THEMSELVES. Sorry, but if you don't see that, perhaps you're not trying to see the Truth. I've met some very nice JWs too but I know that most would pay a visit to an elderly person because the CO was coming, they were "encouraged" to do it, or because they could count their time. Now, I'm not saying EVERY JW was guilty of this but certainly too many were.
You are making sweeping judgments yourself, Grace in some of your comments. You don't know "evidently" anything about me, who I "loved" that I could see in the congregation over the years or anyone else for that matter. You need not be judgmental and suggest that I didn't "try to love". I'm surprised with you but that's ok.
I think it has a little to do with motivation................our motivation for being here and how we go about handling that.......in some ways I think it reflects a typical congregation.
Human nature usually means we are predisposed to needing to feel that we belong, that we are loved and that we are understood.........we think we dont care what people think but we dont like it when people dont agree with us or understand our viewpoint.
Some people feel more comfortable when there is a group attack/disapproval of one member.........it can help them feel ok.........but it doesnt really, because that need to feel comfortable is born out of their own insecurity.
Some people need to feel right and that they have the answers because to not have the answers is..........scary!!!
Some people are outspoken or outrageous...........for various reasons to do with liking the attention, or rebelling against control that has been enforced on them.
We on this forum are a huge mixed bag and IMHO reflect in many ways a typical group of people.......yes even a JW congregation and we are just playing our parts as we would in any situation the theatre of life deems to throw at us.
Fi
PS..........I come back here for the incredible brains, intellect and wit of some of the posters.......Hilary Step is one of my faves......I lurve him.......but I dont love him.......I dont know the guy.......so there are many types of love/lurve.
And Mouthy has one of the biggest hearts on here....
Just my own personal musings.......
you can't help but love Hillary, even me!
Many of us have made good friendships here, but it's fair to say that we're not all going to be friends.
The first person that contacted me via PM told me that here or at apostafests it is not unlike being at the KH. Some people you click with, some you don't. Some you will be friends with and share similar thoughts and likes, and some you will not. That advice I know is really simplistic, but true nevertheles, and I appreciate it to this day. It really took the pressure off my expectations.
As a JW you are taught to internalise conflict, disagreement and confrontation but many in society are not. Some even hunt you down with their persistent hounding and goading - much like the school playground. How long before you show your true colours? The fact you are showing them never is accepted by those who don't feel the way you do. And sometimes you may respond in kind simply out of having had enough or even out of boredom to bring on the conclusion they seem so keen to arrive at. Like grazing animals in the wild - if you leave them be they tend to be peaceable but if you keep worrying them you may get a horn up the arse.
R. I understood everything you said. I am I getting smarterer?
momz
