Fear of conflict, confrontation, disagreement- A leftover from our JW past?

by nvrgnbk 24 Replies latest jw friends

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  jgnat

  Naah. EVERYBODY hates conflict, confrontation, and disagreement. Except for type A's. The toughest job I have as a leader is to confront someone about the error of their ways. I have to do that even if the person is likable. It can be very awkward, and not everyone can hear the painful truth.

  Consider fairy tales. The sweet and the fair are the good girls. The nasties are all witches. It took me a long time to figure out that most people are not black and white, they are greys. But not alien greys.

  Mouthy! Great to see you! Check out my thread in your honor: http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/148214/1.ashx
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  Gregor

  NVR has opened an important subject for discussion. When I look at the current Active Topics pages I am seeing less and less about the WTB&TS and more drivel about about...well, look for yourself. I will be honest and say that there is a lot of phoney baloney expressions of undying (pick one) love, affection, friendship, caring, and the (((((((((((hugs)))))))))))) and 's are getting downright nauseating. It seems if you can't take a moment to compose a sincere expression of sympathy then a junior high school yearbook emoticon sentiment is good enough. All this shallow emoticon emotion leads to situations like we've seen lately.

  I assumed that RR was a troubled young man when I saw his pictures and no one is going to tell me is has a bright future ahead of him. In a pigs ass. How some could take the current information so seriously is beyond me. The Trevor case should have been a wake up call.

  I have posted my share of fluff, but I'd really like for us to start laying out more tasty tidbits, experiences and observations for the cold, hungry, JW that may stumble in looking for sustenance and covering. It has to be repeated. All the good stuff posted here in the past is like a 100 ft stack of old newspapers. Who has time to cycle through it. It needs repetition for emphasis as they used to teach in the TM School.

  OK, I'm done.
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  mouthy

  Mouthy! Great to see you! Check out my thread in your honor: http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/148214/1.ashx

  Yes dear I did just see it. I tried some of the games but I am too stupid to get them :( But Your a doll to think of me
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  changeling

  "Is it realistic, is it reasonable?" Yes, I think it is. I trully don't see the need for heaving insults at every opportunity. I don't think it's conducive to anything good.

  It is entirely possible (easy even) to express one's opinion w/o attacking.

  Some of you will never know how deeply some of us feel and how badly it hurts to be insulted, belittled and mocked. Or maybe you do and that's how you get your "jollies".

  Frankly nvr, I'm surprised a sensitive guy like you would consider taking up for rude and hurtful people in any way.

  Understanding where they come from is one thing, condoning their behavior is another.

  changeling
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  BlackSwan of Memphis

  I don't think it's reasonable to expect it because this board (as are many others) is made up of many different kinds of people who are on varying stages out of the watchtower or dealing with family members who are in the religion.

  I wish oh how I wish I wished that life were a bowl of pitted cherries....but I don't.

  Not now, not anymore.

  Heated debate can be good. Is it nice to call people names? No, I guess not. I know myself enough to know that sometimes I get pissed off and I might say something rude, because I'm not perfect. No one is. And that's why we can't expect a perfect forum. Can we try? Yes.

  But for the most part, I have to say I think people here do a pretty good job of trying to be nice.

  Yep, sometimes we break forum rules and hope we will not get caught.Ya know we call someone a name, or we swear out of line, or we start slinging mud...

  But ya know....crap, I'm glad I didn't walk away just because I got my feathers ruffled and a little miffed....I'm glad I stuck it out. I'm glad people told me to look beyond the words and look at the meaning. I'm glad that I have waded through heated debates with friends even when I thought the friendship couldn't withstand it and I'm glad that sometimes people say something the wrong way, because at least they said something and it got it out in the open and it turned into a discussion that might not have taken place otherwise.

  No it doesn't feel good, no I haven't always felt this way, and no I would not choose to have someone just hurl an insult at me...

  But sometimes we just can't be perfect...

  Ok that's enough glad for the night...I'm making myself sick...

  anyhow...you get my point.....